Tweet Of The Month

 A good selection for May! Love Twitter for the snark...

Post Title Of The Month

Christopher Snowden weighs in on one of the worst modern habits:

Quote Of The Month

LegIron has been hors de combat with bronchitis:

"There really should be a website called SickAdvisor where you can rate your illnesses. I’d give acute bronchitis 1/10- definitely would not recommend. It gets the one point because it didn’t kill me and because it saved an absolute fortune in tobacco. The NHS suggests you don’t smoke if you catch this, which only goes to show how little they understand smoking. If you catch this thing, no matter how dedicated a smoker you are, you will struggle to get through a cigarette a day. It’s the most likely thing I’ve ever come across that could convince me to give up smoking."

Post Of The Month

Tim Worstall (where I can comment again!) on a conundrum of modern times - 'Guardian journalists' continued employment'....

Is There No Escaping It, Ever?

If you’re like me, hearing that Martha Wells’ beloved Murderbot Diaries were going to be adapted into a TV show triggered both desire and dread. The books are hugely important to a lot of people, especially fans like me who are neurodivergent, on the nonbinary spectrum, or on the asexual or aromantic spectrums. So how did Apple TV+ do with the first two episodes? Is the show a brilliant success or utter failure?

Well, I for one really enjoyed it, but what does a professional reviewer think? 

I mean, they don't let anything distract them from the purity of sci-fi and fantasy, do they? They haven't been taken over by the relentless march of the progressives, have they? Let's see, eh, Reader?

I want to preface this by saying these episodic reviews won’t be a side-by-side comparison with the book, All Systems Red. My reviews of the TV show will try to examine it as its own thing, with some contextual analysis around the translation from text to screen.

I think what follows doesn't really meet the definition of 'contextual analysis', but is more of a 'how many times can I shoehorn progressive gender tropes into this article' ... 

When Gurathin forces Murderbot to make eye contact, the easy script choice would be to have Murderbot glare him down and intimidate him into backing off. But that misses this great little moment of character development. We see Murderbot’s, well, humanity. I think every neurodivergent person who struggles with eye contact has had an experience similar to what Gurathin put Murderbot through. You’re trying to make eye contact even though it makes you uncomfortable because someone else is forcing you to “be normal” so you end up counting how many seconds you hold eye contact and where else you can look where it seems like eye contact even though it’s not and when to look away then back and you’re running all these metrics and negotiations while trying to hold onto the thread of the conversation and also planning out how you’re going to reply and anticipating responses to half a dozen other possible paths the conversation might take and by the end of it you’re so fucking exhausted and stressed that you want to go hide in a dark, quiet corner somewhere to decompress.

Wait, there's more! 

Furthermore, Gurathin accusing Murderbot of being “wrong” gave me the same vibes as the experience of how every now and again how your masking slips and you misjudge a social situation or misinterpret an interaction and suddenly everyone else can see you’re not like them. I used to get that on three fronts, back before I had realized my identities: trying to act like a cis woman (I’m genderqueer), trying to act het (I’m asexual and aromantic), and trying to act neurotypical (I’m neurodivergent). You know deep down that you’re different but because you don’t have the vocabulary for it you think you’re broken.

A reviewer confessing they 'lack vocabulary' should be a red flag to an editor, but of course, there are no editors here. 

Okay, now for the elephant in the room: gender. Ratthi calls SecUnit a “handsome fella” and “buddy” in a way that sounds masculine-coded to me. Arada uses “he” and is quickly corrected by Gurathin. However, Gugu uses “it” almost like a slur, got that hard “T” at the end. Everyone else says “it” like they do any other pronouns. I keep changing my mind on how Murderbot’s lack of gender is handled. On one hand, I think the scene where Murderbot is interrogated by PresAux about the missing map sections is overt in a way that’s designed to help cis people get comfortable with nonbinary/agender identities, yet in doing so ends up othering and misgendering Murderbot. On the other hand, the way each character processes Murderbot’s gender identity is subtle in an intriguing way and tells me, a genderqueer person who uses they/them, a lot about their personalities.

Rather like this review tells me a lot about the reviewer's hang-ups, and not so much about the show? 

This push-pull also popped up for me in how we are repeatedly shown that Murderbot has no genitalia. It feels both invasive and hand-holding. It literally exposes Murderbot—and it has no choice in the matter because the repair cubicle offers it no privacy, although at least Mensah has the decency to look embarrassed after she goggles at it—which, in an era when some cis people are demanding to see trans and nonbinary people’s body parts before we can use a public bathroom or play sports, doesn’t feel great… but I also think that’s kind of the point. Murderbot feels safest in its armor and helmet and here’s Mensah seeing every inch of it and not able to hide her reaction. Yet it also forces cis audience members to reckon with that invasiveness while also reminding them that Murderbot does not have a gender, no matter what you think about its appearance.

I can't say that was something that crossed my mind as I watched a sci-fi tv show about a robot, but you do you... 

As an asexual who doesn’t really get “hot” and genderqueer person, I find this all both confusing and creepy. Why are y’all so obsessed with people’s genitals? It’s weird. Calm down.

We're obsessed? I'm reminded of the punchline to that story about the psychiatrist performing a Rorschach Test: 'Hey, you're the one showing me all the dirty pictures!' 

I Suppose Watching Your Offspring Like A Hawk Isn’t An Option?

The news that a child damaged a £42m Mark Rothko painting at a museum in Rotterdam last month had me wondering how I’d feel if my toddler was the culprit.

Probably delighted to have material for yet another tedious 'Look, I've reproduced, worship me!' column... 

This story has brought out two categories of people that I’ll admit I struggle with: people who don’t get the work of Mark Rothko, and people who dislike kids.

Oh, give me strength…. 

...it’s the usual calls for children to be banned from public spaces. They shouldn’t be allowed into galleries if they can’t behave, and their parents should be made to pay – that sort of thing.

And you can see why! 

Children respond instinctively to art. They have not built up defences, or preconceptions about it, and the earlier you take them to galleries and expose them to different styles and mediums, the more open and receptive they will be to things that are experimental, unusual or transgressive.

Or maybe children are just unsocialised little animals that shouldn’t be allowed free rein in society? 

Children explore the world through touch. My boy loves to scratch his fingers against woodchip wallpaper, to stand with his palms flat against the rough bark of a tree. Anyone familiar with kids will be able to imagine what went through that child’s mind as they stood in front of Grey, Orange on Maroon, No 8. Something about the unvarnished, slightly chalky surface of the paint made them want to feel it. And so they did. Arguably, in doing so, they connected with the work of Rothko on a deeper level than many adults.

🙄

Either way, I hope that the child wasn’t made to feel too bad. Perhaps it’ll be a funny story that the parents tell someday, and I bet they watch their child a bit more closely in future. I don’t want to add to the shame they are probably already feeling, but I do wonder if it’s time modern parents had a think about rehabilitating the much-maligned toddler reins of the 1980s and 90s, even if just for occasional use.

But wasn’t it your type of progressive mummies who demanded their use be curtailed as they stifled ‘free expression’ in the first place?  

