Sore Loser!

Mark Bradford, 46, was furious when he was gunned down in the war simulation by the 13-year-old, and 'lost it' when the schoolboy goaded him over his online death.

Bradford stormed from his bedsit in Budeaux, Plymouth, Devon, and confronted the youngster at the boy's friend's house by placing his hands round the schoolboy's neck.

Ah, well, at least my ineptness at these sort of FPS games will never see me strangled by a lunatic for being better at it than him…

The teenager's mother, 33, said: 'It’s pathetic that a grown man would attack a defenceless child like this.

'If you can’t handle losing to a child then you shouldn’t be playing games.'

Indeed!

Bradford is thought to be a loosely-connected friend of the boy's family.

Hmmm…

Tracey Baker, mitigating, said Bradford, who had mental health issues, 'just lost it'.

Yes, thanks for that, Tracey, it clearly needed the keen skills of a lawyer to tell us that…

And How Do You Propose To ‘Get A Grip’?

Two teenage girls remained in hospital and a third was discharged after all three were gunned down in the street.

A case of ‘Shoot the women first’..?

Detectives hunting for a gunman were understood to be investigating if Thursday's attack was a botched drive-by hit. It was initially believed that only one shot was fired.

Ah. They were just collateral damage, then…

An investigation is being led by Trident detectives, who deal with gang crime in the black community. No arrests have yet been made, police said.

Politicians are, of course, pretty quick to court publicity. You might almost wonder if the gun was a starting pistol:

Karen Buck, MP for Westminster North, expressed her concern as she visited the troubled Mozart Estate where the attack took place.

The Labour politician, who has previously called for crackdowns on knife and gun crime, tweeted: "On Mozart Estate after reports of 3 girls being shot. Desperately worried about local gang and youth violence. We have to get a grip."

Oh, really? How, by shutting down social media, perchance?

”Gentlemen! You can’t fight in here, this is the War Room!”

A human rights conference descended into a brawl within minutes of it being opened by a Labour peer, a court heard.

Shocking and unprecedented?

Well, when you look at the players, suddenly the game becomes clear:

Baroness Uddin, the first female Muslim peer, had been invited to chair the conference by the International Bangladeshi Foundation in July last year.

But the event was abandoned as supporters of the ruling party in Bangladesh, the Awami League, and opposition Bangladesh National Party, clashed.

Oooh, vibrant and diverse!

BNP supporter (Ed: yeah, me too!) Sharef Chowdhury, 44, of Bethnal Green, and Awami League subscriber Montor Ali, 37, of East Ham, admitted affray at Inner London crown court.

And the penalty?

Judge Austin Issard-Davies sentenced Chowdhury and Ali to a community order with 100 hours' unpaid work.

The judge told them: "It is central to democracy that debate can take place free of violence.

"It is disgraceful that at a meeting chaired by a member of the House of Lords, a fracas like this should take place."

You’d think so, but sadly, so many of our ancient political institutions have been ‘improved’ lately, it’s no longer even surprising…

I’m Sure It Isn’t…

A 20-year-old man from Oxford, was kicked and punched by a group of Asian men outside the Shell garage in London Road, Headington, at about 1.30am.

He suffered serious facial injuries and was taken to the John Radcliffe Hospital for treatment, where he is now in a stable condition.

A group of ‘Asian men’, eh? Ninjas?

Police said today that the attack was not being treated as racially motivated.

Even if it later turns out to have been.

Got to keep those statistics down.

Vultures Thwarted As Carcass Regains Life

Strange goings-on over school closures in Bath:

The Schools Forum, which is largely made up of primary and secondary heads and governors, has submitted its response to the consultation exercise over whether to close the Rush Hill school.

Its members have met Bath and North East Somerset Council's cabinet member for early years, children and youth, Councillor Nathan Hartley, and say they were not impressed by what they heard.

They say they are concerned with the way the authority has dealt with the process and said the decision to try to keep Culverhay open was based on "flimsy arguments".

Wait, hang on a minute here. The council is trying to prevent closure of a school, and the school staff are against that?

In a letter to the council on behalf of the forum, chair Libby Lee, who is also the head teacher of Ralph Allen School, said: "We are in shock and disbelief that the current administration have so emotively attached themselves to the single issue of keeping Culverhay open without any seeming regard for the implications on the wider school system, which is drained of resources and facing a crumbling and inefficient estate, apart from limited examples such as Writhlington, Threeways or St Kenya."

Ah. There’s the magic word – ‘resources’.

Ms Lee said the process had been "hurried through" and that the minutes of a forum meeting attended by Mr Hartley did not reflect the strength of feeling of its members.

That’s because that’s not what minutes are for. Rather, they are there as a factual record of who attended and who said what.

She said they had been left "bewildered" by the "poverty of arguments" for keeping the school open, adding that the "council have for some time been in receipt of robust data in relation to the financial impact of keeping Culverhay open and will be aware of the poor standards and difficulty in sustaining a full educational offer there."

Seems to be as if ‘poor standards’ and ‘difficulty in sustaining a full educational offer’ are down to you and your colleagues, not just the council?

She said: "We strongly urge the Liberal Democrats to refine their thinking to include some stronger arguments for the whole.

"At present it appears that dubious arguments are being stacked up to support a decision made in haste and in the interests of pleasing a small interest group in the electorate.

"All of us inherit the consequences of this decision, not just one localised community."

Oh, dear. Had you planned to pick the meat off the bones of this school but then the council decided to resurrect it, to please the ‘customers’? What a shame for you, eh?

Who cares about the parents and what they might want from this service, they are just there to provide job security for teaching staff, aren’t they?

Culverhay chair of governors Gerry Curran said he understood the forum's views, but that the school continued to strive to work with other head teachers.

He said: "It is understandable that head teachers are worried about school funding and their own individual budgets.

"Perhaps some of them have become used to the idea that Culverhay was going to close, which may have released some extra funding, but that is not going to happen and now we all need to move forward together."

Shoo, scavengers! Go find another corpse. This one has life left in it.

WERE R YR KIDZ? LOL!

Lewisham Council spent £1,174.70 texting parents during last month's riots, asking if they knew where their children were.

Sometimes, you read something, and then you have to read it again, because you can’t quite believe what you just read…

This is one of those times.

The 21,660 texts were revealed by cabinet member for children and young people Councillor Helen Klier at a meeting on September 22 following a question by Councillor Duwayne Brooks.

Oh. Him.

This gets better and better, doesn’t it?

She told him: "We asked that parents check they were satisfied they knew the whereabouts of their children at that turbulent time."

Cllr Klier said the texts also informed people of the Summer's Alive programme of activities for youngsters during the school holidays.

*boggle*

Excuse Of The Century!

A hairdresser from Glanaman who was caught over the drink- drive limit has blamed her actions on her daughter's new haircut.

Well, 10 out of 10 for novelty value!

Alison Jayne Garland, 43, said her shock at the shorter style was "the straw that broke the camel's back". And this, along with an argument with her former partner, meant she had to get out of the house — despite having drunk four glasses of wine.

No problem with that, she could have taken the bus, though.

Next Time, Will You Still Hesitate?

A teenage burglar “just, and only just” escaped being locked up after a house was burgled and the occupant’s car was burnt out.

Scott Fitzgerald broke into a property in Herschel Crescent, Littlemore, and took a handbag containing the keys to a Mazda RX8 sports car, later found burnt out in Blackbird Leys.

Oxford Crown Court Recorder Matthew Lowe said he “hesitated long and hard” before imposing a non-custodial sentence on the 19-year-old, who got to the bag through an unlocked kitchen window.

Why?

Lucy Tapper, defending, said her client, of Alice Smith Square in Littlemore, “was very drunk at the time”.

She added: “He’s much the sort of person who could be talked into, led into, that type of offence, rather than instigating it himself”.

Miss Tapper continued: “He is considered to be conscientious, honest, friendly, personable and helpful, so that these offences are out of character.”

Are they? Or are they just his true character showing through?

He added at Friday’s hearing: “You have come very, very close to going through that door to the cells rather than this one [back into court].”

