Tuesday, 31 August 2010

If The 'Daily Mail' Asks A Question...

...the answer is invariably 'No':
Pathologists are investigating whether MI6 spy Gareth Williams could have been the victim of the ‘perfect murder’.

There are no signs of a violent struggle on the body of the cipher and codes specialist and it is possible that the cause of his death will never be fully discovered.

Doctors examining the body of the 31-year-old for clues are focusing on any evidence which would suggest a professional hit and are scrutinising the area around his neck, sources said.
Surely the perfect murder is one that never appears to be a murder? In which case, stuffing his body into a holdall and leaving it is the bath rather defeats the object, I'd say...

Clearly, I should have gone into professional assassination, as it obviously has lax professional standards and tolerates sloppy work.

Or maybe journalism...
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6 comments:

  1. NickM31 August 2010 at 08:53

    Is the Mail suggesting the Met calls in Jonathan Creek?

    It is though, in a sense, the perfect murder - for lurid tabloid guesswork. Given the nature of the man's job very little real information will come out so it's time for the gentlemen of the press to do what they do best - post lager speculation.

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  2. Chuckles31 August 2010 at 09:51

    Worst case of suicide they've ever seen.

    For me, has mental echoes of the Monty Python - 'Were it not for the complete absence of tiny but telltale...'

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  3. MTG31 August 2010 at 10:52

    This was clearly a case of an incompentently assembled detonator leading to an early bath. The smart money was always on the CIA, in the study with exploding cigar.

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  4. subrosa31 August 2010 at 12:22

    I read this too Julia and just shook my head in wonder. We'll never know what killed this man but I do wish newspaper would stop making murky suggestions. He has parents and family.

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  5. subrosa31 August 2010 at 12:23

    Newspapers - plural. Ooops.

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  6. JuliaM1 September 2010 at 05:30

    "Is the Mail suggesting the Met calls in Jonathan Creek?"

    He'd have it sewn up in a jiffy, I'm sure...

    "For me, has mental echoes of the Monty Python - 'Were it not for the complete absence of tiny but telltale...'"

    Indeed!

    "We'll never know what killed this man but I do wish newspaper would stop making murky suggestions. He has parents and family."

    They are never going to do that, though. Not while they are being briefed by....someone.

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