Monday, 22 June 2015

Don’t Order The ‘Special Sauce’, Whatever You Do…

The manager of a sports shop was shocked to see a man pleasuring himself among the menswear rails.
Blackburn magistrates heard Shueyb Yusf turned towards the female manager and walked towards her still masturbating.
"She quickly walked round the corner and called security," said Catherine Allan, prosecuting.
Miss Allan said Yusuf had a previous caution for indecent exposure.
Eeeeewwww!
Angela Rossi, defending, said there were mental health issues for her client.
"He is due to start work in a takeaway which his father is opening in a few weeks time," said Miss Rossi.
Sadly, they don’t name it. Shouldn’t Public Health know..?

Update: And I think I'll go topless...
at

6 comments:

  1. Ed P22 June 2015 at 12:28

    Damaging TEN T-shirts is impressive - what stamina!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ted Treen22 June 2015 at 14:16

    "..."He is due to start work in a takeaway..."

    Huh? Come again?






    OK, I'll get my coat...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Fahrenheit21122 June 2015 at 16:45

    Great timing, I've just had a Muslim commenting over at my place moaning that not all Muslims are perverts. I'll refer them to this thread with the words 'are you absolutely sure that Islam isn't overly pervert friendly?'

    For a minority community Islam certainly produces an incredible amount of'bus wankers', rapists, paedophiles indecent exposure merchants and not forgetting the imfamous 'Wanking Muslims of Bradford' like this one http://www.fahrenheit211.net/2014/01/08/from-elsewhere-bradford-it-has-turned-from-the-wool-capital-of-the-world-into-the-land-of-the-masturbating-muslim/

    The Muslims of Britain certainly seem to produce sex offenders in numbers that are way out of proportion to this communities population size.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous22 June 2015 at 22:14

    "The Bolton News understands 10 T-shirts were damaged in the incident."

    ...but they're responding well to counselling

    Jay

    ReplyDelete
  5. Furor Teutonicus24 June 2015 at 16:37

    This kind of behaviour is not at all unusual on the U-Bahn here.

    Either their bollox are very itchy, or they are doing something else.

    Last one I saw got his bollox scrathed for him, at the steel toe capped end of my service boot.

    Funny, he never tried to take it to court.

    ReplyDelete
  6. JuliaM5 July 2015 at 05:39

    "Damaging TEN T-shirts is impressive - what stamina!"

    Quite!

    "Great timing, I've just had a Muslim commenting over at my place moaning that not all Muslims are perverts."

    It's the 99% that seem to be that give the others a bad name...

    "This kind of behaviour is not at all unusual on the U-Bahn here."

    *makes note for future holiday options*

    ReplyDelete