Now Even Foxes Are Using Knives!

Bryony October found Alan, her neighbour’s two-year-old cat, in North Gardens, Brighton, on Monday evening.

The 38-year-old, who had known the cat since he was a kitten, said: “He was lying about a metre from my front door and looked like he was asleep so I shouted his name, but as I got closer I saw the wound and realised he was dead.

“We went to the vet afterwards and an autopsy showed it was a knife wound that had punctured his lung.”

Hmmm.

Bryony reported the stabbing to Sussex Police.

A police spokesman said: “The informant was advised there are no further lines of enquiry, however anyone with any information about this, or similar incidents, is asked to email 101@sussex.pnn.police.uk or call 101 quoting Operation Diverge.

“Police are investigating a number of reports of cat deaths and injuries in Brighton, and are reviewing information gained from a number of sources.”

Probably a whole team engaged in trying to find a plausible reason why foxes are now arming themselves like promising footballers and aspiring rappers...