More Pointless Non-Action Leading To Disaster

A woman was left needing hospital treatment for numerous wounds after being attacked by a dog just 50 metres from her home. Pat Pope said the attack happened as she took a shortcut to her home in the village of Ramsbury in Wiltshire, with the dog attacking her "in seconds" and "biting everywhere".

The BBC understands that the dog had been involved in less serious incidents previously, with the owner required to complete a responsible dog ownership course.

*sighs* 

Wiltshire Police (Ed; yes, Reader, they have form...) said the animal was seized and is now in police kennels, and the force is now working closely with Mrs Pope.

You wouldn't have had to, if you'd acted on those other incidents. 

Devizes NPT Inspector Simon Garrett said: "We appreciate the victim's frustration following this horrendous ordeal for her, and we have since visited her to apologise, answer her questions and provide an update on the investigation.

"We are working closely with the victim and her family to ensure she receives an excellent level of support and involvement in the investigation moving forwards."

Which you wouldn't be capable of supplying, if past performance is any guide.... 

Well, Andy, I Guess They’ll Have To Elect A New Population, Then, Eh?

He doesn't mean 'us', of course. This is the 'Guardian' - he means you lot.

With British politics fragmenting, voters are now being wooed by five national parties – an unprecedented situation, made even more unpredictable by an electoral system designed for serious competition between just two. It would be only a slight exaggeration to say that we are all swing voters now.

The increased pace of British politics over the past decade, with extra general elections, parties frequently changing leaders and ideological directions, and sudden electoral surges and collapses, suggests that politicians have become more scared of voters – and that voters have become less deferential towards them.

I'm not sure it's possible to get less deferential to this mob, but why should we ever be deferential? 

But is this voter-dominated politics an entirely welcome development? Recent history suggests not.

Oh dear. 

One way to picture a healthier democracy is as a place where voters and politicians have frequent clashes but also a degree of mutual respect – and an awareness that they are co-creators of a political culture. It may be optimistic to expect grumpy old Britain to become such a country, not least because so much of our media has a vested interest in voters angrily believing that they are badly governed.

Yes, if not for the media, we'd all be happily thinking this was the best government ever! 

Beneath the nonstop call for political change, moreover, is often a demand that change be minimised for voters themselves. Drastically reducing immigration, dropping diversity targets and other socially conservative policies especially popular with supporters or potential supporters of Reform UK – the minority group around which our politics currently revolves – are essentially intended to slow down, halt or even reverse social trends that some Britons believe are too disruptive. Thus much of the feverish quality of British politics these days paradoxically comes from a desire for the country to stay the same.

The pace of change - especially with regards to demographics and the enforced tolerance of bizarre ideas - has been noticably too fast  for most people. 

If and when the current era of voter dominance ends, perhaps with a government that combines great confidence with a big majority, we may look back on it nostalgically. Politicians easily become too sure of themselves and too distant from reality, and punishing them for those flaws is one of the main points of democracy. But voters can develop those flaws, too. Until more of us realise that, our fickle and unhappy politics will continue.

No they can't. The voters have to deal with reality (Green voters excepted), they cannot escape the consequences of it.  

Another Triumph For Policing In The UK....

“It is believed the driver of the Ford Galaxy car involved in this incident was able to follow an ambulance on to Water Street after the roadblock was temporarily lifted so that the ambulance crew could attend to a member of the public who was having a suspected heart attack,” Merseyside’s assistant chief constable Jenny Sims told a press conference.

And did Merseyside plod make no attempt to stop the vehicle? Did they not notice it? 

“There was no intelligence to suggest an incident of this nature would take place,” she added, reiterating that it was not being treated as terrorism.

Really? So, is it normal to have snipers on rooftops for victory parades?

 

And is it normal to take so long to question a suspect for an event that took place on live tv, such that the newspapers have had time to get interviews with his family and neighbours?

Liverpool city council confirmed that hostile vehicle mitigation measures had been in place on Water Street as part of a rolling road closure to support the traffic management plan for the parade. Sims defended the policing operation during the parade, saying the force planned for “all contingencies” - including road closures and an armed police presence.

Didn't plan for those 'hostile vehicle mitigation measures' to be overridden by your Keysyone Kops on the ground though, obviously... 

I’m Reminded Of This By Allsopp’s Tweet

This infamous article in the 'Atlantic' was the thing that sprang to mind reading Katie Allsopp's (now-deleted) Tweet about her horror when her train stopped at York and people who’d been to the races got on:

She was immediately defended by people who clearly shared her horror at the thought of people drinking champagne on their train, though I’m sure they were all the sort who’d deem you ‘racist’ if you complained about Notting Hill carnival-goers boarding your Tube munching fried chicken and swigging rum. Requests for what, exactly, they had done besides having obviously had a good day out were utterly ignored.

Instead, it was the usual 'How dare you think I don't have a good point!' from the Z list 'celebrity' who has just discovered social media is a two-way street...

Always The Ones You Least Suspect...

A primary school teacher and a barrister who specialises in children's cases 'routinely neglected' their adopted sons, with the teacher strangling and racially abusing one of the boys, a judge has found.

The couple successfully made a bid at the High Court in London to be anonymised, meaning details including their names, genders, pronouns, and other details, which might identify them or their children, cannot be published.

Of course! The Establishment looks after their own... 

X is a primary school teacher and Y a barrister specialising in children's cases, who also sits as a deputy district judge with authority to sit and hear private family cases.

Families who will not be allowed to know if their case is being heard by a wrong 'un. Though to be honest, in modern Britain, it's probably wise to assume that in any case! 

In a ruling about their anonymity at the start of May, the judge said the parents 'present themselves as victims, yet have then displayed behaviour that demonstrates their position and way of operating has barely changed and shows they can behave in an aggressive and threatening way, similar to the behaviour described by the children'.

But she concluded 'not without some considerable hesitation' that they should not be identified in these 'very unusual and complex set of circumstances'. Mrs Justice Theis said there was a public interest in the parents' professions being published and the 'public knowing that the parents hold positions of professional responsibility in respect of children'.

Thankfully, that's the wrong tense. 

In a statement written in January, the parents said they had struggled mentally since the start of proceedings, had had to sell their family home, and had no intention of returning to their professions.

But no doubt have found others... 

Someone Never Learned You Catch More Flies With Honey Than With Vinegar...

Anna Landre, a wheelchair user, was set to travel from London's Liverpool Street station on May 18. Arriving 'several minutes before' her train was due to depart, the 25-year-old said that she had enquired with members of staff about a ramp, vital in order for her to be able to board the train.

I’m not a wheelchair user, nor do I know anyone who is, and even I am fully aware that these things have to be booked in advance.

However, Ms Landre, who lives with spinal muscular atrophy, a rare genetic disease, was immediately informed that was deemed to be of 'lower priority' than other passengers who had pre-booked a form of assistance.

Describing the interaction as 'very abled-mansplaining', Ms Landre took to X to outline the stressful ordeal, adding: 'I firmly but politely told him that I know the law and did not need a lecture.

 I think we can all imagine how that conversation diatribe went, can’t we, Reader?

'He continued on and I repeated myself and said I was just looking to the next train since they'd failed to bring the ramp for the original one.' To Ms Landre's dismay, the member of staff then outright refused to assist her any further, branding her as 'rude'.

