Sunday 19 June 2011

As Headlines Go, Not As Scary As ‘Hungry Velociraptors Are Escaping From Jurassic Park’…

Amorous peacocks are escaping from Holland Park to hunt for a mate.
Today residents were warned not to approach them and drivers were urged to be vigilant.
Wha..?

They’re just birds! Yes, I wouldn’t like to drive round a corner and find one in the road, but we aren’t talking about cassowarys here…

Oh, wait. Maybe we are?
Pc Angus Angus (Ed: whut?), of Kensington and Chelsea parks police, said: "Peacocks are highly strung and have no road sense. You can't herd or chase them as they get frantic. You can't pick them up because they have huge talons and the wings can cause injury."
‘Huge talons’?

My god, look at those...wait, that's not a peacock.


Ah, that's better.

"We get them back by leaving a peanut trail."
How do you get back your missing PCSOs, PC Angus? Leave a trail of doughnuts?

6 comments:

  1. Not as scary as GIANT NAZI COWS either.

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  2. Having been repeatedly attacked by a bolshie cockerel in a friends chicken shed, I probably wouldn't be too keen on a swipe from the feet shown in the second picture!

    As for the those in the first....

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  3. Angus Angus? What parent calls their kid the same name twice? Oh yes Gary and Phil Nevilles dad is called.....Neville Neville.
    Jaded
    PS I much prefer a bacon sandwich to doughnuts if you want to lure me somewhere...

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  4. Can get quite randy, can peacocks. They'll display to anything. I remember seeing an ordinary domestic hen skidding round the side of a country house, pure terror on her face. Just feet behind, gaining with every long stride like the 6-million-dollar- man, a meaningful leer on his face, was a peacock that just minutes earlier had been shaking out his tail feathers, trying to seduce my car. It wasn't his talons she was running away from.

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  5. Captain Haddock19 June 2011 at 18:52

    "How do you get back your missing PCSOs, PC Angus" ?

    Do Kensington & Chelsea Parks Police have PCSO's ?

    I thought they were PCSO's ..

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  6. "Not as scary as GIANT NAZI COWS either."

    Well, almost nothing is... ;)

    "Having been repeatedly attacked by a bolshie cockerel in a friends chicken shed.."

    Yes, oddly enough Saturday's 'Animals Do The Funniest Things!' featured a few aggressive chickens AND a peacock!

    "Angus Angus? What parent calls their kid the same name twice?"

    Someone with no imagination?

    "Can get quite randy, can peacocks. They'll display to anything."

    They are beautiful birds. I can understand why people don't like their calls, though. Earsplitting isn't the word...

    "I thought they were PCSO's .."

    Good point!

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