“Quite High Spirited…”

Ah, yes. The modern term for ‘drunk and aggressive’:

Alan Harris, 39, of Lupin Drive, Springfield, lost his temper when a waiter at the Gulshan Indian restaurant in New Street told him the poppadoms were not free.

Restaurant owner Runu Miah and his waiting staff had to pin Harris to the floor until police came to arrest him.

And now his poppadums will incur a delivery charge:

At Chelmsford Magistrates Court Judge David Cooper imposed a six-month ban from all pubs and clubs in the UK.

Bit harsh?

Well, as usual, it’s nowhere near his first offence:

Harris, who has a string of convictions including assaulting a police officer, told the Chronicle: "I won't be going into pubs or clubs now. The implications are too big for me. They're absolutely massive.

"I support West Ham and had been quite high-spirited when I visited Gulshan in February because they had won against Millwall.

"Basically I had a drunken disagreement and we came to blows, so I got arrested and they charged me for a public order offence. It was totally stupid."

Yes. Yes, it was. Also criminal.