Then, after speaking with another, she presumed to be more senior staff member, the American activist was told that, given accusations of her 'rude' nature, she would be denied ramp assistance by 'any' staff member in the station.

So she’s American, and doesn’t know our customs? Should she get a break? 

Ms Landre, who moved to the UK three years ago …

 That’s a ‘NO’ then!

…after studying in Washington DC, was banned from boarding any trains from Liverpool Street Station and eventually forced to return home. Firmly denying any allegations of rudeness, Ms Landre added: 'I believe this able bodied man did not enjoy a young disabled woman speaking assertively back to him in the same tone he was using.

'And regardless, "rudeness" is not the standard for denial of ramp assistance. Abusiveness is, and I was certainly not that.'

Well, the railway staff in question may have a different view, so maybe we should get their side, eh? 

The Liverpool Fans Are The Men That Will Not Be Blamed For Nothing

As the news was coming in and the video from the scene showed it to be less of a terroristic ramming attack, and more of a panicked driver desperate to escape a mob, old grievances came to the fore:

It's noticable that the speed with which the Liverpool plod released the suspect's description far exceeded their rather leisurely stroll to the trapped car to arrest the driver before the enraged mob hauled him out and lynched him on the streets...

'My thoughts are with all those injured in tonight's horrific incident,' said Assistant Chief Constable Jenny Sims of Merseyside Police, who confirmed a man had been arrested.

The top cop urged the public not to speculate or spread misinformation online, and thanked emergency workers and bystanders who rushed to help the injured.

Well, since Southport, the internet has been a far better source of information than the authorities, so good luck with that! 

Just How Incompetent Are The Met Police?

The body of a man has finally been identified 10 years after he was struck by a car near his home in Walthamstow. Bryan Woolis died in a road traffic collision on January 22 2015, when he was hit by a Mercedes C-Class, but at the time, detectives had struggled to identify him or find his family.

Sounds as if they didn’t try that hard… 

Now, a South Yorkshire Police officer, who gave his free time to investigate the crash, has successfully identified Bryan and finally helped his family have some closure after his death.

Local police officer Nik Dodsworth first became aware of the case via an article on The Sheffield Star’s website and offered his free time to try and solve the mystery.

“When I first joined the police, this was the kind of job I envisaged myself doing every day, but of course the majority of the time it’s nothing like this at all.

We need more police like him. 

“As it was believed that Bryan had links to Sheffield, and with Locate International being primarily London based, I offered to help out.

How long did it take? 

“I had done about five hours of research, primarily internet-based and with some visits to negate possible identities that had been suggested on forums.

Good grief! 

“The Met were really helpful, and when I got the case notes from them it became quite straightforward.”

Good luck to him, and shame on the Met cops who didn't do their job. 

Sounds More Like It's Been Captured By Retards...

The prestigious centre-Right unit found that George Floyd’s death in 2020 led to schools hastily including material about ethnic minorities to appear ‘anti-racist’. Former history teacher and chairman of Campaign for Real Education Chris McGovern said it was ‘clear that the subject has been captured by the Left’.

Oh! Give us some examples, then: 

Children are being taught that Stonehenge was built by black people and the Roman Emperor Nero married a trans woman as woke narratives increasingly infiltrate schools, according to an education think-tank.

🤣😂🤣 

They are also being told – in pro-transgender resources – that genital mutilation of slaves was a form of ‘gender transition’.

Why on earth are ‘pro transgender resources’ ever necessary in schools? 

It comes as the Government conducts its curriculum review to ‘reflect the issues and diversities of our society’ – which the report says may be unnecessary as schools already do it. Backed by former education secretaries Lord Blunkett and Nadhim Zahawi, it also calls for pupils to be impartially given a better overview of British history.

Forget it - we know full well whatever is delivered is not going to be impartial, the teaching unions will see to that!  

Don’t Threaten Me With A Good Time!

Strawberry lovers are being warned a bumper crop for 2025 has left them “too big” to fit in their mouths. The whoppers will be sold at UK supermarkets and are “unlike anything” growers have seen in recent years.

Challenge accepted! Who said global warming was a totally bad thing? 

Bartosz Pinkosz, the operations director at the Summer Berry Company said brighter weather, longer days and rainy weather beforehand has made the monsters, which are now being picked to be sold.

Haven’t seen any yet. Hope they will be out in time for Wimbledon!

She Still Can, If She Keeps It In A Jar On Her Bedside Table...

...eh, Matt?

Sunday Funnies...

And critics laughed at Oliver Stone's 'JFK'..!

I Don’t Believe You

Former FBI director James Comey is being investigated by the Secret Service after he shared then deleted a social media post, which Republicans alleged was an incitement to violence against US President Donald Trump. 

Comey posted on Instagram a photo of seashells that spelled the numbers "8647", which he captioned: "Cool shell formation on my beach walk." The number 86 is a slang term whose definitions include "to reject" or "to get rid of", according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, which also notes that it has more recently been used as a term meaning "to kill". And Trump is the 47th US president.

Whoops!  

Comey insisted he did not know what the numbers meant, but Trump has disputed that.

Well, yes, I bet he did! Are they hiring morons as FBI Director these days?

Comey deleted the Instagram post, saying in a follow-up that he "assumed [the sea shells] were a political message". 

"I didn't realise some folks associate those numbers with violence," he added. "It never occurred to me but I oppose violence of any kind so I took the post down."

Good grief! No wonder he’s the former director! Man’s an idiot! 

Investigating Her Social Media Prior To Hiring Wouldn't Have Helped This Time...

A prison officer caught kissing a drug dealer inmate who she 'picked' above all others has been spared jail. Disturbing bodyworn camera footage shows Tracy Boateng, 27, lean in multiple times as she makes the inappropriate contact with Vincent Ojo at HMP Pentonville.

About the only time her name and 'lean' have probably ever featured in a sentence togather!

Boateng had admitted misconduct in a public office through engaging in an inappropriate relationship with Ojo between February 25 and April 19 last year. At Snaresbrook Crown Court today, the senior prison officer was handed a 12 month sentence, suspended for 24 months. Evidence against Boateng, who is from Dagenham (Ed: !!), included the bodyworn camera footage of the pair kissing and hugging, the court heard.

Yes, Reader, you read that right - she's so dim she elected to do this while wearing a body camera! 

Sentencing, Judge Caroline English... 

 I don't recognise the name, but wonder if she was the woefully progressive female judge that presided over the second trial I served on? 

...told her the 'exceptional' feature of the case was her three-month-old daughter and that Boateng had avoided prison because of the impact it could have on the young girl.

Can't help but feel the removal of such a parental influence could only be a good thing for the poor little mite... 

It’s OK Gaby, The Ones Smart Enough To Not Believe This Are Doing Just Fine…

Young people in line for good degrees from good Russell Group universities, who have for years obediently jumped through every hoop provided, are working in bars, going travelling, or despondently applying to companies that they know use AI not only to sift their CVs, but sometimes to conduct first interviews.Meanwhile LinkedIn – and yes, students have all been on LinkedIn for years – only feeds the gnawing fear that other people seemingly have their futures much more sorted, just as Instagram used to feed their teenage anxieties about who was going to all the parties.

