Thursday, 26 May 2011

Crazy H&S Fears…

A primary school trip to a mosque was cancelled because of ‘ridiculous’ concerns over terrorist attacks in revenge for the death of Osama Bin Laden.
Ummm, what?

Muslims would attack their own mosque? Or this mosque was such a hotbed of fanaticism the worshippers would attack the children? In which case, why is it ever safe for a school trip?

I mean, does anyone ever stop, think, recite their edict back to themselves and think ‘Oh, that’s not going to sound too good if the tabloids get ahold of it’..?
In a statement released last night, Miss Evans said: ‘I would have made the same decision on planned visits to any building or public place that might have been the target of attacks during this period. My first duty is to the safety of the children in my care.

‘I received considerable support from a number of parents for the decision I made, and at no point did I wish to cause offence to any one sector of the community.’
Could have been worse, love, there might have been geese:
Before being allowed to organise the workout sessions, the instructor was asked to provide a list of potential hazards at Chiswick Business Park, which has attractive landscaped gardens centred around a lake.
After struggling to think of any dangers posed at the location, the woman received a form from the park’s own health and safety team highlighting the supposed risk of injuries caused by a ‘collision’ with wildlife. The form stated: ‘Instructors are instructed to stay clear of wildlife (eg low-flying geese)’.
*sigh*
A spokeswoman for Chiswick Park Enjoy-Work, which runs the private park for about a dozen businesses, said all event operators had to provide ‘relevant’ risk assessments.
In some bizarre kind of job creation scheme for the otherwise-unemployable, I suppose?

9 comments:

  1. Avoiding low-flying geese is easy, you just hover about fifty feet up in the air and they sail well beneath your feet.

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  2. Effing risk assessments. It's a whole sodding 'demand' industry and form filling exercise consuming endless hours of teaching time trying to think what might, maybe could possibly go wrong.

    When I was at secondary school we went on a week-long trip to the Malham Tarn area and actually stood almost on the Malham Cove cliff edge looking down 300 feet. Jeez, they would have a fit nowadays that we were a) on a cliff, b) in the open air and c) not wearing suitable headwear/footwear with parachutes and full training how to deploy them, etc.

    Plus we skived off and smoked, drank cider and chatted up the local girls.

    But, amazingly, we all survived, which I suppose was why we never worried about any of it overmuch.

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  3. Only one person mentioned the risk of "bird poo" or goose shit, to use the technical term. Very slippy, therefore a potential slip hazard and slipping can cause injury. If only geese would make use of the designated toilet area clearly marked out with cones and hazard tape.
    The main hazard is the flock of greedy contingency-fee vultures (aka lawyers) overhead.

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  4. I seem to recall a school 'Risk Assessment' that decided a trip to the Natural History Museum in London was 'too risky' - because paedophiles knew school trips went there, and would be lurking.

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  5. XX Dizzy said...
    When I was at secondary school we went on a week-long trip to the Malham Tarn area XX

    A WEEK!!?? Bleeding HEL!

    You win the second or third prize then?

    We got the first prize and only got a day sentence.

    AND to get from that bastarding lime stone pavement, we climbes all 300 feet down the scree slope at the side!

    "Teachers" today would have you wearing harness and safety helmets to see bloody photographs of the place.

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  6. "...consuming endless hours of teaching time trying to think what might, maybe could possibly go wrong."

    And not just teaching; this pernicious culture now permeates everything.

    "Only one person mentioned the risk of "bird poo" or goose shit, to use the technical term. Very slippy..."

    And deposited in huge quantities!

    "I seem to recall a school 'Risk Assessment' that decided a trip to the Natural History Museum in London was 'too risky' - because paedophiles knew school trips went there, and would be lurking."

    /facepalm

    "A WEEK!!?? Bleeding HEL!"

    Most school trips were a day trip when I was at school, but the 'adventure' type ones were always a long weekend or a week. Wales was a popular venue.

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  7. I wonder where we would be if Health and Safety had always been applied.
    I am thinking Madame Curie discovering radium, the building of St Paul's Cathedral and Barnes Wallis' bouncing bomb experiments....

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  8. When I was a child in the 1970s and bomb scares were common at schools (all fake AFAIK), we had a trip to some London museum. All the kids went except one who declined due the IRA bomb threat.

    How we all ridiculed that kid at the time. How he got his revenge on us!

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  9. "Muslims would attack their own mosque? "

    Er, they do it all the time in places like the 'Stans. Apparently in the RoP you can easily be in the wrong version, chapter, or band, or whatever they call it.

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