Thursday, 31 October 2013

Pity About The Other 364 Days Of The Year...

It's that time of year again! The time of year when we copy the US, dress up, eat stuff we'd never dream of eating at any other time of the year (pumpkin soup? Err, no, thanks...) and have spooky fun, while...

But wait! Hold up there! Fun? Oh, no. No, no, no, no...

When there's something strange endearingly cute in your neighbourhood, who ya gonna call? The police, of course!


And it's not just them...


Not to be outdone...


Yes, even the turnip-munchers aren't left out...


Well, this spells trouble for Mary Berry and Paul Hollywood...




Do these scare you? Well MAN THE FUCK UP! They're only kids!

Yes, every police Twitterfeed has gone into overdrive, promising dire retribution and the flames of Hell* to anyone who upsets the gentlefolk of the parish on this one night.

Yeah, yeah. Try calling them tomorrow to report ASB. Let me know how it goes, won't you? But I hope you aren't the ones that get arrested...

*sod all, because the lines will be jammed with idiots like they always are...

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8 comments:

  1. Demetrius31 October 2013 at 13:05

    It is really All Souls Day when in happier times we would have remembered and prayed for the deceased of our families. It was essentially the US Media and commerce that turned it into this travesty.

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  2. Fidel Cuntstruck31 October 2013 at 13:14

    Pumpkin Soup ... yep, the clue is in the name

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  3. Anonymous31 October 2013 at 16:19

    I've just been in Sainsburys and they haven't run out of fucking pumpkins - so if you panic bought your one 3 months ago when they first went on display - give your kidz a real treat - let them have an ornage one, not a smelly mouldy green and black one.

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  4. Ian Hills31 October 2013 at 16:44

    "Man the fuck up" is hardly a ladylike exclamation Julia, but I too am getting fed up with topsy-turvy police attitudes.

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  5. MTG31 October 2013 at 18:07

    Plod will get under the skin of any honest citizen, Julia. Benzyl benzoate was once a very effective treatment for scabies but a good Peel is necessary to compromise today's larger parasites.

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  6. Anonymous31 October 2013 at 20:15

    Don't answer the door tonight Melvin,it's that night of the year it's OK to torment the local nutter.
    Jaded

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  7. Anonymous1 November 2013 at 00:06

    You were in a rush to get out on the one night you blend in, WC Jaded. Haste makes for continuity errors in your script fiction, old ghoul.

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  8. JuliaM1 November 2013 at 05:42

    "It is really All Souls Day when in happier times we would have remembered and prayed for the deceased of our families."

    Oh, it's grossly over-commercialised, of course. Just like Christmas.

    "...let them have an ornage one, not a smelly mouldy green and black one."

    :D

    ""Man the fuck up" is hardly a ladylike exclamation Julia..."

    I'm no Obo or DK, but I can bring it when the occasion demands it.. ;)


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