Thursday 9 June 2011

Has Someone Cracked The Alchemy Problem?

Not that they are turning lead into gold. They aren’t even turning it into prison sentences.

Following this story, here’s another unlikely lead theft:
A man who admitted stealing lead off a roof claimed to have been tempted while taking part in the daredevil sport of “free running.”
Hah! Nice try!
During the interview, Cooper told police he had originally no intention of taking the valuable metal, and it was his friend who suggested stealing it.
The other man involved in the theft had received a suspended jail sentence at a separate hearing, the court was told.
They won’t fall for th…

Oh:
Yesterday, he was ordered to do 100 hours’ unpaid work in the community.
*sigh*
Jamie Porter, defending, said: “He clearly regrets being involved with people who have a propensity to be involved in criminal acts.
Does he? Because that must be uncomfortable, given he surely must get involved with….err, himself:
The court also heard how Cooper had a past conviction for threatening behaviour.
Shocker…

4 comments:

  1. "“He clearly regrets being involved with people who have a propensity to be involved in criminal acts.” "

    He fell in with the wrong crowd? Of Free Runners?? The local chapter of the Hells Parkourists ???!

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  2. I recommend a "Suspended Sentence" where he is strung up and the lead he stole is hung from his goolies...

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  3. This X amount of hours of unpaid work, of which we are hearing so much of... how is that coordinated then, and what does this "work" consist of?

    Surely someone must be paid to supervise and direct such "Work" the criminals arn't going round knocking on doors at random, introducing themselves as convicted felons and offering to wash windows, clean the dishes or vacuum the carpets are they?

    Isn't this just a new name for Community Service Order? of which those sentenced to them ignored outright, and with practically no comeback at all?

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  4. "He fell in with the wrong crowd? Of Free Runners?? "

    They drove him up the wall...

    "...and the lead he stole is hung from his goolies..."

    :D

    "Isn't this just a new name for Community Service Order?"

    Yup. And it no doubt employs just as many people to administer as if they'd got a proper sentence.

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