Do You Really Want To Transform Education, Dave?

Call-Me-Dave has come in for a lot of stick about his education policy. And it's mostly been well deserved.

But if he really, really wants to change education in this country, he'd do well to sack all the Kathy McDermotts and replace them with responsible adults:

A seven-year-old child who threatened to stab another pupil during a playground spat is being investigated by police.

The boy was arguing with the other child during a break when he was overheard by a teaching assistant.

The headteacher was informed and called 999.

Hang on, that can't be right? Surely that should read 'the headteacher was informed and told the nosewiper not to bother her with something so trivial', right?

Sadly, no:

Headteacher Kathy McDermott yesterday defended her actions, saying she called officers to the school because she was concerned the pupils would develop a 'fixation with knives' and wanted the behaviour 'nipped in the bud'.

Oh, for the love of...

Look, sweetie, here's how it goes. You know how you are taller than everyone else at the school? And the only one who doesn't need help doing up their coat buttons when the bell sounds at 4:00?

You are the adult. Behave like it, OK?

'I called the main police line as I could not find the number for our excellent police community support worker,' she added.

Oh, right. You are employed to run a large organisation and you can't locate a simple phone number? Give me a break...

'I wanted her to come in and talk to the parents and children about their behaviour. The children were talking to each other in a very unkind manner.'

A 'very unkind manner'...? Are you kidding?

You called 999 because the kiddies were being unkind to one another?

Why, in the name of God, are the council tax payers of Peterborough forking out eye-watering sums to employ a useless drain on resources like you? They'd be better off doing a Lindy Chamberlain and letting a dingo take care of their child-raising for them.

It's a far more attractive creature, and I gather it doesn't whine half so much...

So what sort of school is Middleton Primary anyway? Well, according to the 'Telegraph', just the sort you's epect to be employing a timeserving box ticker like Kathy McDermott:

Middleton Primary School is a mixed school for children aged four to 11 and had 291 students at its last Ofsted inspection in November 2006.

It was rated as a good school with a "harmonious and inclusive community" and a satisfactory curriculum.

But inspectors described the school as serving "an area of higher than average unemployment and social disadvantage in Peterborough"

Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure...