Saturday 12 October 2019

So, You're Retiring, Eh?

Here's your signed card from the office, a little gift, ands...oh, would you like a last opportunity to make a statement you didn't have the guts for when you just started in the job?

You would? Splendid!
Food should be banned from public transport to stop people snacking on the go, the Government's outgoing chief medical officer has said in her final report.
One hopes the incoming chief medical officer has noted the scorn poured on this by so many commenters and newspapers...
Dame Sally Davies, nicknamed the nation's 'nanny-in-chief' for her bold public health interventions, today delivers her most radical proposals to date.
When no one needs listen to her any more. Fine. I certainly won't!
'We know that snacking is a cause of excess calories in children and adults,' Dame Sally said. 'Years ago we didn't snack - we sat down and ate. I would stop all food and drink except water on urban public transport.'
Yes, she'll allow you water. How munificent! But who is going to enforce this?
She said it would be up to the Government how this would enforced, but added: 'We are a law abiding nation. The vast majority of people would observe it, as they did the smoking ban.'
That might once have been true. Back when 'no-one snacked on trains' (almost certainly at a time when there were smoking carriages, but never mind...). But if she thinks it's true now, she's lost more than a few marbles.
Boris Johnson is opposed to introducing more levies on items high in salt, fat and sugar. In his Tory leadership campaign he said he would review what he called 'stealth sin taxes'.
We'll see. 

5 comments:

  1. Why do we need an incoming CMO? It seems like the kind of job that could be a abolished without anyone noticing.

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  2. Nothing except water? Not even a dry crust o'bread?

    I shall take my tea on the number 73, and they can pry my thermos flask from my cold, dead hands.

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  3. I would imagine that on a 6 hour train journey, say London to Edinburgh that an infant will need food. Does one ban breastfeeding, or do fellow passengers have to endure the irate screams?

    Ditto rug rats, possibly up to age 15.

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  4. You have to understand that the kind of people that worm their way into very plum public sector jobs imagine themselves to be of superior intelligence. The fact that their pontifications can be so easily shot to pieces by ordinary plebs like us suggests otherwise.

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  5. "It seems like the kind of job that could be a abolished without anyone noticing."

    Well, quite! Plenty of non-salaried kooks willing to write crap about obesity in the 'Guardian' and 'Indy' ....

    "...and they can pry my thermos flask from my cold, dead hands."

    These days, they probably would!

    "Does one ban breastfeeding..."

    That, and diabetics, specifically excused by her. How kind.

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