A former wild child teenager whose behaviour shocked TV viewers has marked turning her life around…Ooh, by apologising to those she’s wronged? By taking up a career in charitable work?
… by getting a tattoo of her idol.Oh.
Well, could still be salvaged. Is it of a famous philosopher or philanthropist? The Dalai Lama?
Jemma Henley, from Oxford, was known for her outrageous behaviour on Channel 4 reality show Brat Camp but is now forging a career as a glamour model.
And to celebrate, the 22-year-old, who was expelled from five schools but has since posed for Nuts, Zoo, Maxim and Loaded, has had a full-length portrait of Jordan tattooed on her right arm.Lovely….
A Zeitgeist story indeed; a 'glamour' model - surely the ultimate misnomer - has a tattoo of another glamour model on her arm.
ReplyDeleteDid that tattooed portrait, I wonder, itself include Jordan's own numerous tattoos* in a sort of meta-tattoo-fest?
*In an idle moment I looked them up:
'...a pink bow tattoo on her lower back, another pink bow and ribbon with two small hearts on the top of her right foot, a crown and word PRINCESS on the underside of her left wrist, hearts for her two boys and ex-husband on her right wrist, another heart on her pelvis and a memorial tattoo to her kids on the back of her neck.' - rather like the unholy offspring of Claire's Accessories and a ten-year-old's pencilcase.
All 3 of my sons had tatts way before they turned 18, despite the inane Nanny-Knows-Best Act. If you're old enough to marry, join Crown Forces or to drive a car (the single most dangerous thing a teen can do) then you are old enough to have a pseudo Celtic swirls or dodgy japanese calligraphy perma-inked on to your body.
ReplyDeleteItinerant Tattooists now earn a good living; have Tat Gun will travel.
" ... has had a full-length portrait of Jordan tattooed on her right arm" ..
ReplyDeleteI bet the late King Hussein would have been chuffed to little mint-balls ..
But does it actually look like Jordan (the person, not the country)?
ReplyDeleteMaybe most tattoo artists can do a passable human face* but if this etching in flesh doesn't look like the lovely J does this girl have to explain it away at parties? "Well, it's supposed to be Jordan... sort of looks like her. But if I flex my arm see how her nose moves. Cool, huh?"
*There is a whole range of tatts out there that allegedly are tribal symbols/chinese good fortune words/mysterious and enigmatic sayings that are either completely made up, not at all accurate and above all misspelt. I believe Hayden Panettiere of Heroes 'fame' had an Italian slogan engraved on her body that, um, wasn't spelt as it ought to have been.
(Look for the sign: Money refunded for finding out you've been had, permanently)
Give it a year or two and the daft cow will be demanding that the NHS pay to have it removed.
ReplyDelete@Skindeep, you're not wrong but part of growing up is living with that tattooed heart with a girl's name on it that ISN'T your wife's name.
ReplyDeleteCharacter building the way it was in Granddad's day.
Ancient male rite of passage and all that....like finding out you got the WRONG ear pierced....
I well recall a lad I served with, going for a tattoo (whilst pissed, naturally) in Hong Kong ..
ReplyDeleteHe wanted "RM Cdo" (the abbreviation for Royal Marines Commando) tattooed on his upper arm ..
Quite what happened we never learned .. but next morning he awoke with the words "RM Cdodo" on his arm ..
Oh, how we laughed ...
Like I said...the juxta-positioning of the words 'pissed' and 'get a tattoo' are important parts of our common male heritage....
ReplyDelete...as is the "WTF??!" upon waking next morning thereafter, along with "exactly how old are you, luv?"
Whilst freely admitting to having done my share of "getting pissed" .. I never had the least inclination to get a tattoo ..
ReplyDeleteSome blokes would get tattoos of their Blood Group on the outside of the wrist (under the watch strap) .. but I always thought "Why .. when we're issued with perfectly good ID Discs" ?
@Capt.H
ReplyDeleteDunno the reason for that one although I'd guess its origin goes back some. Maybe for the same reason some guys wear their tags back to front (ie behind the neck) in combat situations or change the chain for a leather boot lace?
As any Sani or battlefield historian can probably confirm, its surprising how often tags survive and how often they don't (part of the reason for so many Unknowns).
That'd be my guess but I'll stand correction, but most of the soldiers of most of the nations I've met had such tatts...along with the obligatory heart+Mum/Mom/Mutti/Mama
"Did that tattooed portrait, I wonder, itself include Jordan's own numerous tattoos* in a sort of meta-tattoo-fest?"
ReplyDeleteHeh! Sounds like the beginning of a Ray Bradbury story...
"...rather like the unholy offspring of Claire's Accessories and a ten-year-old's pencilcase."
Best thread comment EVER!
"If you're old enough to marry, join Crown Forces or to drive a car (the single most dangerous thing a teen can do) then you are old enough to have a pseudo Celtic swirls or dodgy japanese calligraphy perma-inked on to your body."
True enough, but then as anon points out, she'd better not expect us to pay for its removal.
"I bet the late King Hussein would have been chuffed to little mint-balls .."
SNORK!
"Maybe most tattoo artists can do a passable human face..."
ReplyDeleteThis one can't. :)
"...but most of the soldiers of most of the nations I've met had such tatts...along with the obligatory heart+Mum/Mom/Mutti/Mama"
Ahhhh, tradition!
" rather like the unholy offspring of Claire's Accessories and a ten-year-old's pencilcase."
ReplyDeletePriceless. The rest of your comment is good but... wow!
Due to the number of complete and utter fuckwits out there, who will willingly wear an ID disc or tattoo the wrong blood group on their wrist for whatever spurious reason, medics now NEVER trust such information before doing a blood transfusion.
ReplyDeleteBlood typing is quick and accurate these days, so the victim always gets to wait the couple of minutes that the typing takes, just in case they happen to be the sort of knuckle-dragging oxygen-thief who would stick wrong information on a tattoo, etc. Such wastes of skin do tend to have litigious relatives, after all, and the excuse of "We assumed that the blood group info on the ID tag|tattoo|mate's word of mouth etc. was accurate, since what kind of a moron would supply wrong info?" has been tested in court and found wanting.