*blinks*
Bearded Josh Guilder, who has shoulder-length brown hair and wore a blue polo shirt, pleaded guilty to five counts of theft at a hearing at Chelmsford Magistrates’ Court on Wednesday.
The 23-year-old took the dummies from babies around Harlow, Essex, between February 10 and August 7 this year. Describing one of the thefts, prosecutor Jessica Pratt Vivian said Guilder reached into a young girl’s buggy, “took her dummy from her mouth, put it in his pocket and left”.
I do rather feel for his defence here, who is clearly struggling...
Mary Buxton, defending, said Guilder was currently living in a tent and “has never been weaned from dummies”.
This is definitely one to watch.
Guilder was remanded in custody and is due to stand trial for the assault matters at Colchester Magistrates’ Court on October 10.
I'm predicting a mental health defence.
Err. That mental health defence is because he is clearly a nutter and it is the right one.
ReplyDeleteMaybe they should just commit him to Bedlam for life.
ReplyDeleteA penchant for a tit. Perhaps emulating the compulsion of a sovereign who would rather be a tampon, M'lud?
ReplyDelete"Err. That mental health defence is because he is clearly a nutter and it is the right one."
ReplyDeleteOh, indeed!
"Maybe they should just commit him to Bedlam for life."
If only we still had it...
"A penchant for a tit. Perhaps emulating the compulsion of a sovereign who would rather be a tampon, M'lud?"
Ouch! But spot on...