"The only concern expressed by the despicable owners of this animal was that we had been hitting their dog."
Of course! It's typical in these cases.
Perhaps the police would have come quicker if the owner and the helpful bystanders had been laying into the owners with punches and kicks from steel-toecapped boots instead?
"An officer from the West Midlands Police Dangerous Dog Unit told me 'American XL Bullys are flavour of the month right now'," Alan said.
Imagine that. The problem is so bad some farces are actually setting up units...
"I predict that over the next 12 to 18 months we will see a massive rise in the number of attacks and fatalities as a result of unscrupulous breeding of these dogs.
"It is also worth noting that as well as an XL Bully there is an XXL Bully. No doubt someone somewhere is working on the creation of a triple XXXL bully."
Like some mad ghetto version of Dr Wu, tinkering with genetic codes the old fashioned way to produce what they need...
"The law needs to be changed to stop breeders from 'tweaking' the DNA of killer dogs and claiming that they are legal breeds."
If only we had lawmakers worthy of the name...
Bringing in Clarkson's Law could stop this sort of thing. All it takes is the politicians to stop arguing about whether a woman can have a penis, get off their manginas, and start showing concern for human life.
ReplyDeleteIf you are worried about the possibility of being attacked by a dog, I suggest carrying a 550mm x 4.8mm or 7.6mm cable tie with you. Practice puttting one on something like a table leg or a bannister rail so you know how they work. It can be kept coiled up in your pocket or bag. You will will be in a state of panic during the attack and your dog/child will be screaming, so you will need to keep a clear head which will not be easy. Once the cable tie is pulled as tight as you can, it will need something both sharp and strong to cut it off, and this will give you time to get away.
ReplyDeleteWe need more laws? There are already laws that we don't enforce that cover this issue. Our useless plod and courts just need to enforce them.
ReplyDeleteLord T,
ReplyDeleteClarkson's Law, which suggests that any dog is put down and then followed by the dog's owner, after it had attacked a human, especially a child, was suggested, probably tongue in cheek, by Jeremy Clarkson. As someone who has seen the effects of a niece being attacked by a dog owned by someone who couldn't give a monkeys, I regret that this suggestion will never make it on to the statute books.
"... and start showing concern for human life."
ReplyDeleteAt the moment, they seem obsessed with political life. Their own.
"I suggest carrying a 550mm x 4.8mm or 7.6mm cable tie with you."
I can't thread the end through the first time every time when I'm just securing my roses to the climbing frame! And the roses aren't struggling...
" Our useless plod and courts just need to enforce them."
Spot on!
"As someone who has seen the effects of a niece being attacked by a dog owned by someone who couldn't give a monkeys..."
I can see why they don't. There's never any consequences for them, and when their mutt's had the vet's needle, what to stop them buying a new weapon?