Well, don’t worry, Recorder Lowe, I suspect he’ll be back soon to keep his appointment with that door…

Blog Title Of The Month

...goes to Heresy Corner for this inspired post on George Osborne:

Post Of The Month

Longrider points out our Brave New World.

It's chilling. Truly chilling...

Quote Of The Month

From Angry Exile on Jon Snow's lack of professional detachment:

Veteran Channel 4 newsborg Jon Snow blogs on the eeeevil bankers, and specifically asks why they haven't been arrested, and by extension I imagine charged, tried, found guilty, purged, flayed, subjected to the Pear of Anguish and possibly also the Banana of Discomfort and the whole Fruit Salad of Much Inconvenience, and finally hung, drawn, quartered and buried in five limed graves each. But that may just be the impression I get.

I Think We Can Do Without His ‘Contribution To Society’….

A jealous man who kidnapped his ex-partner off the street and subjected her to a late-night terror ordeal has been jailed for four years.

So, what, less than half that served, I reckon?

Burnley Crown Court heard how Zaid Ahmed, 40, had attacked Kimberley Catlow with a steering lock, made repeated and chilling threats to kill her, and claimed he had killed a former girlfriend.

He ended up barricading the pair of them into his flat and Miss Catlow only escaped after a ‘three-and-half-hour nightmare’ when police arrived.

Ahmed was to claim to police he and Miss Catlow were married under Islamic law.

Riiiiiiight…

Simon Gurney, for Ahmed, said: “Aside from this incident, he has contributed to society. He has always been in employment.”

How nice. I notice he doesn’t say as what, though…

Sentencing, Judge Andrew Woolman said the defendant recognised he had anger and stress-management problems.

No, he doesn’t. He has ‘shouldn’t be at large in society’ problems.

Surely There’s Another, Bigger Mystery Here?

A French farmer who bound an elderly German woman to a ladder before sawing off her limbs while she was still alive has been sentenced to life in prison.

The details that the ‘Mail’ gleefully highlights make depressing reading:

On the day of the murder, she was walking from her home to meet her husband for lunch when she entered onto Bureau's land.

However when she failed to appear he raised the alarm.

Detectives established that Bureau had intercepted her and dragged her into a barn at his farm.

Despite her pleas, he attached her arms and legs to a ladder leaning against a wall next to an old tractor and began by cutting off her fingers one by one .

Using butcher’s knives and a meat cleaver Bureau then cut off her arms and legs.

Bureau later revealed under questioning that the victim was still alive when the defendant beheaded her with the cleaver.

Bureau then put Edith Muhr’s body parts in bags and dumped them in a nearby pond but later recovered them and left them in a field.

Good grief!

And there’s no clear motive:

In a bid to establish Bureau’s motive for killing Edith Muhr, prosecutor Jean-Luc Gadaud told the court: ‘She was everything that he was not- wealthy,intelligent and liked. He was crippled by his indebtedness, shyness and his boring life.

‘She may have crossed his land. It was his territory and he wanted to show that he was the master of his land.

‘She was German. Perhaps it was a symbolic act of vengeance. His father was arrested by the Gestapo in 1944.’

Yeah, I rather think you’re reaching a bit there…

He sentenced him to life imprisonment and told him he would serve at least 20 years.

Bureau himself has so (far) refused to speak about his reasons for torturing and killing Edith Muhr.

The bigger mystery is surely this: This can’t have been his first and only crime of this nature. Can it?

Or have I watched too many episodes of ‘Criminal Minds’?

I Think Residents ‘Understand’ Them Only Too Well….

Barking MP Margaret Hodge has questioned why two homes for young people were allowed to open in the same street.

Did anyone question her about accurately locating Barking on a map? Because I doubt she could do it…

Mrs Hodge spoke at a community meeting which she held last Friday to tackle problems with the unruly behaviour of youths in Strathfield Gardens, Barking.

As reported in last week’s Post, residents have complained about a number of young people who live at the two privately-run homes – Holibrook House, which caters for teenagers with behavioural problems aged 14 to 18, and No. 20, an assisted living centre for 16 to 18-year-olds.

Yes, you’ve already spotted the problem, I’m sure.

Two of them? In the same road? What could possibly go wro….

Oh. Right. This:

It is said youths have shouted abuse at passers-by, thrown stones at buses, climbed on to the roofs of the homes and on one occasion barricaded the street with furniture.

Shocking! But not entirely unexpected.

But the care home managers say behaviour has improved significantly at both homes and that residents need to understand the young people come from “challenging” backgrounds.

Do they? So what?

Does that excuse them behaving like animals? Does it mean the neighbours should just put up with it?

Just how did this situation come about, then?

According to one resident, planning permission was given to turn No. 1 Strathfield Gardens into a youth home around seven years ago, while No. 20 had received permission in the 1960s to become a care home for the elderly.

Because the latter was already a care home, the new owners, Lodge Care Group, did not have to apply for change of use before it opened in 2009.

Ahhh, a very cunning plan indeed. How useful.

A number of residents spoke about incidents where they were allegedly taunted, intimidated and subjected to noise nuisance late at night.

Some felt more restrictions should be put on the youngsters, but managers at the homes said they could not force anyone to stay inside as they were not running secure units.

Indeed, as recounted in bloodcurdling detail by Winston Smith, these poor challenged baa-lambs feral creatures are actually the ones running the homes…

Vital Safeguarding Of Post Office Shoppers

Thank god shoppers are protected from the menace of a post office selling eggs, jam and honey. Who knows what might have happened otherwise?

The ban comes after the Essex County Council spent £10,000 converting the library on The Green into a double-purpose self-service library and village post office.

"I'm very angry about it," the postmistress said. "I've been selling eggs, jams and honey for a long time.

"They don't make me much money but they're part of the reason people come into the shop.

"There won't be many more reasons for anyone to come in here anymore."

Now, I can remember holidays in Yorkshire where every little village had a post office-cum-everything else. You could get anything there – not just stamps and postcards home, but comics, sweets, toys, home-grown produce, etc.

And you may say that things change, and with huge supermarket conglomerates on the doorstep, why should that remain the same?

Well, equally well, why should it not?

According to Ms Rollason, the council told her solicitor that they did not think it was "appropriate" for the post office to continue to sell the products after it moved in to the library.

Is this one of the new-type libraries? Sorry, multi-media centre?

Still, maybe if she speaks to her local representa…

Oh:

Essex County Councillor John Aldridge, who helped Ms Rollason secure the move to the library, said he sympathised but stressed if the terms of the lease said no food then there was not much that could be done.

He said: "We're really happy to have the post office there, but if it was not part of the deal, it was not part of the deal. A few eggs are not worth falling out over."

Falling out with whom?

Are you afraid to do the job you’re elected to, Mr Aldridge? That of representing the wishes of your constituents?

Even More Impeccable Timing, Commissioner!

Cops putting their foot in it seems to be an Internet meme this week. First up, the new Commish:

Police should stop giving up on crimes that are difficult to solve and instead allow victims to decide whether an offence is investigated, Britain’s most senior officer has said.

Bernard Hogan-Howe, the new Metropolitan Police Commissioner, signalled that in too many cases officers were “screening out” offences and calling a halt to inquiries.

And no sooner had those words left his PR department, when…

When Sean Stanley caught thieves in the act of stripping parts from his two vans it seemed a simple case for the police.

The farmer and his father even pursued the culprits back to their travellers’ camp to make sure officers could recover the stolen property.

How civic minded! How brave! How big society! How…

…pointless:

Five police turned up in marked cars, only to then cite health and safety as a reason for not entering the site.

Ahahahahahahahaha!

‘They were scared, they wouldn’t go in. We could see the [thieves’] van, so me and my dad said we would go and get it and we were told we would be arrested. It’s ridiculous.’

No, it’s not. They’re afraid of the criminal scumbags ‘travelling community’. They’re not afraid of you.

And why should they be? You’re stupid enough to pay their wages and put up with this, after all.

Maybe Gadget’s right, when he constantly claims – when challenged – that the public ‘get the policing they deserve’?

