Wednesday, 15 May 2013

Chutzpah Award Of 2013 – Early Front Runner

Terrence Heightley, 38, from Brighton, was released from Lewes Prison on April 22 after serving half of a four-year sentence for a street robbery.
He is in the process of applying for Employment and Support Allowance – a benefit that offers financial support to people who are disabled or too ill to work – due to his heroin addiction.
But he claims the application process is taking too long and he has no money to eat or live.
Where’s my tiny violin? No! Wait. Still too big.

I need a nano-violin!
As a result, he said he has identified potential houses to burgle in Brighton as a “last resort to survive”.
”… they’ve shoved me in the YMCA with drug addicts and criminals and it’s making everything so difficult.”
But…you’re a drug addict and criminal. Why shouldn't you be placed with your own kind?
Mr Heightley added: “I regret what happened and don’t feel proud of it, but I’ve gone into prison and been rehabilitated. I just want to get on with my life.”
No you don’t. You expect the taxpayer to fund you to do nothing for the rest of your life. Otherwise you’d be looking for work, not for a handout.
A spokesman from the Department for Work and Pensions said it doesn’t set time limits to approve applications as each one is individual.
He added: “It is only right that we carry out a thorough face-to-face assessment and consider all the medical evidence provided by the claimant before we reach a decision as to whether they are eligible for Employment and Support Allowance or if they should get help to find work.”
Good luck getting anyone to take him on...

And remember, next time you see anguished pleas in the media for people to 'stand up against government cuts to ESA', it's not just used on people with genuine disabilities - it's also lavished on the likes of Terrance.
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10 comments:

  1. Unknown15 May 2013 at 09:42

    "...I’ve gone into prison and been rehabilitated..." and "...identified potential houses to burgle in Brighton..."

    Sounds like that rehabilitation has worked a treat then...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dr Cromarty15 May 2013 at 10:42

    Brighton should be easy to target. All those Eco-loons concentrating on carrying around placentas should be a soft target. Nicking their iPads will be a doddle.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Disenfranchised of Buckingham15 May 2013 at 10:47

    Puzzled.

    2 years in prison and he is a heroin addict?

    Don't tell me they didn't make him do cold turkey for 2 years. If not the prison service is to blame for his current condition.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Macheath15 May 2013 at 11:04

    '...identified potential houses to burgle'

    And that is called asking for Dane-geld [...]
    But we've proved it again and again,
    That if once you have paid him the Dane-geld
    You never get rid of the Dane.
    (Kipling)

    ReplyDelete
  5. AndrewWS15 May 2013 at 13:02

    @ Disenfranchised:

    When I was in AA, there were plently of people in it who had done bird and would tell anyone willing to listen that drugs and booze were dead easy to get hold of inside.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Bucko15 May 2013 at 13:19

    Who gives these cretins newspaper space?

    ReplyDelete
  7. Barman15 May 2013 at 16:59

    I wouldn't let anybody out (especially repeat offenders) that couldn't prove they were able to support themselves on the outside...

    I'd rather pay more tax to keep them inside (in suitably harsh conditions) than have to turn my house into a fortress to protect my loved ones and my belongings...

    ReplyDelete
  8. John Pickworth15 May 2013 at 22:41

    Terrence Heightley is 38 years old. We've given him 11 years of schooling and 2 years all expenses paid in HMP Butlins. He's had 20 years to make something of his life since leaving school. I don't think we should be investing anything further in this dud.

    ReplyDelete
  9. JuliaM16 May 2013 at 05:28

    "Sounds like that rehabilitation has worked a treat then..."

    Well, quite!

    "Brighton should be easy to target. All those Eco-loons concentrating on carrying around placentas..."

    Target-rich environment!

    "And that is called asking for Dane-geld [...]"

    I can think of a few things we could borrow from those times. I doubt they had many recidivists...

    "and would tell anyone willing to listen that drugs and booze were dead easy to get hold of inside."

    Shocker... :/

    ReplyDelete
  10. JuliaM16 May 2013 at 05:29

    "Who gives these cretins newspaper space?"

    Oh, editors must love it!

    "We've given him 11 years of schooling and 2 years all expenses paid in HMP Butlins. He's had 20 years to make something of his life..."

    Time to cut out losses. As Barman points out, why should WE have to worry?

    ReplyDelete