Oh, weep! Weep for the students!  

Last year’s Institute of Student Employers recruitment survey recorded a ratio of 140 applications for every graduate job. Part of the reason for that deluge of applicants is perhaps because kids who suspect their forms won’t be read by humans anyway are using ChatGPT to fill in and fire them off en masse, to the point where AI is in effect talking to AI.

Well, the way things are going that’s a good grounding for the future work they will be taking up! 

It’s the betrayal that hurts. We drilled it into them that if they worked hard at school and made it into university then the world could be their oyster, but our stagnant economy just hasn’t generated enough graduate-level jobs to match – especially outside London, where we have simultaneously managed to ensure most of them can’t actually afford to live.

Well, the ones that saw this coming and took up a trade instead of a useless degree in grievance studies are earning a good living now. They were smart enough not to believe the hype.  

We can’t keep doing this to young people and then be surprised when they’re angry. If we keep whipping them through the education system on the promise their efforts will be rewarded, and then fail to deliver, sooner or later, the consequences will boomerang back on us.

What consequences will those be? More overqualified baristas in Starbucks?

Yes More Bus Carnage Leniency...

A bus driver who failed to brake and killed a 77-year-old woman has avoided jail as her sister pays a heartbreaking tribute. Almena Amica was using a pedestrian crossing to cross the road in the centre of Manchester when the bus accelerated and collided into her.

A further 11 people – a mixture of pedestrians and passengers - escaped with minor injuries as the single decker bus smashed into a café in Piccadilly Gardens on October 16, 2023.

I guess by this point, no-one's going to be surprised that no-one's seeing jail time...

Bus driver Khalid Mahmood was arrested at the scene a and while in custody maintained that the incident was as a result of a defected vehicle. A specialist forensic reconstruction officer conducted an extensive investigation and identified that this was not the case, with his report concluding that it was in fact a result of failure to apply the brakes.

He has today received a two year suspended sentence and has been disqualified from driving for five years.

He should have got more for lying alone. 

Sergeant Louise Warhurst from our Serious Collision Investigation Unit said: 'The impact of Mahmood's dangerous actions on Mena's family have been truly devastating and our thoughts are with her loved ones.'

My thoughts would have been more along the lines of 'What the hell is the point of this bloody job'... 

When I Don’t Hear English Spoken On My Morning Commute, What Else To Call Them?

Because I don't. Dozens of Eastern Europrean dialects, African and Indian languages, but very rarely the language of my countrymen. Even the Tube driver's announcements are in heavily African accented tones.

Every government needs an immigration policy and the one led by Sir Keir Starmer is no exception. Laws are required to establish the terms under which migration to the UK is allowed, and to deal with the complexities surrounding irregular arrivals. But the decision to publish an immigration white paper a week after Reform UK made significant gains in local elections, when it is riding high in national polls, is hard to defend. Rather than defusing public concerns, the prime minister risks playing into the hard right’s hands – and undermining the community cohesion he says he wants to protect.

Ah, that fictional ‘hard right’ again. Are they in the room with us now, ‘Guardian’ editorial writer? 

Some of the proposed measures are reasonable. Others are not. Visa rules are complicated and ministers have identified real concerns about the way the system works. But the timing and language, particularly the prime minister’s references to an “island of strangers” and forces “pulling our country apart”, were awful choices. The danger is that such rhetoric ends up reinforcing divisions and xenophobia.

Actually, I think it’s the actions of the immigrant community that’s reinforcing that. 

The pledge to deport more foreign criminals smacks of tabloid politics.

Because we all want foreign criminals to stay here for…reasons, I guess. 

Granting counter-terrorism-style powers to the Border Force risks stoking, not easing, fear.

I don’t think anyone expects them to use them, since they struggle to use the ones they currently have properly… 

Sir Keir’s anger about the Tories’ track record is justified. It harms democracy, and helps opportunists like Nigel Farage, when parties tell voters one thing while doing another. But past mistakes do not justify present ones. Migrants have been and will remain a vital part of the UK’s labour force and student bodies. The government and its MPs must highlight these positives clearly and loudly.

Highlight the positives as much as you want, the negatives are all around us and speaking much, much louder. 

You Need Therapy, Not Publicity!

A Southport survivor has called for a ban on pointed kitchen knives and revealed she is still too traumatised to use one herself following the horrific attack last year. Leanne Lucas, 36, was critically injured after she tried to protect innocent children from a knifeman who went on a rampage during a dance class on July 19.

I have immense sympathy for those who were subjected to this appalling attack, but no. Just no. Fuck off, even!  Typical brainwashed teacher, unable to call for the eradication of the real cause, stabby imports from the Third World.. 

Because of her chilling experience, Ms Lucas has set up a campaign calling for the adoption of round-tipped knives. Rudakubana attacked the dance class last year with one of two 20-centimetre kitchen knives he had bought on Amazon for £3.40 each, bypassing security checks. After her horrific experiences, the teacher had assumed there would be tighter controls around kitchen knives and was shocked to find there weren't.

She said: 'Every time I learnt something new, I’d think, "That doesn’t sound right. Surely there are laws in place so that couldn’t have happened." The more my eyes have been opened, the more I’ve been able to formulate an idea.'

A stupid and unworkable one, but hey, an idea’s an idea, I suppose!

She also credited actor Idris Elba's knife crime documentary (Ed; Oh, FFS!) for giving her the courage to launch her campaign.

She has the ‘courage’ to make an idiot of herself in public, but not to cook with sharp pointed objects?

...the brave teacher is launching Let's Be Blunt in conjunction with Knife Crime Awareness Week, and is calling for the widespread adoption of rounded kitchen knives. Ms Lucas is calling for all homes, manufacturers, retailers and the government to adopt the change and move away from pointed knives. She has suggested taking an inventory of all the sharp instruments in the home and explained that many will likely find more sharp knives than they had expected.

I won’t be doing this, I’m perfectly aware of how many pointed knives I have in the kitchen and I won’t be giving any of them up, no matter how sympathetic I might be towards the ordeal she experienced. 

Maybe Because We’re Suffering From Muslim Fatigue

In the southern French village of La Grand-Combe, Cissé, a 22-year-old carpenter originally from Mali, volunteered at his local mosque and was a familiar face among worshippers. So when he offered guidance through the prayers and rituals that Friday to a newcomer, a young man he did not know , it was an entirely natural gesture. The stranger, however, had come to prayers with very different intentions. As Cissé bowed in prostration, he was stabbed with a knife 57 times. The assailant then posted a video on Snapchat of his victim writhing in agony in a pool of blood. In the video, a man can be heard saying “I did it” and insulting Allah.

Hadn't heard of this - mainly because I’m not French, and I’m not dialed in to the constant stream of Muslim outrage.

Yet in France, this death – and apparent targeting of a Muslim worshipper – has not been unequivocally understood as a hate crime. Ongoing controversy around the case is a dismaying reminder of how institutionally Islamophobic France is.

So leave. It can’t be that bad or there wouldn’t be so many of you there… 

For more than a fortnight, there have been public protests at the inadequacy of the investigation, the biggest of which so far took place in Paris on Sunday.