Don’t we deserve this, for meekly submitting to demands for ever more money to support these people in the lives to which they have become accustomed?*

Mr Stanley has lodged an official complaint with Northamptonshire force about how his case was handled. The value of the theft is estimated to be around £1,500.

It’ll be brushed under the carpet. It always is.

Residents at the Ecton Lane travellers’ site, an official camp with 35 pitches to the north of Northampton, yesterday laughed off suggestions they posed a threat to police.

One man, who refused to give his name, said: ‘Us dangerous? I’ll let you use your common sense about whether that’s true.

‘People are always blaming us for things. Aren’t there any other criminals in Northampton?’

That’s a telling use of the word ‘other’, isn’t it?

A police spokesman said: ‘Three police officers did enter the site at Ecton Lane and located the suspect vehicle but an assessment was made not to recover the vehicle in the early hours of the morning.

‘Checks have been made on the vehicle. A complaint has been made by the victim about the decision not to recover the vehicle.’

No-one will be sacked over this. And no media figures will hurl this discrepancy between rhetoric and action back into Bernie Two-Dads’ face at his next media occasion.

And we’ll all go on paying for a service that doesn’t serve us, from a force that only uses force when it’s safe - and politically correct - for them to do so…

* Do I mean travellers or police? Even I’m not sure any more…

The School With A Holodeck!

Cornelius Vermuyden School in Dinant Avenue, Canvey, has undergone a multi-million pound transformation, which has seen 90 per cent of the school reconstructed.

The work has been carried out with £20million of Government funding as part of the now axed Building Schools for the Future programme.

The second phase of the project is now complete with classrooms created from steel girders and an “immersive” room, which can transport pupils into a different world.

The walls and floor of the room are digital and touch sensitive, which means the schoolchildren can be transported to a virtual location, and can take a tour of a First World War battlefield or another part of history.

Hmmmm….

Sounds familiar!

Katy Hibben, assistant headteacher, said the whole school had an open feel which was largely influenced by the pupils’ own suggestions.

She said: “Some of the classrooms don’t have doors. It has a college-like feel as opposed to a secondary school.

“It is an open, airy space, it is what our pupils have asked for. They were quite involved in the design process. All of the teachers are absolutely blown away by this space.”

Let’s hope you can now teach the kiddiewinks to read, write and add up, eh? Or all the money spent will just be wasted.

Mind you, at least you'll still be ahead of some Essex schools.

Judge Hagen Has No Doubts…

…the rest of us might well have them, however:

When police went through CCTV footage, they recognised Hodosi, as did the shop manager, as he was a regular customer.

/facepalm

Joe Hodosi, 25, has been jailed indefinitely because he is considered a "substantial" danger to the public following his third firearms offence.

Yes, though the first two relate to an air rifle, this is clearly a man who isn’t firing on all cylinders…

In police interview he said he was in a "blue haze" at the time because he had taken valium, drunk half-a-litre of Southern Comfort, and could not remember the robbery.

You’d think that sort of thing would stick in your mind, wouldn’t you?

Mitigating, Ramin Pakrooh urged Judge Carol Hagen to impose an extended sentence, instead of an indeterminate one for public protection saying his client had never seriously injured anyone, either during his latest crime or previous offences.

"There cannot have been a great deal of thinking," Mr Pakrooh said. "It's such an irrational offence, given what there was to gain and what there was to lose.

"He's never done anything on this scale before."

Oh. Well, we’ll just wait until he does, shall we?

"It's quite apparent to me, not only from your letter but from the pre-sentence report, that you had an unimaginably hard and difficult childhood and upbringing and I have no doubt that is one of the reasons that you adopted the lifestyle that you did," Judge Hagen told Hodosi.

No, it’s one of the excuses…

She passed an indeterminate sentence for public protection.

He cannot be considered for parole until he has served six years.

Not sure what 6 years is going to do that his current 25 haven’t, mind you.

No Vultures, Please!

After all, it wouldn't do to encourage thoughts of their own mortality:

Residents of a local retirement home received a visit from some unusual guests.

Five birds of prey swooped into Harts House in Woodford Green, as part of Bupa Wildlife Week.

Accompanied by Randal Carey from Countrywide Falconry, the birds were allowed to fly free in the home, settling on armchairs and zimmer frames to allow the pensioners a close up view.

See what you get with BUPA?

Of course, it wouldn't be a 'heartwarming animal story' without some misidentification, now would it?

Errr, no. Not even close.

Unfortunately, Judge, It’s His Habit Of ‘Seizing Things With Both Hands’…

…that’s got him into….well, not exactly trouble:

Darren Holloway snatched cigarettes and tobacco in an early hours raid on the Co-op supermarket in Downend and was arrested when police saw him with two carrier bags nearby, a court heard.

Five days later, while on bail, Holloway burgled the Royal Archer pub in Kingswood and was arrested because a carrier bag had his fingerprint on it.

Holloway, 26, of Cheltenham Road, pleaded guilty to two burglaries as well as theft from a motor vehicle.

He asked for 12 similar offences to be considered after going on three "drive rounds" with police and admitting further break-ins.

And for this he got….*drum roll*….

Yeah, you guessed. Nothing:

Judge Michael Longman gave him a community order, comprising of 18 months' supervision and a six-month drug rehabilitation order.

That’ll teach ‘im.

The judge told him: "That's probably the best opportunity you're ever going to have.

"One of the most persuasive factors is you haven't had one before. You've got to seize it with both hands; if you don't you're going downstairs and for quite a long time."

Oh, and in case you were wondering if the fact that this is his first offence – sorry, string of offences – is the reason for the leniency, then think again:

David Miller, defending, said: "Mr Holloway has been addicted to Class A drugs for a third of his life.

"This crime spree, from late May to late June, is a reflection of what happened to him and how he responded when he was released from his last and lengthiest custodial sentence."

Which clearly worked well.

So, we’ve tried locking him up – no effect – and now we’re trying not locking him up – anyone want to guess? – so, what’s next?

This Is What Your Council Tax Pays For…

…are you grateful?

Oxfordshire health bosses have advised parents on the best way to answer inquisitive kids’ questions on sex.

Whew! Thank god we have councils to tell us this sort of stuff, eh? How ever did we manage before this?

Advice for inquisitive three- to four-year-olds includes telling toddlers about ‘special cuddles’ between mummies and daddies which end in a baby being ‘kept warm in mummy’s tummy’.

*speechless*

Stop sticking your hands in the public’s pocket!

Impeccable Timing, Inspector!

Just as Inspector Gadget posts a shocking exposé of the current situation regarding police resourcing (basically, there’s no money, no equipment and it’s shocking how the back-room officers can still afford to bang on about diversity while those at the front end can’t concentrate on ‘ordinary crime’), this happens:

Mr Murray said the two uniformed officers from Lancashire Constabulary arrived at lunchtime on Monday, the cafe’s busiest time of day. WPC June Dorrian, the community beat manager, told him there had been a complaint and he was breaching the Public Order Act 1986.

Mr Murray said: ‘I told them that all that appeared on the screen were the words of the New Testament. There is no sound, just the words on the screen and simple images in the background of sheep grazing or candles burning. I thought there might be some mix-up but they said they were here to explain the law to me and how I had broken it.

‘I said, “Are you really telling me that I am facing arrest for playing the Bible?” and the WPC fixed me with a stare and said, “If you broadcast material that causes offence under the Public Order Act then we will have to take matters further. You cannot break the law.” ’

Mr Murray, who worked in a homeless shelter for five years before taking over the cafe three months ago, said he realised the only way to appease the police was to pull the plug on the Bible.

‘I was worried about being handcuffed and led out of the shop in front of my customers. It wouldn’t have looked good so I thought it was better to comply. It felt like a betrayal. They left the shop and told me they would continue to monitor if we were displaying inflammatory material. At no stage had they spoken to me like I was a law-abiding citizen trying to earn a living. I felt like a criminal.’

You’ll note that these weren’t those HQ office-based staff that the good Inspector blames for all the diversity madness.

These were the front line.

The Christian Institute, which is supporting Mr Murray, said its lawyers had told him he is free to display the Bible in any way he chooses, and they are preparing a complaint against the police.

