Sunday, 24 January 2010

Well, Yes, I Suppose It's An Achievement...

...to be so good at the ukulele while in primary school that you get invited to play at the Tower Ballroom in Blackpool, but how is it diverse?

How does it compare to the musical oeuvre of Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber? Can you play 'Smack My Bitch Up' on it?
...according to a special report by Ofsted: "Music lessons and the curriculum do not provide sufficient challenge and, as a result, pupils do not make adequate progress. Achievement in music is inadequate."
What would be 'adequate', I wonder, to an Ofsted musical inspector?

9 comments:

  1. I suspect if they had specialised in, say, African drumming, or West Indian steel band playing, the inspector would have been more positive.

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  2. I think you would probably get 100% and an A** if you were able to play "The Red Flag".

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  3. Playing the Minute Walz in 30 seconds?

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  4. Of course you can play Smack My Bitch Up on it. Can play anything on it, and the Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain do.

    My personal favourite is Moriconi's The Good The Bad and The Ugly
    but there are hundreds of clips to choose from, and that's before you've considered buying a CD or going to a concert.

    Nothing like Ofsted for sucking the joy out of art, music, language, abstract thought. Can OFSTED fill the Albert Hall and coordinate thousands of people playing Ode To Joy on their own Ukes?

    Note for OFSTED
    This is how you involve children - or anybody - in music and is one of the very few good arguments for the BBC.

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  5. Not with the words WE used in the army;

    "I am out of work and on the dole,

    You can shove the red flag up your hole."

    As to what can be played;

    Duelling banjos?

    Includes inbred, toothless, thick bastard with bad eye sight. And not only that the low lifes like queer sex as well.

    Go down a TREAT with Gordons psychophants.

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  6. The first para was addressed to John R.

    Just to keep things straight.

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  7. Furor, not literally I trust?
    We've not even been properly introduced?

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  8. Think I spotted a typo, JuliaM.

    'How does it compare to the musical oeuvre of Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber?'

    Musical ordure, surely?

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  9. "Of course you can play Smack My Bitch Up on it. Can play anything on it, and the Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain do.

    My personal favourite is Moriconi's The Good The Bad and The Ugly.."


    Wow!

    And yes, Ofsted seem to know the price of everything, yet the value of nothing, don't they?

    "Musical ordure, surely?"

    Heh!

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