Thursday 12 September 2019

Is There Anything In That Bag...

...that'll help if a police helicopter crashes on your pub, then? Or you're lying in a ditch in a crashed car awaiting rescue that never comes?


Naturally, this being Twitter, the mocking was immediate, savage and merciless:






Not that the police will learn anything from it. It's as if Superman constantly forgets he's vulnerable to Kryptonite...

6 comments:

  1. Well I know it's rather stupid, and funny too, but for some years I've carried a substantial first aid kit in my car, and multiple Hi Vis waistcoats. OK, it's mainly to do with a job in the construction industry, but when a car behind me in a queue cannoned forward and shunted the car in front into the back of mine and then into the car in front of me (the driver's foot slipped off the clutch - Oh, and it was a woman, by the way) I was able to kit out the drivers of all 4 cars - to the astonishment of the police and fire brigade when they turned up. I've also got into the habit of carrying a small first aid kit on holiday and when out and about. OK, so it's a couple of antiseptic wipes and a collection of plasters, but it's a start.

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  2. "the mocking was immediate, savage and merciless"
    I give a little giggle of glee when those moments begin. They're the best thing about Twitter

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  3. Good advice...but too little, too late. I never travel to Scotland without my helicopter deflector hat. Neither do I associate with Native dipsomaniacs, who are all at some measurable risk of a bitter plod experience.

    In addition to the Vaseline, vinyl gloves and blow-up doll, do please tell us what other emergency items you keep in your own Grab Bag, Penise.

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  4. Post Brexit Apocolypse, as per yellowhammer.

    Don't forget the little book for translating Scots patter.
    Money might be useful, or maybe some trinkets for barter should society really break down.

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  5. Contrast this hysteria from the police with the shrug and “its part of living in a multi-cultural paradise” when another Islamist blows up a room full of schoolgirls or runs amok on the street stabbing people.

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  6. "...but for some years I've carried a substantial first aid kit in my car, and multiple Hi Vis waistcoats."

    Me too! Well, not the hi-vis. But that's so ubiquitous now, it almost no longer stands out.

    "I give a little giggle of glee when those moments begin. They're the best thing about Twitter"

    Yup! :D

    "Money might be useful, or maybe some trinkets for barter should society really break down."

    I bet there'll soon be an app for it!

    "Contrast this hysteria from the police with the shrug and “its part of living in a multi-cultural paradise” when another Islamist blows up a room full of schoolgirls or runs amok on the street stabbing people."

    Damn good point!

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