It is a far cry from the world of hard-living fictional detectives like Gene Hunt from Life on Mars, but modern day police officers are being issued with "lifestyle guides", suggesting bedtime routines and healthy eating options.GAH!
Among the pearls of wisdom offered in the documents are that officers should assist their spouses with household chores and do activities such as gardening and dancing to keep fit.Producing these guidelines and endless emails is all very well, but at least they aren’t too time-consuming for the front-line, as I expect most will go straight in the bin, whether actual or virtual.
The guides even offer advice on what fillings officers should have in their sandwiches.
But this is a bit less amusing:
One force, Wiltshire, even offers its officers a supermarket tour to encourage healthy eating habits. It also gives a presentation to staff, with tips such as using herbs, spices and vinegar to reduce salt use.Seriously? Do the HR people not have anything better to do?
Do the officers?
H/T James Higham via email
"Seriously? Do the HR people not have anything better to do" ?
ReplyDelete"Do the officers" ?
I think you've missed the point here Julia .. someone will gain a promotion from this consignment of geriatric shoe-makers .. and that what matters .. in fact, that's ALL that matters ..
The time, effort & money wasted on it are of no consequence ..
Good post, but cries out for additional Fat Sweaty Coppers
ReplyDeleteReplacing salt intake with vinegar is far more damaging to one's renal system.
ReplyDeleteYou also do not need vinegar to survive, although you don't last long without salt.
How much is this crap costing?
Don't Peelers have truncheon meat in their sandwiches?
ReplyDeleteNot only promotions Haddock, but gongs and knighthoods don't get just handed out you know...
ReplyDeleteHere's hoping it can reduce nasty fat drips from Wiltshire plod sandwiches.
ReplyDeleteEnsuring they do not 'slip' on greasy cell floors is the least that can be done for wrongly arrested civilians.
There he is again....slightly critical police story and he's in like a shot.....
ReplyDeleteDo you think any real police officer wont through these guides in the bin?
Or perhaps MTG, they will roll them up and assault suspects with them?
Jaded
Jaded is correct. I can base my observation on the fate of the Met's Diversity handbook a small 2 ring binder waste of time, money and most normal people's time, the waste paper bins in most nicks were full of them, from individually addressed envelope to bin in about 30 seconds followed by some ripe and very inappropriate language. Diversity co-ordinators and various 'champions' were the only ones who gave a fuck! As the Cap'n says - someone got promoted!
ReplyDeleteThis idea is, as they say, waaay out of left field but how about keeping fit catching some villains?
ReplyDeleteSeriously? Do the HR people not have anything better to do?
ReplyDeleteCLEARLY NOT!
@ Ranter
ReplyDelete"It's somebody else's fault" helped establish that now familiar hallmark of UK police and I am the last person to deny a rightful share of credit to which you are entitled.
MTG,
ReplyDeleteJaded is 'just doing my job, Guv'.
Like the SS, or prostitutes.
English Viking-you are getting as obscure as my mate MTG. Please explain
ReplyDeleteJaded
@ English Viking
ReplyDeleteYou are correct my friend - but I advise caution to avoid traducing police.
Their favourite is to brand critics 'police haters' but I do not hate them. Police are most intolerant of refined contempt and will attack it like frenzied ants.
I have a great contempt for an ineffective public service stuffed to the gunnels with the lazy, the stupid and the corrupt. I never tire of saying so.
Now, if they were to take as much care with the food that the job provides on Mutual Aid/PSU duties...
ReplyDeleteMelvin - you are, if nothing, constant. Respeck!
ReplyDelete"Good post, but cries out for additional Fat Sweaty Coppers"
ReplyDeleteLove that one :)
"Jaded is correct. I can base my observation on the fate of the Met's Diversity handbook a small 2 ring binder..."
If only they just printed this stuff on soft, quilted, absorbent paper, it would be less of a waste...
"Now, if they were to take as much care with the food that the job provides on Mutual Aid/PSU duties..."
