Thursday, 31 March 2011

NuPuritan Bandwagon Rumbles On…

Health officials are asking north Essex people to keep a daily record of the amount they drink during April.

Anglian Community Enterprise, which is responsible for community healthcare in north Essex, wants the records kept as part of an alcohol awareness campaign.
I thought the NHS was in a dreadful state, with staff being cut left, right and centre, and people being denied vital health care?

Yet somehow they - and the equally cash-strapped educational system - always find the staff and money and time for this sort of thing…
Alix Sheppard, health trainer, said: “It is aimed at the vast majority who consider themselves social drinkers but who are still probably drinking more than is healthy for them.”
Translation: “We’ve struck out with the underclass alcoholics, who just ignore or assault us, so now we’ve turned to easier prey, the middle class social drinkers who won’t yell ‘gerroutavityaponce!’ and throw bottles of urine at us..”
“It’s not unusual to want to take a little time out and have a drink or two.

“The problem with alcohol is often one drink leads to another. Regularly drinking too much has health risks.”
Translation: “You want a drink? YOU CAN’T HANDLE A DRINK!”
To take part in the survey, call 0800 7313133 or e-mail healthtrainers@ acecic.nhs.uk
Oh, I’m tempted! I wonder if I can make their surveyors blanch..?
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10 comments:

  1. Mike31 March 2011 at 10:43

    a free phone number its almost too good to be true, I'm ringing now! Do you think they'll call the police or a paramedic?!?

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  2. Mike31 March 2011 at 10:45

    bloody busy line, Guess I'll pour another drink and wait 30 seconds

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  3. Mike31 March 2011 at 11:09

    nope busy line again, enough to turn anyone to drink, anyone for a pint or six?

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  4. Anonymouslemming31 March 2011 at 11:11

    @Mike - I was going to call, but the pub I'm in won't let me use the phone. Bastards!

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  5. Mike31 March 2011 at 12:10

    tell em its an emergency or just have another on me ;)

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  6. The Travelling Toper31 March 2011 at 15:47

    Is 'Health Trainer' now a obligatory position for all local authorities and how simple minded can people be to take part in these surveys.

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  7. Woman on a Raft31 March 2011 at 18:27

    Keep an eye on Anglian Community Enterprise. They appear to be part of the NHS which has been spun off formally and legally as a not-for-profit company i.e. profits go back to the enterprise.

    It is listed Companies House as company no. 07376913 but, apart from the directors names, there isn't a lot of data yet.

    At the moment it is difficult to find out what, apart from doing some volunteer coordinating, they actually do. If GPs are going to take over the PCT functions it follows there is less for Anglian Community Enterprise to do.

    I fail to see how Alix Sheppard, the volunteer coordinator, is going to cover her own wages. I certainly do not want to buy any and I doubt if any of the other people who use the 'service' do, either.

    Presumably the taxpayer ended up paying for the nosh and venue hire for 150 in January.

    http://www.northeastessex.nhs.uk/Downloads/Health-Trainers/December%202010.pdf

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  8. Uncle Badger31 March 2011 at 23:49

    The 0800 number impressed me, too.

    I have a 'thing' about gmmint departments using chargeable numbers when they force us to call them (the kleptocrats at HMRC, to name but one).

    It also contrasts oddly with the vile policy of imposing high car park charges at hospitals and the evil rates for telephone calls to and from hospital patients, doesn't it?

    How long before the hangings start? I want to make sure I have sufficient piano wire.

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  9. blueknight1 April 2011 at 00:40

    I always get thirsty after eating my fish and chips smothered with salt

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  10. JuliaM1 April 2011 at 05:24

    "bloody busy line, Guess I'll pour another drink and wait 30 seconds"

    :)

    "@Mike - I was going to call, but the pub I'm in won't let me use the phone. Bastards!"

    So unreasonable! ;)

    "Presumably the taxpayer ended up paying for the nosh and venue hire for 150 in January.
    "

    Oh, undoubtedly!

    "I have a 'thing' about gmmint departments using chargeable numbers when they force us to call them (the kleptocrats at HMRC, to name but one)."

    I believe they were hauled over the coals about that at the recent Parliamentary hearing, weren't they?

    Actually, if you want a good chuckle, reading the MPs on that committee tearing into Dame Leslie Strathie makes amusing reading..

    "I always get thirsty after eating my fish and chips smothered with salt"

    :D

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