So Very Different From The Home Life Of Our Own Dear Queen..

Andrea Fawcett, prosecuting, said on the night of the incident both parties and other witnesses had been drinking.

“The catalyst for this incident appears to be who had eaten more of the chips than the other person,” said Mrs Fawcett.

“The aggrieved refused to make a statement but it appears that during the row she has picked up a kitchen knife.”

Mrs Fawcett said Clayton held the knife against Mr Hill while shouting at him and then poked him with it.

“Given that a knife was involved the injury is far less serious that it could have been,” said Mrs Fawcett.

You mean, if she hadn't been blind drink, her aim would have been better?

“She has no previous convictions but has a recent caution for possession of a bladed instrument.”

/facepalm

Richard Prew, defending, said his client could remember little about the incident.

“She has some injuries herself which she can’t explain,” said Mr Prew.

When do we stop wasting police and the court's time with this sort of stuff?