Of course, protests are arranged at the drop of a hat.  

But, with some notable exceptions, in political and media circles more time has been devoted to debating whether a horrific killing in a place of worship deserves to be called “Islamophobic” than the terrifying implications of such violence for Europe’s biggest Muslim population.

What ‘terrifying implications’? It’s a murder. It’s not a start, is it? 

After three days on the run, the suspect, a 20-year-old French national named as Olivier H, gave himself up to police in Italy. The suspect’s lawyer denied that his client harboured any hatred towards “Muslims or mosques”. He has been charged in France with murder aggravated by premeditation on grounds of race or religion. Yet this was deemed insufficient to classify the case as a terrorist incident.

Yeah, the same thing happened here when an imported savage butchered three little English girls. At least the French government isn’t locking up any of those protesters, eh? 

The killing was an “isolated event”, the public prosecutor said, the suspect “driven by a violent urge, rather than ideology”.

Yes, that’s the immediate response these days from the authorities when they want to head off unrest.  

After Aboubakar Cissé’s brutal death, one might have expected the government to announce a plan to tackle Islamophobia. In reality, our political leaders are among its main drivers.

Oh, if only they were.  

Just Tell Them To Go Stuff Themselves....

...animal rights campaigners are demanding that a stuffed 8ft Bengal tiger from one of George V's big-game hunts in Asia should be removed from Bristol Museum, returned home and given a respectful burial.

🙄 

The big cat was shot by King Charles's great-grandfather during his infamous ten-day hunting trip to Nepal in 1911 when he proudly claimed he killed 21 tigers, eight rhinos and a bear, describing the cull afterwards as 'a record'. He added: 'I think it will be hard to beat.'

Different times… 

It can be seen crouching hidden in long grass in front of a painted mural by the wildlife artist Stanley Lloyd. The mural shows a bearded George V in a khaki safari outfit and pith helmet riding an elephant, with his shotgun poised ready to fire.

Err, no, ‘Mail’, I’m pretty sure - even without having visited the museum in question - it will have been a double rifle.  I doubt anyone was hunting tigers from elephant back with a shotgun!

Elisa Allen, from People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), says: 'Almost all animals stuffed and mounted were shot for sport or otherwise violently killed, and there are two ways to deal with this shameful past behaviour.

'Bury the dead respectfully, no matter how long it has been [since they died], just as we are returning human remains and artefacts to their countries of origin.'

Failing that, the museum should at the very least 'make sure the plaque describing [the animals] decries their horrific dispatch', she adds.

There’s actually three ways. We can just say ‘Well, that’s history’ and ignore PETA idiots. 

"...I would urge residents to refrain from speculating."

But it was speculation online that first alerted the authorities, wasn't it, Councillor Aiden? When it grew too large an issue to ignore?

Inspector Steve Parry, of the Basildon neighbourhood policing team, added: 'As a result of a number of reports relating to dogs which were made through the Action Fraud system, officers from our neighbourhood team have worked alongside colleagues in the RSPCA and Basildon Council to piece together actionable information. That work resulted in yesterday’s joint visit.

'At this stage, we believe we have found the remains of 37 dogs and about 20 live dogs which are now being cared for. The priority for all our partners is to locate their last-known owners.

'This is likely to be a complex and potentially far-reaching investigation and we don’t plan on giving a running commentary on it – but we will endeavour to keep the public informed on this investigation when it is appropriate to do so.'

What sort of place was this? 

Save A Paw takes in dogs from people who can no longer look after them or mistreated pets and offers to find them new owners in loving homes.

Surprisingly, given the area and subject matter, this didn't appear to be one to immediately pin on the Caravan Utilising Nomadic Tribes.... 

The rescue centre owner is Oaveed Rahman aka Obi Khan, who is in his 20s. An online biography states he has 'operated his one-man rescue... since late 2024. In the months since, he claims to have rehabilitated and rehomed dozens of reactive large-breed dogs'.

I think his idea of 'rehabilitation' (though certainly effective) might differ from that understood by the pitnutters... 

Who Says University Won't Learn Ya Nuthin'..?

You'll never guess....

Alligators are armored apex predators, with railroad-spike teeth and a bite force without peer in today's world. They have survived for millions of years almost entirely unchanged, because they are the perfect killing machine and absolutely dominant in their environment.

So, how can we, rather soft, squishy humans, avoid being the target of one of these monstrous beets? (sic) Well, fortunately for us, a study from the University of Florida has the answer for reducing our risk of alligator attack:

Stay away from alligators.

 Well, I never! 

H/T: The Jannie via email

Tell Us Again How They Are 'Friends And Neighbours' That We Need In The UK, Progressives....

The outpouring of rage on the Left at Starmer's remarks on immigration hasn't stopped, with the sort of people who never suffer the downsides of unrestricted immigration all rushing to put in their two pennorth on the 'benefits', like these morons:

Well, let’s see how this works out for those unfortunate enough not to be able to escape the diversity, shall we?

A terrified pensioner tormented for five years by youths was killed by two teenagers who threw a firework through his broken window, a court has heard. Robert Price, 76, died from burns and smoke inhalation at the blaze at his home in Oval Road North, Dagenham, on July 27, 2024. Nathan Otitodilchukwu, 18, and a 16-year-old, who cannot be named for legal reasons, admitted manslaughter.

Want to bet the unnamed accomplice also has a name that looks like mum reached into a bag of Scrabble tiles? 

Mr Price had the early signs of dementia and had been targeted so much by local youths that all his ground floor windows had been boarded up, the Old Bailey heard.

Because that was easier than dealing with the reasons for having to board them up, and he was just a vulnerable pensioner after all, he probably didn’t need natural light, eh? 

Otitodilchukwu is heard on Ring doorbell footage saying: 'Gonna f***ing torch this n*****', 'Yo, you f***ing paedo', 'yo you f***ing d***head' ' 'We are gonna f**k you up,' before running away.

Charming. And thankfully stupid, as so many of them prove to be. Not a future engineer or architect. 

Hours before the attack, footage shows Otitodilchukwu, who was living in care, meeting up with the 16-year-old boy. They filmed themselves launching a firework into a lake, the court was told. When Otitodilchukwu found out that Mr Price had died, messages were found on his phone saying: 'He was a paedo anyway' and 'I am getting 20 years for this anyway'.

Oh, if only! Followed by immediate deportation for you and any of your family still here. 

Otitodilchukwu has a conviction for admitting possession of a bladed article in September 2023. He was convicted in June 2024 of possessing an offensive weapon in March 2024 and was therefore subject to a youth rehabilitation order at the time of the killing of Mr Price.

That worked well then…. 

What Happened To The Classic Englishman Explorer?

I’ve been in situations where I’ve heard the bear pump-priming itself with oxygen as it prepares to launch itself for the kill – the heavy breathing sounds like a London tube train. That’s when you’ve got to use your firearm to maximum effect – holding your nerve and firing immediately above its head.

Ummm, dude, I really don't think you understand what 'maximum effect' means... 

It’s Not Just Your Man She’ll Take…

A woman who stole more than £600,000 from the Hampshire branch of a medical equipment manufacturer in an elaborate “Ponzi-like” fraud scheme has been jailed.

