Sunday 27 April 2014

Champion, The Mystery Horse!

"Like a streak of lightning flashing cross the sky"... well, more the M62, actually:
Student Olivia Wynn took a picture of the galloping animal from the passenger seat of the car she was driving back from a day trip in York in with her mum, Deborah just by junction 27 near Birstall, West Yorkshire.
All lanes were affected for almost one hour when the horse hurtled through a fence near junction 28 in Tingley and attempted to travel the wrong way along the east-bound side at evening rush hour.
Police say they have no idea where the animal came from, or who it belonged to...
 Gosh, what a puzzle! Can't you check the tattoo or microchip?

No. Silly question, I guess.
Inspector David Peach, of West Yorkshire Police, said: 'We tried to corral the horse to safety but whilst it had been running free, it had caused severe damage to its leg and when it was finally rescued, it was in considerable distress.
'The only humane option was to put it down. The only right thing to do was to put it out of its misery.'
One assumes that, because you were presumably closer, you managed to accomplish this with less than nineteen bullets this time?
In a Twitter alert, West Yorkshire Police RPU, who were called to the scene following calls from several bewildered motorists, said that it was 'running all over the place' and warned drivers to be careful. Police officers stopped lanes and slowed traffic until they were able to approach the horse.
They are now trying to arrange for repairs to be made to the fence to prevent it from escaping again.
Wha..?

Hang on, I thought you said you'd no idea where it came from? And that you destroyed it?

17 comments:

  1. 'To prevent it escaping again' - I suppose there is a precedent...

    When the wind whistles cold on the moor of the night.
    All along, down along, out along lea.
    Tom Pearce's old mare doth appear ghastly white,
    With Bill Brewer, Jan Stewer, Peter Gurney,
    Peter Davy, Dan'l Whiddon, Harry Hawke,
    Old Uncle Tom Cobley and all,
    Old Uncle Tom Cobley and all.

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  2. The blocked Dwarf27 April 2014 at 12:30

    "to prevent it from escaping again."

    A horse with Christ like abilities? I've heard of flogging a dead horse but not of a deaded horse escaping a field unless it was cunningly disguised as a pot of glue or a Tesco Lasagne...

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  3. Plod fun is now a serious fund raiser. Yorkshire's elite can bid for Motorway Safari tickets and these guarantee a roof place on plod's 4X4, from which position agricultural stock can be blasted in complete safety.

    NB Each safari is terminated in accordance with the North Yorkshire Police Policy For Humane Destruction. Evening marksmen ensure that dying animals are fully destroyed by Gatling gun.

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  4. Gatling gun?

    Nah, Minigun!

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  5. Of course they want to stop it getting out again. It knows who killed it. Next time, no more mister nice horse!

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  6. Wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble MTG

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  7. I know (from recent experience involving sheep in a field next to my garden) that there is an absolute statutory duty (The Animals Act 1971) on keepers of livestock to prevent straying. The farmer who kept the sheep next to me found out the expensive way (by obliging me to take him to court) that the costs caused by his straying animals fell on him. Anybody who suffered financially quantifiable loss arising from this incident is entitled to recover it from the person who kept (or failed to keep) the horse in the field.

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  8. Anonymous wibbler @ 13:52

    Healthy folk certainly enjoy a modicum of post-coital euphoria, and I have no trouble with that.

    Rubbing yourself against my comments may be an equivalent gratification but 14 wibbles on the trot are hallmarks of a pathological frotteur, Sir.


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  9. @Anon 13:57

    It would amuse me to watch you try and take the most likely owner of this horse to court. If you managed to find anyone who was prepared to admit ownership (unlike your otherwise law abiding neighbour farmer, all the people you ask about this horse will say 'Nothing to do with me guv'), serving papers on them without having your car mysteriously catch on fire would in itself be an achievement. If you got beyond that I suspect you would be visited by various 'acquaintances' of the owner and 'convinced' to drop the case.

    The police would of course not want to get involved - 'Its a civil case sir, nothing to do with us'

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  10. I bet you think you are so funny and clever Melvin.A bit sad in reality though.
    Jaded

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  11. Wit with a soupçon of tragedy, Jaded?
    Clever is a relative term and I must place myself on the lower end of its spectrum, having spent the last two hours frantically searching for some token of mutual admiration.

    Check the comments tomorrow, dear.

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  12. Oooooh get her!

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  13. I remember Champion the Wonder Horse.

    I am now old enough to wake up each morning thinking 'What, again?'

    On the other had, I have been searching for a good new tale to tell and the idea of a vengeful ghost horse held in by a fence even though nobody knows where it came from is a damn good one.

    Thanks for the inspiration, even though it did come with a spiked mortality reminder!

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  14. XX from the passenger seat of the car she was driving XX

    I prefer to drive from the drivers seat, but....women drivers and all that, you can never tell WHAT they will do.

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  15. Scraping the bottom of the barrel here Julia.There must be better anti-police stories than this knocking around.Horse gets loose,might be dead,might not.Two different police departments get the details wrong.Who cares?
    SACK THEM ALL AND THEY SHOULD LOSE THEIR GOLD-PLATED PENSIONS AS WELL!!!
    Jaded

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  16. "I suppose there is a precedent.."

    Heh!

    "Of course they want to stop it getting out again. It knows who killed it. Next time, no more mister nice horse!"

    :D

    "I know (from recent experience involving sheep in a field next to my garden) that there is an absolute statutory duty (The Animals Act 1971) on keepers of livestock to prevent straying."

    Some owners, it seems, are more equal than others...

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  17. "... the idea of a vengeful ghost horse held in by a fence even though nobody knows where it came from is a damn good one."

    Indeed!

    "There must be better anti-police stories than this knocking around."

    Oh, so many stories, so little time!


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