If They Gave An Award For Crass, Self-Absorbed Statements In Newspaper Articles...

...then I think this one would win hands down:

Reece’s dad, Steve Clarke, has spoken of his horror when he heard Reece was involved in this second crash.

For several heart-stopping minutes, Mr Clarke, 55, of Thorpe Hall Close, believed his son had been injured in another shocking accident. He said: “One of Reece’s carers called me and said Reece had had an accident.

“I was round the corner so I dashed down there thinking all the time about what might have happened to him.

“I got there before the ambulance and the police and could see someone had been run over.

“I thought it was Reece.

“I was so relieved to find him still sitting in the car.”

 Pity about the 100 year old grandmother who'd been mowed down, but hey, your son's ok!

“The carer driving the car was from an agency. She’d been with us five or six times so she was used to the car. It was just a terrible accident.”

Well, no. It was careless driving:

Judge Ian Graham, sentencing, said Lyons “didn’t park in a proper parking bay” and left the vehicle’s engine on, in gear and in automatic mode with the handbrake on as she left the vehicle to check the petrol cap.

He said whether it was by a “pure accident or whether you touched the wrong pedal by mistake”, her foot touched the accelerator as she got back into the van and the handbrake was overridden.

“You didn’t act properly in stopping the vehicle, in finding the brake, and I expect you panicked,” he said.

What did she get? Suspended sentence. Of course.