Good. Because it’s the only way they’ll ever stop; when this sort of thing attracts adverse consequences, rather than a tick on the ol’ diversity-friendly box on their annual assessment…

The Institute’s spokesman Mike Judge said: ‘I have no problem with the police looking into a complaint, but once they realised it was just the words of the Bible being shown on the screen then they should have walked away.

‘They did not even look at the offending DVD. They simply told Mr Murray that he had to stop showing the Bible and warned him that they would continue to monitor what he was doing. This is intimidatory and completely unacceptable.

‘It is a problem right across the country that the police are under huge political pressure to be seen to respond to anything homophobic.’

The police are, as might be expected, all ‘What? Us? Surely not, oh no, we’d never do that…’:

Lancashire Police said they had received a complaint on Saturday afternoon from a female customer who was ‘deeply offended’ by the words she had seen on the screen.

A spokesman said they were ‘duty bound’ to respond to the complaint and had concluded the cafe could be in breach of Section 29E of the Public Order Act, which warns that people who play images or sounds that stir up hatred against homosexuals could be guilty of an offence.

However, it also says criticism of sexual conduct ‘shall not be taken of itself to be threatening or intended to stir up hatred’.

Maybe they didn’t read that far..? Or didn't understand it?

They are relying on the time-old tactic of flat-out denying the impression Mr Murray clearly took of the encounter:

A police spokesman said: ‘At no point did the officer ask the cafe owner to remove any materials or arrest the man and we took a commonsense and objective approach in dealing with the complaint.

We believe our response and the action we took was completely proportionate and our officers are always available should the cafe owner want to discuss the matter or need any advice in the future.

‘The Constabulary is respectful of all religious views. However, we do have a responsibility to make sure that material that communities may find deeply offensive or inflammatory is not being displayed in public.

‘No complaint has been received about the conduct of the officer in question and we are satisfied that they performed their duties professionally.’

Well, you must have received one by now…

Tragedies In The Time Of ‘Political Sensitivity’

With their heads bowed scores of firefighters remembered Hanin Kua, 14, sister Basma, 13, mother Muna Elmufatish, 41, and little brothers Mustafa and Yehya, aged five and two who were killed when a fire swept through their home in Neasden, north west London in the early hours of yesterday.

Is this normal?

Crest Academy will be opening as normal tomorrow but there will be an assembly at 9.50am for students to pay their respects.

A counselling service for girls traumatised by the tragedy will be offered at the school by a children's bereavement agency.

OK, sadly, that’s normal these days, when schools feel compelled to ‘do something’ despite evidence that this doesn’t help and may even make things worse.

But this is surely not normal?

The fire is being treated as unexplained, and the Metropolitan Police and London Fire Brigade have begun an investigation, a police spokesman said.

Matthew Gardner, Met Police borough commander, said it was 'not being treated as suspicious'.

I mean, if it’s unexplained, how can you rule anything out?

And as for this:

At a press conference this afternoon, he said officers would be making 'reassuring patrols' across the area in the coming days.

What? Why? This is surely not normal after a house fire, even one with such a body count?

This might be a clue:

The family are believed to be Palestinian refugees who came to Britain seeking a better life.

OK, now I’m beginning to see why this rather odd official response has been taken.

It Comes As A Surprise To Me Too…

…albeit for differing reasons:

A former Sherborne teenager who denied criminal damage to a glass window pane in a door at a housing association property where he was then living was convicted at a trial, despite him not attending.

Well, yes. Conviction in absentia is perfectly possible, and not even rare.

The bench was told he had not turned up for the trial hearing on August 19 and he admitted failing to answer his bail.

The case had gone ahead in his absence, and he had been convicted of destroying the window pane on March 24.

If you don’t turn up, surely you can’t complain?

When the case first came before the court, magistrates heard that his contention was that it had been a lawful accident.

Julian Lawrence, prosecuting, said that the criminal damage incident had been after Rendell became angry following a friend of his having been searched by police.

Well, that’s what I always do when a friend has been searched by the police, break someone’s wind…

Oh. Wait. No, I don’t. Mainly because none of my friends has ever been searched by the police…

Simon Brimacombe, defending, said Rendell was confused about his having been required to attend court and thought he had been merely told off.

He said: "He thought that matter had been dealt with. The conviction comes as quite a surprise to him."

*sigh* Well, of course it does!

Consequences must be a totally alien concept to people of his generation!

And the judicial system seems determined to reinforce that attitude:

Magistrates imposed a fine and surcharge of £40 for the criminal damage offence and decided the conditional discharge should continue to run for its full 18 months.

Chances of that fine being paid, anyone?

Forgotten Something..?

/facepalm /facepalm

An Everyday Story Of Complete Wastes Of Oxygen

Stuart Flynn was only four minutes from home when he was viciously attacked in the street

Paul Creighton and Michelle Roberts, who were drunk and high on drugs, set upon him for no reason in Noel Street, Hyson Green.

Creighton, 20, stamped on his head five times while Roberts, 19, kicked his legs as he lay on the ground.

Mr Flynn, 38, was left unconscious in a pool of blood, making a "horrible rasping sound".

But Creighton and Roberts hadn't finished. Creighton stamped on his head four more times, rifled through his pockets and stamped on him again.

Roberts laughed while Creighton continued the attack. She kicked Mr Flynn.

Witnesses saw the couple, who have two young children, laughing and hugging before they left Mr Flynn in the early hours of April 22.

Hopefully, that’s a typo, and the sentence should have read ‘had two young children’. Because if ever a couple deserved to have their parental rights removed, it must be these two.

And forget any whinges about the appalling outcomes for fostered kids. The children would be probably be better off if raised by wolves…

Mrs Flynn, of Radford Road, New Basford, is off work caring for her husband as he learns to eat, walk and speak again.

She believes what happened might have had something to do with her husband's appearance as he likes Punk music and has dreadlocks.

"I don't think it was motivated by financial gain," said Mrs Flynn. "It was more about the way he looks and because he was on his own and vulnerable.

"Behaviour like this is so alien to anyone or anything I know. To come back so repeatedly after he was unconscious. It's the repeated nature. I can't understand why anyone would do that to a human."

Me neither. Other than the fact there are so few consequences, why not?

Creighton and Roberts, both of Zulu Road, New Basford, were initially charged with attempted murder.

Which was, of course, merely a bargaining chip to the CPS, despite it being far more accurate a charge:

The charges were downgraded to causing grievous bodily harm with intent, which both Creighton and Roberts admitted at Nottingham Crown Court.

I hope those lazy, incompetent, barely-functioning CPS drones are proud of their day’s work, I really do…

Judge Tony Mitchell gave Creighton an indefinite sentence for public protection, with a minimum of five years before parole is considered. He will be on life licence when released, which means if he re-offends he could go back to prison for life.

Technically, it means ‘if he reoffends and is caught and convicted’, of course.

Roberts wept as she was locked up for eight years and six months.

Except she wasn’t. That’s just what she was sentenced to. Everyone on Earth must now know that she won’t serve that.

There are probably tribesmen deep in the jungles of Papua New Guinea looking at the sentence, shaking their heads and saying ‘Out in five for good behaviour!’…

Mitigation should be a laugh:

Barry White, mitigating for Creighton, said he could not remember half of what happened but was full of remorse.

Really? Makes a change from being full of cider and cannabis I suppose…

Stuart Gosnell, in mitigation for Roberts, said she had not initiated the violence.

So, if you don’t throw the first punch, it’s perfectly OK to get in a few kicks as they lie on the ground? That counts as ‘mitigation’ now?

Why do we tolerate such creatures in our midst?

For Real, 24 Karat Chutzpah, It Takes An MP…

Top civil servants responsible for Hampshire’s white elephant fire control building have been promoted, a damning report has revealed.

Is anyone surprised? I mean, anyone who isn’t a visitor from outer space, that is?

In its report the committee says: “The project was beset by poor leadership and characterised by a high turnover of senior management staff. There have been five senior responsible owners and four project directors. None have so far been held to account for failures and most have suffered no hindrance to their career.