Didn't a dodgy choice of sandwich emporium once knock out an entire shift? They should take their own advice!
Jaded,
ReplyDeleteI was pointing out the hypocrisy of a person employed by the State to implement its draconian/loony ideas, who go on to say that they completely disagree with those policies, but take the cash and implement them anyway (usually with great gusto), and when confronted with the fact that they suspend their own 'morality' in exchange for other people's cash (the very people they victimise, bully and harass, BTW) they invariably bleat 'Just doin' me job, Guv'.
Like the SS. Just followin' orders, mate.
I tried being a rebel but the "new labour" creed has completely taken over the police.I have the odd little victory but I can't win the war on political correctness.
ReplyDeleteBy the way Julia-this will make you laugh-whilst on patrol on my boroughs sink estate today I saw a banner tied on railings on a busy roundabout.It was on a disgusting old bed sheet and the slogan was sprayed on with a black aerosol can.It read "happy 40th birthday Grandad".
Jaded
Jaded,
ReplyDeleteYou could win. You just choose not to.
Tell them to bollox.
I am the little boy with my finger in the dyke (am I allowed to say that now?). It's a losing battle and saying bollox every now and again to senior officers will only lead me to the dole queue with all the people I harass at the moment.
ReplyDeleteJaded.
To English Viking....armchair general who braveley tells coppers how they should stand up against the system and risk the sack....nah.
ReplyDeletePolicing is a job to me...nothing else. Does a worker at Morrisons who doesn't like where there apples come from go and make a stand against the company...well he can but he may be out of a job.
Your part of that bullying crowd that condemns people for defending themselves. You attack the police but can't abide it when officers defend themselves. Boo Hoo.
Stay in ignorance and spout your stuff...i've got more time for those who do the job and do it to earn money for their families and to keep vulnerable people safe from people wth attitudes such as yours.
You are spouting moral superiority... just like any dictator, religious nut, evil dictator. If you can compare an officer you don't know to a prostitute or the SS, perhaps he can compare you to worse? I think he probably can and probably should.
'Tell them to bollox'....way to win the argument !!!!
ReplyDeleteI've done frontline shiftwork for a long time, in the armed forces and thn the police. I suffer from a variety of illnesses and i put most of them down to stress, eating on the run and lack of proper sleep.
I have never had any guidance on best way to cope and if there is such a thing together with dietary advice then why should it not be published? Why bother with psychologists...just tell people to pull themselves together. Tell the troops coming back from war to get on with it and get over themselves.
Why bother teaching people to drive and pass a test with theory... just nannying again, chuck them the keys and say crack on.
If the guidance helps some officers improve their health, fitness and mental outlook....what is the problem? Open your mind a bit and stop being so cynical.
Anon 9:28
ReplyDeleteI would not lower myself to be a Police officer.
When you say 'defending yourself', do you mean like the Old Bill were with Menezes, or Tomlinson?
Prick. Typical mouthy, self-obsessed, self-entitled copper.
Jaded,
Then you prove my point; you are prepared to do things, often to other people, that you do not agree with, because if you speak out about it or refuse to do it you fear the sack
You suspend your conscience in exchange for money.
Anon 9:40
My heart bleeds. Still, a couple more years of bacon sarnies and shaking down pimps, and you can retire at 50 and start living the good life, eh?
English Viking,are you Melvins younger brother?.The stupid more ignorant one?
ReplyDeleteI assume you have never worked for a disciplined organisation (keyboard warrior or armchair General doesn't count).Unfortunately I have to do as I am told within regulations.If we were given free rein then you would be the first one moaning as I would turn into Judge Dredd.
Jaded
Jaded,
ReplyDeletePeople who want to become PCSO's are like the people who want to become football referees, even linesmen.
Sad, inadequate individuals with a persecution complex.
I'm not a PCSO,referee or linesman.
ReplyDeleteWhat's the bravest thing you've ever done? Apart from commenting on websites?Changing the toner in your photo-copier?My hero.
Jaded PC