A teenager was left stunned after her little brother was attacked ...by a pet pig.How exactly did their puppy ‘go to investigate’? Surely, it was safely leashed, like the woman’s pig?
Kathryn Clark and five-year-old Robert were on the recreation ground near Clacton Leisure Centre when they were surprised to see a woman taking the pet porker for a walk.
But when their ten-month-old poodle puppy went to investigate, all hell broke loose.
“He went over to play with the pig, but the woman went crazy,” said Kathryn, 19.Well, love, it looks like your dog started it. Perhaps if you’d had him under control, this wouldn’t have happened?
“The owner kicked my dog and the pig tried to attack my little brother.
“The pig was making really weird noises.
“Robert only went over to get our dog, but the woman started hurling abuse at us and the pig went for him.
“Luckily, the pig was on a lead and it missed Robert. But it could have flattened him and caused some real damage.”
She claims the bad-tempered hog is a menace and a danger to the public.Whereas her puppy? Wouldn’t hurt a fly. And if others aren’t so keen on it jumping up with muddy paws at them, well, so what? Innit!
"It’s ridiculous,” said the Blockbuster video store worker.
So, what are the rules with pigs, anyway?
If you want to keep a pig, you must register with the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs.Is there any indication this lady hasn’t done just that? None whatsoever.
You also have to apply for a special pig walking licence, and get the route officially approved, to prevent the risk of spreading diseases.
But the last word should surely go to the chubby chav:
Kathryn says the animal that attacked her brother should be put down.Translation: “When I want to do something, it’s OK. Sod everyone else! Where’s my compo!”
She said: “How many kids will see a pig and want to go stroke it?”
“I’m all for people having weird pets – I’ve got a snake. But a dangerous pig that attacks small children is wrong.
“I’d like to see her licence revoked and that pig destroyed.”
"How many kids will see a pig and want to go stroke it"
ReplyDeleteNone, I would imagine; they're more likely to run away from it, never having seen one before. I like pigs (having been in the business in the past) but would never think of stroking one. But then she does work in a video shop.
I don't think the dawg looked happy sitting next to the pig....oh.
ReplyDeleteLove the headline. Ham-bushed BWahahaha
I can only assume we're talking about one of the toy breeds? Vietnamese pot bellied or something. Do they 'go' for people? Seems unlikely.
ReplyDeleteI did like the "making really weird noises" remark, though. Townies, huh.
Erm, the 2nd anon was me. Google playing up or something?
ReplyDeleteRoue le Jour
I presume we're talking about one of the toy breeds, Vietnamese pot bellied or something. Do they 'go' for people? Seems unlikely.
ReplyDeleteAnd that 'really weird noise' would be squealing, love. It's the noise pigs make.
(Oops - 'NoScript' on)
disappointed when i saw the headline thought it was John Prescott and Jacqui Smith having a death match.
ReplyDeleteI thought it was a bust up between Pickles and Soames.
ReplyDeleteFrom the readers' comments:
ReplyDelete"Probably the poor pig has had bad experiences with dogs, and its owner knows that. If so, that is why the pair of them went ape."
Gordon Bennett! (Or as we classical music aficionados always say, Richard Rodney Bennett!)
>Anonymous said...
ReplyDelete"How many kids will see a pig and want to go stroke it"
Guilty as charged. I was 22 at the time and she was a flatmate.
I would also like you to take many more offences into consideration.
Not surprising. Chavs are hardly the most rashernal of people, are they...
ReplyDeleteEvil laff.
I think our host needs to do some joke control around here. C'mon, Julia, chop chop.
ReplyDelete"It’s ridiculous,” said the Blockbuster video store worker.
ReplyDeleteSays it all really ...
And leaves one wondering whether her parents are complying with DEFRA Regs when taking her out in public ?
I'll bet the pig is house-trained as well, and doesn't go pissing and crapping all over the place...
ReplyDeleteDoesn't look like apoodle to me
ReplyDeleteIt's a pig-eat-dog world out there.
ReplyDelete" But then she does work in a video shop."
ReplyDeleteSNORK!
"I presume we're talking about one of the toy breeds, Vietnamese pot bellied or something."
She says not. Though how she's accepted as an expert pig identifier, I couldn't say.
"disappointed when i saw the headline thought it was John Prescott and Jacqui Smith having a death match."
I'm glad you said 'deathmatch' and not anything else. I had the *mindbleach* ready...
"From the readers' comments..."
Disappointingly, my comment that, as a fellow porker, she should have some fellow-feeling, didn't get through...
"I think our host needs to do some joke control around here."
ReplyDeleteNah, go the whole hog, I'm cool with it... ;)
"It's a pig-eat-dog world out there."
LOL!
Well, as long as you don't mind this place turning into a forum for hamateur comedians.
ReplyDeleteThis is England
ReplyDelete