The department’s accounting officer between 2005 and 2010 is now the top Civil Servant in Scotland.”

Heh! That explains a lot…

The committee, which scrutinises public spending, also raised concerns about further spending. Committee chairman Margaret Hodge said: “The department now plans to spend a further £84.8 million to secure the original objectives of FiReControl, so that there is a co-ordinated response to national incidents. It is not clear to us how this will deliver value for money or achieve the objectives intended.

“No-one has been held to account for this project failure and the careers of most of the senior staff responsible have carried on as if nothing had gone wrong at all.”

Wait a minute….

Margaret Hodge? This Margaret Hodge?

Well, she seems pretty Teflon-coated herself, doesn’t she?

Suddenly That Puzzling News Item The Other Day…

…might not be so puzzling after all:

Tower Hamlets Council has launched a code of practice to reduce touting, where staff approach by-passers, often aggressively, to get their custom.

Restaurants are asked to agree not to use touts to drum up business or allow them to make false claims about offers.

Well, well, well. Was that what it was all about then?

It is part of a drive to improve Brick Lane ahead of next year when it is the London 2012 Curry Capital.

Just in time for the Olympics!

Crumbs From The Table…

…that’s what the victims of our pathetic justice system content themselves with:

Carrie Maclaren was killed walking home from celebrations on New Year's Day 2010, when a car driven by Shamail Ali Syed mounted a kerb, hitting Carrie and four of her friends.

Mohammed Afzal, who had been driving alongside Syed in another car, then stopped driving and collected Syed before fleeing the scene.

And what did he get? Would you believe, just seven years.

And that the family is satisfied with that?

Syed, 25, of Goodmayes Lane, Ilford, north-east London, was convicted at Wood Green Crown Court of two counts of causing death by dangerous driving, two of causing grievous bodily harm by dangerous driving, and one of causing bodily harm by wanton and furious driving .

"I think the family believe he got what he deserved," said Mr Hammersley. "If they had pushed for the limit, which was nine years, there may have been an appeal, which nobody wanted. "

Yes, you now have to be satisfied with a lesser sentence because you’ve learned that if a harsh one is imposed, it’ll get thrown out.

I ask you, is this ‘justice’?

Sunday Funnies

No Mel Gibson? Maybe no-one ever thought he was sane?

Get Down, Shep!!

A woman from Kent is facing 16 months behind bars for having sex with a dog.

Well, I suppose she's lucky to be alive, really...

Woolridge, of The Close, Downs Road, pleaded guilty to two charges of intercourse with an animal but initially denied sexual activity with a child.

Her barrister Alex Rooke asked a judge at Canterbury Crown Court for a 'Goodyear' indication as to the probably (sic) length of sentence for a guilty plea, a local paper reports.

Judge Adele Williams told her she faced a maximum of 16 months in jail for all three offences - and Woolridge, aged 45, then changed her plea to guilty for the charge relating to child sex activity.

I see. Might as well be hung for a sheep as...

Oh, I'm not going there. I'm really not.

Just ‘An Accident’? Think Again….

…nothing’s ever ‘an accident’ anymore. Someone (other than the victim) must be at fault:

The family of a five-year-old boy who died in a playground accident are demanding to know who was meant to be supervising the school break.

Well, assuming that the initial report – that the boy fell off a climbing frame – is accurate, unless it was The Flash, no-one could possibly have had the reflexes to do anything about it.

Unless you think children shouldn’t be allowed to climb on the climbing frame, it’s hard to see what more someone could have done…

Samuel Orola died at Tolworth Infant School in Surbiton after apparently falling from a climbing frame and banging his head.

As his parents grieved at their nearby home today, Samuel's uncle Femi Akinlabi said: "We still don't know how it happened. We've heard so many conflicting stories.

According to the police he fell off the climbing frame, but the school is saying something different.

"We can't understand how a child could die just like that, just from a fall. Wasn't anyone looking after him?

"You send a child to school and you expect them to be looked after, you expect them to be safe, you expect the school to take responsibility.

"We have to bury him first. Then we'll need to ask questions."

And, no doubt, hire a lawyer…

Why Can’t They Think Like Meeeeeee!

Dear, dear Yasmin again:

On Saturday we drove our daughter up to university where, for the next four years, she'll be studying for a degree in engineering… There she goes, a young woman who doesn't even consciously think it is her "right" to study a male-dominated course. She chose a subject and went for it.

So, you must be happy, right?

Within just two generations, my family has gone from barely any educated females to this.

Scratch ‘happy’ – you must be ecstatic?

Maybe this is why I am so grateful for the gains made by feminism – and also aware of its occasional drift into banality or hideous egocentricity.

Ah. I knew it couldn’t last.

One tires of middle-class, professional women prating on and on about how hard it all is – from "inconsiderate" nannies to husbands who don't sympathise enough with juggler mums in stilettos trying to keep all those plates spinning. These are but the gripes of small things.

OK, so, what should they be complaining about?

… such frustrations, though understandable, sound vain and flighty in these hard times, when various catastrophic national and international crises are gathering, affecting the life chances of millions of women and their children.

Such as…?

Would you believe, new film releases?

Yes, really:

And that brings me to the newly released film I Don't Know How She Does It, starring Sarah Jessica Parker about the many trials and tribulations of Kate Reddy, an ambitious and successful businesswoman, and also a mum with a loving husband.

AWFUL! OUTRAGE!

For feminists like myself the film irks not only because now Reddy seems selfish and greedy but because the highly dramatised domestic irritations of the privileged have been taken up by today's self-obsessed mumsy websites at a time when we have the global recession, wars, famines, undiminished male violence against women and evidence of increasing childhood trauma, even in rich countries.

‘Mumsy’ websites? Could she possibly mean….?

Oh. She could!

Look at the immensely powerful Mumsnet website and some other copycat ones and there is barely any mention of (or fundraising for) the famines in East Africa where mothers push dry breasts into the limp mouths of babies as they die.

Yazza vs Mumsnet – it’s like ‘Thunderdome’ only without the ugly mutants.

Not much about domestic violence either, or any serious take on the policies of the Coalition government which are leading to unprecedented numbers of female redundancies.

*yawn* Change the record, Yazz…

Some political issue occasionally slips in. Not nearly enough. In truth the new film and online chattering lasses are disturbingly apolitical and indifferent to class inequality between women and real gender parity.

Oh, how shocking! Maybe, unlike you, Yaz, they’ve just grown out of student politics?

What’s So ‘Extraordinary’ About It?

The father of Damilola Taylor today launched an extraordinary attack on the justice system, claiming his son's killers are being freed early because riots have left jails over-crowded.

And just why is that considered an ‘extraordinary attack’?

As far as I can see, he’s quite right.

As Richard Taylor prepared to meet David Cameron today, he told the Standard that "the whole justice system of the country needs reform".

Yes. It does. This is not a unique viewpoint, either.

Mr Taylor said he had opposed Ricky Preddie's release especially since he was initially freed last September after serving half his eight-year sentence but recalled after being seen with gang members. He said: "I asked the probation office to keep him there until 2013 and they turned down my request. The guy has no remorse, he is not repentant about what he has done.

"He has already broken the terms of his licence and it looks like he is ready to get back into criminality again."

I find nothing at all ‘extraordinary’ in this statement. Does anyone else?

One Of Our Police Officers Is A Pothead…

…but we aren’t allowed to know which one:

A judge today granted anonymity to a police officer who used official records to snoop on dealers he was buying drugs from.

Isn’t this insider trading?

The unprecedented order was made to protect a Scotland Yard officer who claimed he had been using cannabis for more than ten years to treat "nightmares and flashbacks."

Of course he has…

He admitted five breaches of the Data Protection Act at City of Westminster Magistrates' Court today. District Judge Howard Riddell made a court order banning the publication of the officer's name - which was displayed on public lists in the court building - as well as his address, picture or anything that could identify him.

Which now means every police officer who works at Scotland Yard will now be looked at with suspicion. Great job!

Dalia Naaman, defending, said the officer had undergone a course of treatment and was now not using drugs.

"He was very concerned that he could be a victim of robbery or violence and he did conduct a number of checks on these people," said Ms Naaman.