Jolene Groves' actions meant four years in jail for her, and redundancy for 125 of her colleagues. Dolly never considered that, did she?

Maybe Not, But Failing To Proofread Should Be....

Unless 'baclony' is one of those odd Noo Yawk processed meat products?

Sunday Funnies...

Seems only fitting, after Eurovision Night, we have a singalong....

We’re Taking Our Ladyballs And Going Home!

Four of the UK's largest Pride organisations have suspended political parties' involvement in their events in "unequivocal solidarity" with the transgender community. Birmingham, Brighton, London and Manchester Prides announced that political parties would not be welcome at their events in an official capacity until they demonstrated a "tangible commitment to trans rights".

In other words, the ‘right’ of mentally ill men to call themselves women and use women’s services and play on women’s sports teams. Rights they should never have been granted in the first place. 

The announcement comes after the Supreme Court ruled that the term "woman" in the Equality Act was defined by biological sex. The ruling was welcomed by some campaigners representing lesbian, gay and bisexual people who say it protects single-sex groups, while others shared concerns about the impact on the trans community. A statement from the group of Pride organisers said there was a "disturbing global trend... where LGBTQ+ rights are being systematically rolled back".

I haven’t seen any such rights being rolled back - no one is calling for gay marriage to be scrapped, are they? No one is demanding that gays should be prevented from serving in the military again. 

Call it what it is.

You Spelled ‘Hamas’ Wrong, ‘Guardian’

Hamas can stop this horror. They can release any of the hostages that are still alive and lay down their weapons.

“Seldom have I heard the leader of a state so clearly outline a plan that fits the legal definition of genocide,” said Josep Borrell, the former EU foreign affairs chief. The international court of justice ruled in January last year that there was a “plausible risk” of genocide. Amnesty International, a UN special committee and leading scholars, including within Israel, have concluded that genocide is taking place.

And you're angry about it because its the 'wrong' side? 

Openly envisioning the total destruction of Gaza, pursuing the removal of its population as a goal rather than a battlefield consequence, and destroying the means by which life is sustained, looks not merely like brutality but a deliberate project of elimination.

I wonder why the rest of the Muslim world isn't making as much of a fuss about it as the white progressives? Or offering safe refuge?

Egypt and Jordan have refused to accept refugees, saying that they would otherwise be complicit in war crimes.

Oh, never mind. I just remembered why they aren't doing that...

They Don’t Exactly Start Out From A Good Place, Do They?

The lives of transgender people in the UK are at risk of being made “unliveable”, Nicola Sturgeon has said in her first public comments about the supreme court ruling on the legal definition of a woman, which was prompted by legislation she oversaw in the Scottish parliament.

If you wonder why she hadn’t commented until now, maybe it’s because she knew she couldn’t say anything without being exposed even further as an idiot… 

Sturgeon said the supreme court’s ruling – “by very definition … the law of the land” – could not be questioned...

But then, the thick bitch went on to question it, of course! 

...but expressed profound concerns about interim advice published by the Equality and Human Rights Commission amounting to a blanket ban on trans people using toilets and other services of the gender they identify as.

They should never have been allowed to in the first place. The SC verdict just restored normality.  

“I would be very concerned if that interim guidance became the final guidance and I hope that is not the case because I think that potentially makes the lives of trans people almost unliveable.

They don’t appear to find them liveable even when they are getting every single whim pandered to…. 

“It certainly doesn’t make a single woman any safer to do that because the threat to women comes from predatory and abusive men.”

Like those predatory and abusive men who want to dress up as women to get their rocks off by trespassing on female spaces with the approval of the State, Nicola? 

After this unprecedented veto, Sturgeon accused some opponents of the bill of using women’s rights as a “cloak of acceptability to cover up what is transphobia”, telling the NewsAgents podcast that some critics of the legislation were also “deeply misogynist, often homophobic, possibly some of them racist as well”.

Some of them probably put sugar instead of salt on their porridge too! 🤣 

A Story Where You Can Almost Hear The Duelling Banjos As You Read It...

An Ohio woman was arrested after her pet raccoon was found holding a meth pipe to its mouth in her car during a routine traffic stop.

Wha..? 

Victoria Vidal, 55, was pulled over in Akron by a Springfield Township Police officer on Monday after it was determined that she had an active warrant and a suspended driver's license, according to a post from the department. Upon approaching the vehicle, an officer 'made contact with the driver,' who was then detained 'without incident,' the post stated.

Makes a nice change for them. 

'However, things took an unusual turn' when the officer returned to Vidal's car, the police department said. According to police, 'he observed a raccoon named "Chewy" sitting in the driver's seat with a meth pipe in its mouth.'

'Chewy had somehow gotten hold of a glass methamphetamine pipe, leading officers to further inspect the vehicle,' the post continued. The discovery prompted a search of the vehicle that turned up a significant quantity of meth, crack cocaine and three used glass pipes, police said.

Looks like Chewy is more rat than raccoon!  

Do You Want Trump Forever? This Is How To Get Him…

And if you've never heard of Huck Gutman, like me, well, you can probably imagine what his 'solutions' will be when I tell you he was a former chief of staff to Senator Bernie Sanders and emeritus professor at the University of Vermont...

Those who fight for the future of our nation need to fight not just against threats, but for a just and equitable future. Too often the well-deserved plaudits for those who fight against do not extend to articulating a program of what the American nation needs, in addition to democratic institutions.

Here are five specific suggestions for what we should be fighting for.

Oh boy! Let me get my popcorn! 

First, the nation needs a new minimum wage, a living wage, not the residue of 1938 legislation called the Fair Labor Standards Act. No one can live on $7.25 an hour, which translates to about $15,000 a year.

Oh, wouldn’t it have been nice if the first suggestion hadn’t been something that’s been discredited every time it’s been tried? Socialists, eh? 🤷‍♀️

Second, Americans deserve healthcare as a right. A Medicare for All system would extend healthcare to every person. Its cost would be more than offset by eliminating the 25% of healthcare spending that goes for overhead in our private-insurance-dominated system.Cutting $1tn of needless bureaucratic expenses and bill-keeping would ensure that we have the money to provide healthcare to everyone.

Ah, so, give America the NHS? Which is such a raging success here, and would never lead to needless bureaucratic expense…

Third, Americans should find it easy to join unions if they wish. The decline in unionization is a major reason why, as the wealthy get ever wealthier, wages have been flat or declining for almost 50 years.

Wages are flat or declining because we are finding new ways to get things done, ways that don’t rely on manpower. It’s called ‘progress’.

Fourth, we need to increase taxes on the wealthy. There is no reason that Warren Buffett, as he has said, should pay a lower tax rate than his secretary.

And there was no reason Buffett couldn’t write a cheque - sorry, ‘cut a check’ in your vernacular- to the US Treasury for the difference, if he felt that strongly about it. Did he?

Fifth, we should reverse the deeply damaging Citizens United decision, which enabled the wealthy and their special interests to buy elections.

Because now someone outside of your clique has done it, Huck?

The same old tired socialist ‘ideas’ that American voters rejected. Couldn’t you have found five that they might want? OK, maybe you can’t get Trump again, but keep pushing this stuff and you’ll just get someone like him next time.

