Why Didn't He Just Write A Letter Of Confession and Apology?

A pub landlord who said he fought off four muggers while holding fish and chips has been fined for lying to officers, police said.

John Wood, 37, said he was stabbed with a screwdriver near Frank's fish and chip shop in Wisbech, Cambridgeshire. He was fined £80 for wasting police time, Cambridgeshire Police said.

Seems a bit harsh.

A teenager who put a man through two months of torment by falsely accusing him of rape has been spared jail.

Sophie Hooper, 19, told police she had been forced to have sex against her will with a man she had only just met in the pub.

But two months later her conscience got the better of her and she wrote a letter to the police confessing she had lied about the allegations.

*sighs*

He added that Hooper had just come out of a difficult period of adolescence and her mental health was far from robust.

And she's just 'become a mum'. Lovely!

Meanwhile, a story that - for me, at least - had the unmistakable aroma of poisson from the very start looks as though it might be unravelling:

Police are investigating a theory that the Victoria's Secret worker who suffered horrific acid burns to her face may have inflicted the injuries on herself.

Miss Oni said she is 'really upset' about the allegation. Her family have accused the police of not doing enough to catch the true perpetrator and wasting time by instead focusing on a 'crazy' line of enquiry.

Our very own Tawana Brawley?