"There will also inevitably be consequences in terms of his continuing employment with the MPS.

Well, yes. One would hope so.

Wow, Martin Goss Must Have Moved To Newham…

…or someone there admires his work far too much:

People who fail to keep their front gardens tidy face hundreds of pounds in fines and clean-up charges…

What?!?

… while those who shop them will be rewarded with discount shopping vouchers.

Double what?!?!

Wait, Newham. Isn’t that…?

Ah. Of course:

Olympic host borough Newham is so concerned about the bad impression that messy gardens full of rubbish will have on the thousands of visitors who will flock to the area next summer that it has drawn up an action plan.

Well, let’s hope that the bylaw drafters of ancient Newham were foresighted enough to write onto the local statute books some law by which the council can compel people to clean up their front gardens.

Or they are going to be very, very busy fighting lawsuits.

"As the borough prepares for the Olympic Games, where thousands of people will be welcomed to Newham, the borough wants to ensure that it gives a good impression, which is not mired by any rubbish visitors might see."

I think the word your semi-literate spokesman was grasping for was ‘marred’, not ‘mired’…

‘Mired’ is what you are likely to become if you attempt to go down this route. In red-tape, regulations and angry court actions.

What Sort Of ‘Future’, I Wonder?

A brave schoolboy stepped in after he saw a woman being attacked in the street.
The 16-year-old saw Craig Claydon, 30, having a row with his girlfriend, Tanya Thompson, in Fossets Way, Southend, when he began to assault her.

The boy confronted Claydon by saying “Look, this is out of order, now stop it.”

But Claydon, of Westborough Road, Westcliff, re-sponded with “What are you going to do about it?” and rugby-tackled him to the ground.

Lovely!

Police arrived, but Claydon kicked the door of their patrol car, knocking it into the shin of one of the officers.

*sigh*

In mitigation, Paul Vickers said his client had no history of domestic violence.
He added: “He is living with Miss Thompson, the victim of the first matter. She did decline to make a statement to police.

“They are together, they moved into accommodation together and I understand they are awaiting confirmation she is in fact pregnant with her first child. They are planning a future together.”

Oh, FFS..!

Claydon was given a 24-month community order, during which he must complete the Integrated Domestic Abuse Programme.

He must also carry out 120 hours of unpaid work and pay £50 compensation to the police officer, £20 for the damage to a fishing rod belonging to the boy which was damaged in the fracas, and £50 costs.

Ah, well, at least in some small way he’s made to pa…

Oh:

The money will be deducted from his benefits.

*sigh*

Now, I don’t begrudge either the police officer or the lad their money, but I fail to see why I should pay it.

And anyone want to bet just how long it’ll be before we see him in court again, maybe this time because there was no-one there to stop him when he decided to take out his frustrations on his girlfriend?

Or on his child..?

Smile! You’re On Candid Camera!

Workers have called for CCTV in an underpass after complaints vagrants are using it as a toilet.

Why? To sell the footage to those, ummm, ‘specialist’ sites?

Andrew Everett, 33, a credit controller working in Sheepen Place, Colchester, said: “I walk through the tunnel three times a week and it’s disgusting.

“There are loads of school kids who walk that way too.”

Well, I hope they are careful where they put their feet…

He has called for CCTV to be installed.

He said: “The council has had numerous complaints and cleans it occasionally, but does nothing to prevent it happening again.

“It is a public health hazard.”

Just what should they do to prevent it happening? It’s not like they can stop it with CCTV – by the time they’ve seen someone on camera, it’ll be too late.

A police spokesman said they were investigating the incidents.

I suppose patrolling regularly would help, but then if they catch someone, what’s the punishment? A fine they can’t pay? Another public nuisance conviction to add to their collection?

Perhaps they should be allowed to rub their noses in it?

Police: We Swear To Uphold The Law Without Fear Or Favour....

...unless it looks like it might all kick off:

Supt Roe said tactically, by not arresting the activist, police prevented further “disorder and injury” by not inflaming an already tense situation.

Sounds a lot like the excuses made when they all stood aside and let Croydon burn, doesn't it?

That's because it's exactly the same.

He added: “If we were heavy-handed we would be criticised for escalating tensions and people could be hurt deliberately or by accident. If you aren’t going to lose evidence, as this offence was captured on camera, and no initial complaint has been made as in this case, there is nothing to stop you investigating an incident in slow time.”

When it's nice and safe...

And we don't get a tick in the 'doesn't play well with minorities' box.

Now, I like to think if it was acid, instead of scalding liquid, they'd have waded in regardless. Once, I'd have have been sure they would.

Not any more. Are you?

I’m Not Saying He Had It Coming, But…

A motorist deliberately knocked a Bournemouth cyclist off his bike, breaking his collarbone in three places.

Outrageous! Awful! Unprovok….

Oh. Wait.

Stephen is a member of New Forest Cycling Club and was out training on his Cannondale time trial bike at South Weir, just after 2pm on Sunday, September 11.

He was cycling towards Brockenhurst and said two car drivers came through a pinch point at around 40mph, when he believed he had the right of way.

Hmmmm, he ‘believed’, did he? Is that based on some section of the Highway Code, or perhaps just on the overweening arrogance of the average cyclist?

He slammed on his brakes and stopped just in time to give a frustrated ‘V’ gesture to the second car.

Ah. This incident is taking on quite a different complexion now, isn’t it?

The driver turned around and about 90 seconds later knocked Stephen off and drove away without stopping.

I don’t approve of that, and he should be charged with assault with a deadly weapon but only a cyclist could possibly go whinging to the local newspaper and blithely expect his own part in starting the whole unseemly kerfuffle to go unnoticed...

I Know, I Know, Fish In A Barrel, Right?

But somehow I can’t seem to stop shooting at Madeleine Bunting:

Where do you belong? Where are you from? Where is home? As the residents of Dale Farm have found, such questions are deeply political.

In the case of most of those ‘residents’, the answers are ‘not here’, ‘next door’ and ‘Rathkeale’, respectively…

In an age when we have become intoxicated by the technologies that shrink space – now we are able to communicate immediately with almost anyone anywhere in the world – it has become all too easy to belittle or overlook the geographical identities that motivate us. Yet politicians can have a tin ear to the passions that place provokes. In the Dale Farm case, one councillor was quoted as saying that they could move to some free pitches in St Helens, several hundred miles away in the north-west. Try saying that to the outraged residents of Buckinghamshire running a vigorous campaign against the high speed rail link: you can always move.

Yes, you read that right; Madeleine sees no difference whatsoever between illegal building on greenbelt land and legal householders fighting to stop an unnessary building development that will see them moved off their legally-bought property…

While Dale Farm residents struggle to make their case, the middle classes are adept at protecting the places they value, mounting hugely effective campaigns.

As we wait for Friday to roll around so this ten-year legal battle can finally be won by the rule of law, those poor residents might have cause to wonder just what an ineffective campaign would look like…

And some middle class people might start to wonder where they can hire a few crusties and political agitators.

Well, It Is Colchester…

Drug addicts collecting methadone at a pharmacy are being given priority over families, a mother has claimed.

How many can there be?

Louise Davies, from Greenstead, Colchester, says she has been forced to stand in hour-long queues while recovering addicts are seen first at the Boots Chemist in Tamarisk Way.

That many..?!?

The mother-of-three has called for Boots to review its policy and open a separate clinic for people needing methadone – a replacement drug to wean addicts off heroin.

She said: “I have nothing against the patients and understand that they need their medicine.

“But if there are that many methadone takers on the books, the shop should close to see them at a certain time.

“It is not really the kind of thing you want children waiting amongst and they must feel self-conscious having to collect it in front of other people.”

I doubt it. I really do…

Clearly, It’s Too Dangerous For Them To Stay Here…

…so send ‘em all home! Well, that’s the inevitable train of logic we must surely follow now:

Teenage asylum seeker Salman Ahmed was jailed for more than five years at Oxford Crown Court yesterday, but his accomplice remains at large.

The 17-year-old, who came to Britain from Iraq in November, took part in the multiple rape of a 23-year-old woman in Church Cowley Road on March 16.