Liars, Liars, Pants On Fire

There is very little evidence that protections for nature are a blocker to development, the government has admitted in its own impact assessment of the controversial new planning and infrastructure bill.

Is that an unfortunate development? Yes, Reader...for the government:

The analysis by Whitehall officials provides no data or research to back up the government’s central argument that it is environmental legislation that holds up building.

Oh dearie me… 

Ministers say the new bill will speed up housing developments and large infrastructure projects by allowing developers to avoid meeting environmental obligations to protect habitats and species such as barn owls, otters, bats and newts, at the site of their project, by paying into a central nature recovery fund (NRF) which will be used to create environmental improvement elsewhere.

And no, Reader, that isn’t the advantage it may sound: 

Officials admit this nature improvement could be in a different county to the place where the building is taking place, raising fears it will reduce access to nature.

And with Mayor Khant determined to increase urban sprawl to pack in more of his co-religionists at the expense of clean green safeguards, it’s only going to get worse in London. But who on earth is responsible for this lie about the blockers on development anyway?

...the central reason given by the government for the new legislation, that nature is a blocker to development – promoted by prime minister Keir Starmer, chancellor Rachel Reeves and housing secretary Angela Rayner – has been undermined by the government’s own impact assessment.

Ah. Of course. Three people who couldn’t lie straight in bed. 

Cover Me! 'The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face'

This month, it's one I didn't know was a cover until I started doing this, Roberta Flack's 'The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face', originally a Peggy Seeger song. 

That's A Lot Of Words To Say 'We Have To Obey The Law', Mark...

Representatives of Goal Diggers undertook a 12-mile walk from their training pitches in Haggerston Park to Wembley Stadium to deliver their open letter to the FA. In it they demanded a reversal of the ban on transgender women from women’s football and described the FA’s decision as a “pitiful and weak response” to the supreme court’s ruling.

And did the FA immediately capitulate? Reader, surprisingly they did not!

Mark Bullingham, the chief executive of the Football Association, has written to London grassroots football club Goal Diggers FC explaining the governing body’s decision to ban transgender women from women’s football “was not an ideological judgment, but a difficult decision” based on legal advice that a “change in policy was necessary” following the supreme court ruling which said the term “woman” in the Equality Act refers only to a biological woman.

So there! Of course, hiding behind the ‘big boys did it and ran away’ excuse, instead of coming out and saying ‘We should never have gone along with this nonsense in the first place!’ So brave… 

Goal Diggers player Becky Taylor-Gill (Ed: yes, Reader, just the sort of smug white liberal woman who you'd expect to find hurling gasoline on this fire so she can preen about her conscience) said the FA needs to stand more firmly with transgender women.

“Their motto is football for all. Put your money where your mouth is,” said Taylor-Gill. “Put your lawyers in the situation where they can fight for football to be for all.

Why should they lose money on an unwinnable case so men who dress up as women can get their kicks in the female dressing rooms, Becky? Given they are losing money already by aligning themselves with this wretched movement?

“We’ve created a safe space for trans women in our women’s team that we really cherish and they should feel welcomed. This decision will just push more trans women out of football at a time when that’s what they really need.”

Pushing men out of female spaces is only going to increase, because they never should have been in them in the first place. 

Employers! Do Your Due Diligence On Applicants' Social Media!

A nursery worker accused of abusing 24 babies left children crying and 'writhing around' in pain after repeatedly pinching, punching and grabbing them, a court heard today. 

Roksana Lecka, 22, is accused of 'badly harming' 23 of the infants, aged 18 months to two years, while she worked at a £1,900-a-month Montessori nursery in Twickenham, west London, between January 31 and June 28 last year.

Oh, if only there’d been some clue, maybe something on her social media that’s going to indicate to employers that she’s an incorrigible narcissistic person who probably has little interest in child nurturing, no matter what bullshit she’s put on her CV? 

You know, like the ‘Mail’ managed to find for this article?

Opening the case against Lecka, prosecutor Tracy Ayling KC told jurors that the defendant started working at the Montessori nursery on January 31 2024 and that there were 'no apparent safeguarding concerns'. Lecka was someone who 'came across as somebody who would work hard and interact well with the children', she said.

There were, actually, Tracy, but no one appears to have recognised them for what they were…. 

The trial, expected to last up to five weeks, continues.

Five weeks?!? 

I Fail To See Why The Taxpayer Should Be On The Hook For This…

Remember the arrest of the thugs throwing furniture from the top floor of Stratford Westfield? I thought the charges not being attempted murder we’re a big slap in the face, but turns out the wretchedly incompetent justice system had more in store:

The youth court hearing at Stratford Magistrates' Court was adjourned by magistrate Aneeta Prem until 21 May without any pleas being entered, as both sets of the boys' parents required interpreters.

And why should that mean that the taxpayer has to stump up for them? If they can’t understand what’s going on, who cares? They aren't on trial (though maybe they should be).

The little shits on trial can’t be named, of course. So name the damn parents - if we have to pay for them, we should be entitled to know who they are…

Recycling Old Ideas..?

Well, why not? We were cheated out of what would have been a stunning creation, so why not 'rebadge' it?

Shortlisted ideas for the Queen Elizabeth II national memorial were unveiled today, including a bronze cast of a Windsor oak tree and a giant canopy of stone lily pads. Other ideas include audio installations with the late Queen's voice and a statue of her next to Prince Philip, and a 'graceful and strong' stone bridge with cascading water.

It's the Heatherwick option that I favour out of all of them: 

2. Heatherwick Studio Bridge of Togetherness - A memorial walk inspired by the idea of 'togetherness' with 70 lily pad stepping stones by Heatherwick Studio with sculptor and ceramicist Halima Cassell, MRG Studio, Webb Yates and Arup. At the centre of the bridge is a limestone sculpture of the late Queen, whose childhood nickname was Lilibet, protected by a giant canopy of eight carved sculptural lily pads, with the stone chosen because it will 'age with dignity'.

Please, no more equestrian statues or hideous modern art! Let this win! 

“Free speech is clearly under attack. Nobody is really safe… the public needs to see what’s happening, and be shocked.”

So why aren't they? Do they think this sort of thing won't happen to them?

Julian Foulkes, from Gillingham in Kent, was handcuffed at his home by six officers from Kent Police – the force he had served for a decade – after challenging a supporter of pro-Palestinian marches on X. Police body-worn camera footage captured officers scrutinising the 71-year-old’s collection of books by authors such as Douglas Murray, a Telegraph contributor, and issues of The Spectator, pointing to what they described as “very Brexity things”.

I spent Saturday binge watching 'Zero Day' on Netflix, and the reaction of the American people to Bob De Niro's character getting a bit too fascist in his hunt for cyberterrorists was quite a contrast to the supine way the UK public treat outrages like these ones. Yes, it is fiction, but my god....

Mr Foulkes’s house was searched, with officers seizing his electronic devices and removing them to a waiting police van. Officers also rifled through his most personal belongings.After his home was searched, the retired special constable was locked in a police cell for eight hours and interrogated on suspicion of malicious communications.

And I think no-one really knows how they'd cope with that, or what they'd do to get out, no matter how wise in the ways of the law they might be... 

