Saturday, 19 December 2015

You Might Not Think It’s A Social Problem….

…but people hassled for change or trying to avoid vomiting, fighting drunks might disagree:
It is cold, it is wet, it is nearly Christmas and in Bournemouth the local council has come up with a new wheeze to torture the homeless.
Yes, that’s mature. Of course, they are just doing it because they are big meanie poopyheads, aren’t they?
Apparently responding to complaints from commuters who felt “intimidated” by homeless people congregating outside the railway station, the council hit upon all-night bagpipes as a solution.
Nice use of scare quotes. I’m guessing the sight of aggressive beggars doesn’t intimidate you. You must be soooooo brave.
When 4,000 – presumably less easily intimidated – people signed a petition branding the measure inhumane, the authority listened.
And it responded, by changing the record to Alvin and the Chipmunks’ uniquely eardrum-needling take on “All I Want For Christmas Is You”.
Hahahahahahaha! Top trolling, Bournemouth Council!
This is not some sub-Orwellian joke. It happened. Just like those anti-homeless spikes that appeared outside a new block of flats in London and Selfridges in Manchester, and many other places besides. It takes a special kind of bureaucratic mind to see a social problem, such as growing numbers of people with nowhere to go but the streets, and then find a way to make matters worse for them.
Because being aggressively panhandled for change by a drunk or druggie (or even someone who isn’t actually homeless at all) isn’t a social problem, I suppose?
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5 comments:

  1. John M19 December 2015 at 13:41

    I live in Bournemouth. These cosmopolitan lefty London journos know absolutely bugger all about twhat they're talking about.

    As a seaside resort Bournemouth has more than it's fair share of beggars. There are more than enough spaces in hostels for them, and yet still they linger around the station, where they hassle people, beg, smell, make the place look bad, thieve from the local Asda and - of course - procure drugs.

    Frankly playing bagpipes is a humane solution. I would spray the place with anthrax at night personally.

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  2. Anonymous19 December 2015 at 15:52

    Try Sarin.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Uncle Badger19 December 2015 at 16:09

    Note the 'increasing problem' of homelessness. Isn't it strange how this 'problem' only 'increases' when we aren't benefiting from the wise and generous rule of a Labour government?

    Cardboard box manufacturers and breeders of ratty-looking dogs (string optional) must rejoice when Labour wins an election.

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  4. Lynne at Counting Cats26 December 2015 at 21:52

    Aspiring Grauniad hack anyone?

    ReplyDelete
  5. JuliaM28 December 2015 at 07:08

    "These cosmopolitan lefty London journos know absolutely bugger all about twhat they're talking about."

    Now, that's a given!

    "Isn't it strange how this 'problem' only 'increases' when we aren't benefiting from the wise and generous rule of a Labour government?"

    It's almost predictable...

    "Aspiring Grauniad hack anyone?"

    Why not? 'AutoTrader's' still (just) profitable enough... ;)

    ReplyDelete