And it was clearly being in our country which drove him to it:

Jeannie Mackie, defending, said her client was previously “without sexual experience” and suffered “an alcoholic blackout” meaning he could not remember the incident at all. He pleaded guilty when DNA evidence linked him to the crime.

Alcohol? But…

She said: “Alcohol has been an issue in my defendant’s life. Although he comes from a Muslim family he had not drunk alcohol until November 2010 when he came to this country, and alcohol has become a problem.”

Well, can’t take any chances, then. Never mind all that rubbish about it being ‘too dangerous’ to send asylum seekers home, it’s clearly also too dangerous for them to stay, right?

Judge King told him it was “extremely likely the Home Office will have you deported as soon as you have completed the custodial part of your sentence”.

Only ‘extremely likely’?

'Mail' Readers Smarter Than 'Mail' Reporters - Official!

Mail runs 'What the hell is this!?' story:



Readers reply in the comments:



*sigh*

Q: When Do The Police Start To Take ‘Internet Harassment Campaigns’ Seriously?

A: When they themselves are on the receiving end:

A police officer was harassed by a civilian member of the force via Facebook after his dogs died in his car.

Well, so what?

Insp Gadget’s blog is always full of police whinges and moans about having to deal with the pointless complaints of the underclass that ‘someone’s dissed them on the Internet, innit?’.

Why should this be different?

Peter Haywood, from Clifton, became an administrator on the Facebook group "Prosecute Mark Johnson for allowing two police dogs to be cooked alive in his private car."

The group, which has since been removed from the social networking site, attracted in excess of half-a-million members, Nottingham Crown Court heard.

Haywood posted abusive messages, encouraged abuse from others, gave details of PC Johnson's home address and his court appearances and posted photographs of him online.

The only thing that I can see that merits any kind of action – and that from the police disciplinary complaints team themselves, not the courts – is the publication of the officer’s home address.

Everything else...? Well, isn't he fair game for that?

The officer became aware of the Facebook site before his trial. He started to suffer from insomnia and also began making dummy runs from his address to make sure he was not being followed.

His wife became increasingly concerned and on May 10, last year, took an overdose.

She was given a panic alarm and described the experience as a "living nightmare".

You know how he could have avoided all this? He could have not left two dogs to die in his car through his own carelessness and incompetence.

That’s how I plan never to be the target of a ‘harassment campaign’. It’s working so far…

Judge Michael Stokes QC accepted that the extreme messages were not left on the site by Haywood.

He told him: "Some of yours are unpleasant if not nasty. You should have removed extreme messages but did not."

And if you didn’t, how is that suddenly a matter for the courts, and not for Facebook themselves?

Haywood received a 12-month prison sentence, suspended for 18 months, 150 hours of unpaid work and an electronically-monitored three-month curfew.

Hmmm. Remind me, what did Johnson get for his crime?

PC Johnson was found guilty of causing unnecessary suffering to his dogs after a trial in February 2010 and received a six-month conditional discharge.

Ah. Right. Welcome to the ‘justice’ system, where pointing out someone’s irresponsible and criminal conduct is now treated far more harshly than that conduct ever was.

After the case, Sergeant Jon Kerry said: "Haywood began a sustained campaign of harassment against the officer. His actions caused immense distress and fear for the officer and his family. Hate campaigns, cyber bullying and harassment are simply not acceptable. They will be investigated, with the perpetrator facing criminal charges."

‘Unless it’s between Shazneece and Tamsyn, in which case we’ll go on police blogs and bitch and whine about it…’

"...I needed one more fare to make my night, a lady up ahead waved to flag me down..."

A new taxi rank could be set up in Southend High Street.

Council chiefs are considering creating a pick-up point for cabs in the loop of road which links Clarence Street and Weston Road.

Sound like a good idea. who could possibly object to...

Oh:

However, the idea has been met with outrage by the council’s Tory deputy leader, John Lamb.

He said: “We have deliberately pedestrianised the High Street to make it a safe place for people to go with their families.”

Maybe he has a point? I mean, it's be a shame to dig up all that vast pedestrianised area to...

Oh. Wait. I know the bit he means. And so does GoogleMaps:

Yes, indeed. There's already a road there.

Putting a taxi rank in might inconvenience Southend Police, who it seems are always parked outside M&S, but not anyone else. Certainly not shoppers, who are well aware that this lower part of the High Street is definitely NOT 'pedestrianised'.

“I can see the point of having it at night, when the taxis would be able to quickly take away the people coming out of the pubs and clubs.

“But during the day, it should not happen. It’s an issue of safety.”

And we all know how Southend Council feels about road safety...

But 'safety' is what they always reach for, isn't it? He'd have been on much safer ground if he'd pointed out that there's a taxi rank within a stone's throw of this road (down the side of BHS, just to the right of that GoogleMap image) and so no need for a new one.

I Think They Placed The Contingent Destruction Order On The Wrong Beast…

An ultra violent robber who smashed in the faces of take-away delivery men after robbing them has been jailed for nine years.

‘Smashed in the faces of’..? Who’s writing this report?

Trained boxer Michael Dineen, 20, called a pizza delivery business, and a week later an Indian take-away, to Brierley, New Addington, last November where he used his Staffordshire Bull terrier Cleo to help him carry out the assaults.

The dog presumably being the brains of the criminal operation?

Mr Chowla spared the dog, registered to Dineen’s mother, but ordered a contingent destruction order which will see her put down should she be involved in violence again.

Couldn’t we apply that order to Dineen too?

Making Up A Scandal Out Of Whole Cloth

Two nine-year-old schoolchildren were stranded after a bus driver asked them to get off and escort a four-year-old back to her missed stop.

Shock! Horror! OUTRAGE!!!!

Declan Anstee and Olivia Flexman, both pupils at St Joseph’s School in Christchurch, did as they were told but found themselves struggling to find the girl’s home along one of the area’s busiest roads, it is claimed.

Neither of the children knew the girl, who is a pupil of Burton Primary School and she couldn’t remember her bus stop.

And when the bus driver got to the children’s intended stop, their mothers say they were told their missing children must have got off already or missed the bus at school.

Now that bit is a worry. Assuming it’s true.

A Dorset County Council spokesman said: “The safety of children is our number one priority and we take these reports extremely seriously.

“The county council acted immediately by sending a senior compliance officer to speak to parents, the school and the bus operator and ensure that children’s safety is maintained.

Starting today we will ensure that a member of county council staff personally supervises the bus until we are confident that the problem has been resolved.”

Which might take some time, as the comments (once you get past the ones calling for the bus driver to be flogged, tarred and feathered and then buried alive, before being dug up again to be burned at the stake) show:

Bigbobrob says...

This is NOT what happened I was there talking to the driver, my children were on that same bus.

The story fails to mention this is a school bus, set up by Dorset county council, the usual company set up to take the children are experiencing problems so the bus company concerned have been drafted in to help out until the problems are resolved. The bus driver asked every child there if their parents would be there at the bus stops to meet them, 60% of the children said NO! The little girl was crying and the bus driver was asking her what was the matter, Declan and Olivia got out of their seats and explain she never got off the stop she should have and then gave the impression they knew her and led her off the bus to walk her back, the driver and I then discussed how bad Dorset County Council are to expect 4 year old children to get on a bus by themselves!

Question is... Why wasn't the parent of the 4 year old girl there to meet her off the bus stop!!!

Quite.

But then ‘Useless parent treats state-provided transportation service as free babysitting service’ isn’t such a great headline, is it?

Gosh, You Don't Say..?

I'd never have guessed...

Priorities...

Ex-Crown Prosecution Service manager Mr Goring, after strangling his wife over shopping channel debts:

He said that after the incident he had sat on the bed. He did not check on his wife's condition or call for help.

He told police: "I could only think about what I should do with the dog."

All those years in the CPS, and he couldn't come up with anything better than that for mitigation..?

H/T: Henry Crun via email

No, The World Does NOT Revolve Around Your Offspring…

A nursery has been told its children will have to spend more time indoors because it is breaking a planning rule designed to limit noise.

