"...He read some books and he oiled his brain, he started to work and he started to train, and he knew he'd never be the same again..."

A generation of state-educated athletes should have been created for the London Olympics.

But a third of British medal hopefuls competing in 2012 will have gone to private schools, it emerged yesterday.

And who cares?

Really, who cares?

They aren’t being judged on how they conjugate Latin verbs, or what colour their old school tie is, or even how they play the Eton Wall Game (not currently featuring in the Olympics as far as I know, but give it time…).

Bosses at government agency UK Sport believe the proportion of independently educated athletes will be no lower than it was in the 2008 Beijing Olympics.

In that competition, 37 per cent of British medal winners came from private schools.

And how is this a problem?

Is this yet another of Labour’s barmy ‘social inequality’ drives? If they want more state-school educated athletes, perhaps not selling off all the playing fields would have been a start. Or perhaps investing in sport in the state system.

Oh, wait. They did:

The Government earmarked £2.4billion for state school sport between 2003 and next year with a view to creating athletes for 2012.

But four million youngsters are failing to play regularly in competitive fixtures at school - 72 per cent, according to Government figures.

Another resounding government success!

And why is this? Well, the definition of ‘sport’ seems to be rather elastic, to say the least, which is only to be expected if you leave the definition of such up to the schools:

Meanwhile, 58 per cent of secondary schools - and 32 per cent of all schools - offer cheerleading as a sport, the survey showed. More than one in five offer trampolining, 21 per cent yoga and 18 per cent 'circus skills', it added.

I’m looking hard, but I can’t see those on the Olympics list along with all the running, jumping and throwing things…

How does the government address these criticisms? The same way it does all criticisms – deny them point-blank:

A Department for Children spokesman insisted, however, that 'most Olympians will come from state schools'.

'Our focus is getting young people to take up five hours of high quality PE and sport a week and we are making great strides towards this.'

Well, let’s hope by the time 2012 rolls round, they’ve added the 1000metre Great Strides event…

A spokesman for UK Sport, which distributes lottery funding to Olympic hopefuls, said: 'The educational background of athletes has no bearing on how UK Sport invests its funds.'

Quite.

And nor should it…