Monday 4 March 2019

A Blast From The Past…

A man who died after being stabbed in Southend has been described as "cheeky, ambitious, and extremely creative".
Immediately, alarm bells are ringing...
Courtney Valentine-Brown...
Hmmm. That name seems strangely familiar, somehow.
...who was 36 and from Southend, was found injured at an address in Roots Hall Drive shortly before midnight on Thursday.
*ponders*
In a tribute, his family said: “We are heartbroken over the murder of our dear son, brother, uncle and cousin who was tragically taken away from us prematurely.
“He was ambitious, cheeky and extremely creative with his whole future ahead of him despite his life challenges.”
Ah! *snaps fingers* It's just come back to me.

And since when did you need to 'be creative' to have 'a whole future ahead of you' as a drug dealer?

6 comments:

  1. ...with his whole future ahead of him ...

    He's 36 FFS, not wet from the womb. Not so very long ago we expected people to have actually achieved something by 36.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ... as opposed to having his whole future behind him, presumably.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sentenced to over 5 years in June 2016 and dead in a squat or somewhere less that 3 years later. A real loss to mankind.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Never, ever be a cheeky chappy or a lovable rogue. Especially not with a heart of gold.

    It's a death sentence.

    ReplyDelete
  5. "Cheeky"
    A word supposed to make us think of a cherubic angel, always quick with a quip.
    What it actually means is he was a horrendous **** ***** with a **** who **** **** and probably **** ******

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Not so very long ago we expected people to have actually achieved something by 36."

    He does have an impressive record. Albeit a criminal one.

    "Sentenced to over 5 years in June 2016 and dead in a squat or somewhere less that 3 years later. A real loss to mankind."

    Better not point that out to the grieving relatives, or they'll be onto Compo Is Us lawyers before you can say 'duty of care'....

    "What it actually means is he was a horrendous **** ***** with a **** who **** **** and probably **** ******"

    That's forever now how I'll translate it!

    ReplyDelete