Fair enough. About time the kiddiewinks learnt boundaries and consequences.

Managers at Kings Castle Montessori in Saxonbury Road, Bournemouth, had been letting children play and study outdoors for much of the day – but did not notice they were breaking a condition placed on an earlier planning application.

And they’re supposed to be the adults, remember?

Caroline Hexter, acting manager of the nursery, said: “They’re not able to be learning outside when studies left, right and centre are saying how beneficial being outside is for children.

“We’re very upset about it. The children have a full and active curriculum inside but it’s nice to be able to give them the outside space as well where they learn so much more.”

Yes, I’m sure it is ‘nice’ but a) the weather will soon curtail that and b) the restrictions were put there for a reason.

The nursery had won council grants totalling almost £19,000 – including awards for outdoor equipment such as a canopy, water butts, play equipment and waterproofs.

If the application had been approved, the nursery would have been able to use the play area for two hours a day plus up to five hours’ supervised use of the garden for learning for up to 12 children.

And the reson for the restriction? Well, noise, of course:

Neighbour Michael Jinks started a petition against the planning application which attracted 16 signatures.

He said the nursery had already caused problems and that “two hours a day is plenty for children to be outside”.

Another neighbour whose home backs onto the nursery site claimed the playing was waking her in the mornings.

Now, here’s where the comments come into their own. Do you think they are full of support for the residents?

Reader, they are not:

eunoia6 says...

Appalling neighbours. Surely there is no lovelier sound than happy children laughing and playing?

I sincerely hope they win their appeal.

‘No lovelier sound’..?

Well, if you like it so much, I’m sure Mr Jinks would be happy to send you a recording…

fletch for manager says...

typical of the oap brigade got nothing better to do than moan and make everyone elses life a misery.. Hope the school is successful in the appeal..

No, he’s merely expecting the school to abide by the agreement they signed. Not to simply say ‘Ooops, we forgot!’ and then try to force amendments through.

We aren't tolerating that one with the Dale Farm mob, why should we tolerate it with an achingly-trendy middle class school?

John26 says...

This is such a shame as my kids go there. Mr Jinks shame on you do something better with your time. The school has been there for more than 12 years and you moved in knowing it was a nursery. Why don't you stay inside for 22hrs a day and we can let you out for two??

Yes, he did move in knowing it was a nursery, but also knowing the amount of time your little darlings had to run around screaming at the tops of their voices would be limited…

Outraged_of_Bournemouth says...

My children go there and have both been adversely affected by the selfish Mr Jinks. They now have to stay indoors nearly all day and come home desperate to go into our garden and run around. The sound of children happily playing is wonderful, and the children are very very happy there....or were, until Mr Nimby started complaining.

For the last time: the ‘sound of children playing’ may well be ‘wonderful’ to you. But it sounds like it's not so wonderful that you want them doing it in your vicinity, though you're quite happy for Mr Jinks to have to suffer it...

I do like the 'selfish' jibes that everyone falls back on, though. Is there anything more selfish than a doting parent oblivious to the fact that everyone else is the world doesn't owe them anything because they've managed to procreate?

No Hand Signals..?

Between 5.30pm and 6pm on August 17, two young women who were jogging in Parrock Street, Gravesend, reported that a man performed a sexual act in his car whilst they ran past him.

They ran towards the town centre but the man followed them in his car until they reached a shopping area where he then drove off.

*tut*

Sheer laziness. I remember when flashers walked to….errr, ‘work’.

A second incident was reported to have taken place between 11.50pm on August 18 and 1am on August 19.

A woman, aged in her 20s, was walking in London Road, Stone, when a man pulled up in his car alongside her.

He indecently exposed himself and then performed a sexual act.

The woman continued to walk along the road and the man drove off.

Hopefully with both hands on the wheel?

A Note To The Editor Of The 'Echo'...

....'i before e except after c'.

*sigh*

Surely Some Mistake..?

I really don't think that photo should have gone there....

I think the ladies of the Quilting Society are going to have a few sharp words with the pictures editor!

This Is One Of Those Court Cases…

…where what’s left out must be far more interesting than what they’ve printed:

A judge asked a Didcot prostitute to justify how she could charge a client £20,000 a week.

I guess he thought he was getting a better deal than he’d previously imagined!

Dawn Dunbar, of Wessex Road, Didcot, told the judge although she realised her fees were 10-times the usual rate, they were for services rendered.

There’s a picture of her at the article. Now, I’m no oil painting myself, but if she’s getting £20000 a week, I could be on Premier League footballers money!

She made the claim on Tuesday at Reading Crown Court as she tried to hang on to hundreds of thousands of pounds given to her by Paul Hopes who had stolen the money.

If the money was for services, the 37-year-old could not be forced to give it back. If if was a gift, the court could make her hand it over.

And so she came up with this rather desperate gambit.

Judge John calculated the weekly average she had received and said: “The amount is not £500 a week. It is not £1,000, or even £2,000 a week. It is £20,000 a week. How do you manage to evaluate your services – sex – at £20,000 a week?

“How do you justify that?”

Miss Dunbar replied: “It wasn’t me that was putting the worth on that. It was Mr Hopes paying what he thought it was worth.”

Now, there’s a man who should’ve gone to ‘Specsavers’…

Prosecutors argued successfully on Tuesday that most of the money given to Miss Dunbar was not earned by her and could thus be confiscated.

The judge ruled that receivers could chase the remaining cash and any assets obtained with the money, including a Toyota Landcruiser she bought for her husband Martin Iheanacho, and her own £42,000 Lexus 4X4.

The enforcement team will also go after properties she bought, including a £60,000 plot of land in her husband’s native Nigeria. A £132,000 Bentley Continental which Hopes bought Miss Dunbar has already been confiscated.

*boggle*

The court heard while supporting Miss Dunbar and four other prostitutes – processing stolen money through a special account – Hopes was not spending any of the money on himself or his wife Gillian.

She has since divorced him and been awarded the family home, in Woodley, near Reading.

Thank god there appear to be no children…

Mind-Blowing Petty Control Freakery? Must Be The RSPCA Again…

When a cat appeared in Gary Sherman’s garden in June he cared for it for a week before he discovered it had hurt its leg and took it to the vets.

But when the cat, which he called Buster, was handed to the RSPCA, Gary and his wife, Jeannie, were shocked to find that even if they paid the cat’s vet’s bills they could not take him back home with them.

Wha..?

Earlier this week, the Adver revealed that 24 cats are being cared for by the local charity, but, because they do not have any on-site facilities to house them, the animals are being put up in private catteries – which is costing £6 a cat a night.

/facepalm

“We have already got four cats, we know what we are doing,” said Gary.

“My point is if they are desperate for homes why don’t they let us have that cat?

“We offered to pay all the bills incurred. All this time, if the cat is still alive it is taking up room, it is costing them and there is a home here waiting for it.”

But you see, it’s not the right home, according to those jumped up little petty bureaucrats fearless animal defenders.

Gary has written to the RSPCA headquarters but has still not had any luck.

That’ll be the huge, well-staffed building they spend all their money on, right?

RSPCA committee member Alison Toop said: “We don’t rehome cats to the area they were found. A lot of cats get injured and we have had people try and scam us and pretend it is not their cat and try and adopt it back when its had the treatment.

“Also, if he adopted the cat and the other owner lived two streets down the old owner might take it back. ”

Yes, that’d be terrible, clearly, if the original owner found his or her lost pet, wouldn't it, Alison?

And did you miss the bit where they said they'd be happy to pay all the bills, and so clearly don't fall into that tiny minority of irresponsible pet owners out to scam the RSPCA out of some of it's precious political campaigning...err, sorry, animal-saving money?

“We have got a lot of cats, so if he wants to take one of the other cats by all means he can do.”

Oh, how good of you, you patronising cow!

Except he doesn’t want any cat, he wants this one. The one that he’s probably now wishing he never handed in to the soulless machine intelligence of the RSPCA, when rules and guidelines are there to ensure no-one ever does any thinking outside the box.

If Mr Sherman has any money to leave a charity in his will, I bet it won’t be to you.