Saturday 7 December 2013

"And they'll none of 'em be missed — they'll none of 'em be missed."

Two teenagers sparked a police alert when they...
Brought a gun into school? Took a bit too much of an interest in chemistry?
...wrote a menacing list of schoolmates who “need to die”.
Oh. I guess, these days, the pen keyboard is mightier than the sword...
Worried teachers at Seaford Head School called officers after they discovered the ‘death list’ on Facebook threatening nearly 100 pupils, including disabled children.
Posted last weekend, the scrawled paper message – entitled “People Who Need To Die” – was widely shared by youngsters online.
Which suggests they weren't too concerned about it. But the supposed 'adults' went into panic mode, of course:
Concerned staff alerted Sussex Police, who sent an officer into school on Monday to interview the two Year 11 students responsible. All pupils at the school were spoken to by teachers while parents were reassured that no children were in danger.
/facepalm
One parent said: “It’s scary when you hear your child talking about a death list going around.
“I think the teachers and the police were right to take it seriously and find out what was going on – you never know what might happen.
“It must be horrible for the kids on that bit of paper. What a nasty thing to write.”
*despairing sigh*
The school said further investigations would determine whether the two authors of the list would be charged with any crime.
*hurls PC out of window*

10 comments:

  1. A careless mistake; the authors should have put their own names first, in which case they would have been fast-tracked into counselling and acquired enough 'vulnerability' to trump any subsequent actions by authority.

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  2. I do not share the popular notion that all 650 MPs need to be hanged. Rather, I think that the warning would be best administered by publicly beheading 2% of them, after full dragging on hurdles and sale of TV rights.

    My hobby is compiling that little list, the names change round. I award extra points for being educated at Balliol as I believe the devil's belly button is there.

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  3. The Blocked Dwarf7 December 2013 at 10:11

    "“It must be horrible for the kids on that bit of paper"

    Indeed. The School MUST provide Trauma Counseling for the VICTIMS! Also I suggest the parents of the VICTIMS of this HATE CRIME contact their local SpuriousClaimsRus regarding compensation.

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  4. Got to get them used to the idea as early as possible that writing their thoughts down is now a Police Matter.

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  5. Only 100?

    Fuckin amateures. Mine was at LEAST a thousand long.

    Begining with the Maths teacherette. And then, my so called Mother and Father had high value life insurance.

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  6. If I was a prospective parent looking to place a child in a school I would seriously question whether I would want my child educated in school operated by such a group of neurotic and retarded teachers.

    What hope to future generations have when all they have to aspire to is the standards set by these cretins?

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  7. Oh, for Suck's Fake, haven't these so-called adults anything better to do with their time?
    And we are paying them to come up with this sort of intellectual excreta.

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  8. Bunny

    Mr Blocked Dwarf has missed out on a option for the little dears who have been included in the list, that is exam results being weighted in their favour to allow for the stress they have suffered by being on the list! Free grade A marks for everyone sitting GCSEs that year!

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  9. I award extra points for being educated at Balliol as I believe the devil's belly button is there.

    Interesting. A more widespread belief is that the spawn of Satan in the form of Tony Blair is next door in St John's.

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  10. "...and acquired enough 'vulnerability' to trump any subsequent actions by authority."

    Indeed... :/

    "... after full dragging on hurdles and sale of TV rights."

    It'd be bigger than 'X Factor'!

    "Got to get them used to the idea as early as possible that writing their thoughts down is now a Police Matter."

    As we saw yesterday, that idea's firmly entrenched now.

    "A more widespread belief is that the spawn of Satan in the form of Tony Blair is next door in St John's. "

    :D

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