Fearing that further escalation could impact his ability to visit his surviving daughter, who lives in Australia, he accepted a caution despite having committed no offence.

Hard to blame him. 

The incident took place in November 2023. This week, Kent Police admitted the caution was a mistake and deleted it from Mr Foulkes’s record.

Because of the 'Telegraph's interest? 

On Saturday, a Kent Police spokesman told The Telegraph the force had “concluded that the caution against Mr Foulkes was not appropriate in the circumstances and should not have been issued”. The spokesman said “Kent Police expunged the caution from the man’s record and was pleased to facilitate this correction”, adding that a further review of the matter would now be carried out “to identify any learning opportunities”.

Ah, if only. They appear incapable of that. 

A Home Office spokesman said: “This incident occurred under the previous government.

A (nominally) Conservative government, remember. 

H/T: Chris Parry via Twitter

Trump Was Right - Again!

'Hi, my name is Anigar Monsee, and I’m a single mother doing my best to raise my daughter on my own,' wrote Monsee, a Liberian national who now lives in Delaware.

'Right now, I’m facing the most terrifying moment of my life—I may be sent to jail or even deported over something I never imagined would put our lives in jeopardy: cooking traditional meals with animals like chicken and frog,' she continued.

Not quite true, dear, you were convicted of felony animal cruelty by recording vile YouTube videos for cash from perverts, which could get you seven years behind bars...

So far, the fundraiser has collected just $322 of its $10,000 goal.

Heh! Even the usual suspects who will happily reward one of their number for murder are so revolted by this they aren’t putting their hands in their pockets.

President Donald Trump has cracked down hard on immigration since entering office in January. He is also taking a hard line against those in the US on visas caught committing crimes.

He said they were eating the pets. And the liberals laughed. Are they laughing now? 

Well, Gave Me A Chuckle....

Always topical, is Matt....

You Just Can't Trust These Pointy-Ears, Can You?

 

Or is it just an unfortunate typo, and not the beginning of the faerie uprising?

Sunday Funnies...

Are there any non-preachy Hollywood movies, then?

Maybe He Was In The Wrong Job?

A doctor who claimed he hid spycams in bathroom air fresheners because he wanted to compare his 'small penis' with other men has been jailed.

He couldn't simply specialise in urology then? 

Yu Young Um, 34, secretly recorded over 24 people over the course of more than three years as they went to the toilet in a Scotland Airbnb and at staff accommodation. The anaesthetist was found guilty of 23 charges in April following a trial at Glasgow Sheriff Court and jailed for 18 months on Thursday, the Crown Office said.

Scotland again! Are they all perverts up there? 

Yu Young Um was also found guilty of covertly filming people in private situations within staff accommodation at Dumfries and Galloway Royal Infirmary.

If he'd pretended to be a transgender something or other,  he could have skipped the secrecy and entered as many private areas as he wanted, of course... 

A total of 21 men and nine women, four of whom were doctors, were filmed by Yu Young Um, who was diagnosed as having a form of body dysmorphia following his arrest.

And it seems we've found a form of body dysmorphia the Scottish NHS won't tolerate or excuse. For once.  

But You Don’t Have Female Anatomy, You Just Have A Simulacram Of It

The UK's only ever judge to publicly say they are transgender is planning to take the government to the European Court of Human Rights over the Supreme Court's ground-breaking ruling on biological sex.

Dr Victoria McCloud, who stepped down from court last year, said the judgement and equality watchdog's new guidance violated her human rights and she felt "contained and segregated".

So, no longer 'Britain's transgender judge' then? 

"[This judgement] has left me two sexes at once, which is a nonsense and ironic, because the Supreme Court said that sex was binary," said Dr McCloud. "I am a woman for all purposes in law, but [now under this judgement] I'm a man for the Equality Act 2010. So I have to probably guess on any given occasion which sex I am."

Shouldn't be difficult, you've got a mirror, I presume? 

Dr McCloud believes dangerous predators could exploit this confusion to further target women.

But dangerous predators have already been using these sorts of situations to do this, and we never heard a peep out of you then, did we? Not even over the most egregious cases of men infiltrating women's spaces. 

"This is going to make matters much, much more dangerous," she said. "I am now expected to use male spaces.

Why not? You are, after all, male. The Supreme Court has declared you to be male. Surely you aren't suggesting the highest court in the land should be disobeyed, are you?

"I have female anatomy."

 No, you don’t. You have a plastic surgeon’s approximation of female organs. Claiming otherwise is like Douglas Bader claiming he has two legs.

It isn't safe for women to use the men's loos. It is as simple as that."

Why not? You’ve been pushing for men like you to be in the women's ones, haven’t you?

Down These Mean Cyberstreets, A Man Must Go....

Professor Clare McGlynn, a law expert at Durham University, branded the metaverse a 'ticking time bomb' and warned that the number of sex attacks is set to 'explode' in the next few years.

Eh? Playing computer games is causing sexual assaults and rapes? 

Apparently so, Reader, but not real ones.  

Her paper, published in the Oxford Journal of Legal Studies, found that a rising toll of 'meta-rapes' are going unpunished in the unregulated digital spaces. It cites a police investigation after a teenager was 'gang-raped', with officers concluding that she suffered the same psychological trauma as a real-life victim.

Ah, yes, I thought it sounded familiar.  We've never heard the outcome of that case, have we?

Professor McGlynn's study, with Carlotta Rigotti of Leiden University in the Netherlands, proposes that existing laws should be applied to 'appropriate cases of meta-rape'.

Female wacademics, what would we do without them.... 

This Is Not Justice, And Will Not Help Recruitment Of Teaching Staff

A schoolgirl has been detained for 15 years for attempting to murder two teachers and a pupil by stabbing them with a blade at a school in south Wales. The girl, who was 13 at the time, attacked Fiona Elias and Liz Hopkin and the pupil during a breaktime at Ysgol Dyffryn Aman in Ammanford, Carmarthenshire. She had admitted three counts of wounding with intent and a further count of possession of a bladed article at a school but denied the attempted murders. However, she was found guilty of the offences by a jury at Swansea crown court.

It doesn't appear to have been a tough decision for the jury... 

The girl, who cannot be named, will be eligible for release on licence after serving half of the sentence but the judge, Paul Thomas KC, told her she could be recalled to custody if she behaved badly again once freed.

'Behaved badly'..? She's not been found guilty of playing knock down ginger or scrumping apples, has she? 

After the stabbing, the teenager told police officers: “That’s one way to be a celebrity,” adding: “I’m pretty sure this is going to be on the news, so more eyes are going to be looking at me.”

And her rampage didn't stop once she was caught. 

Thomas said the girl had made a “serious threat” to someone while being held in custody after the attacks and accepted she would pose a “potential risk” when she was finally released. He said: “A lot depends on how you change and mature and that can’t be predicted at the moment.”

Then why take the chance? Oh, but you aren't, are you? You're going to let the public take it, as always. 

Caroline Rees KC, defending, said the girl had difficulty expressing emotions but had expressed remorse. She said she was a “very complicated” child who had suffered “significant adversity” and had “slipped through the net”. But Rees said: “She is so young there is a possibility for change.”

Is there really?