Thursday 29 October 2015

Not So Serious That You’ll Actually Arrest Someone..?

A police spokesman said: “This is a serious incident which has left somebody with a nasty injury.”
I’ll say! The photo looks like the poor old girl has suffered a shark attack!
Officers said it attacked the woman’s right forearm after she mistook it for a neighbour’s dog and reached to pet it.
The victim was taken to Blackpool Victoria Hospital before being transferred to Royal Preston Hospital for specialist treatment.
Officers said the dog’s owner was not arrested and agreed to hand the pet over to the police and a council dog warden to be put down.
Because, let’s face it, he can always get another four-legged assault weapon pretty cheaply.
Ivor Bould, chairman of Fleetwood Neighbourhood Watch, said: “Ever since the demolition of the high-rise flats in Blackpool people have moved down here and the number of dogs has trebled.
“It’s frightening because, looking at some of them, I’m not 100 per cent sure they’re not status symbols.”
The attack bears a resemblance to one that happened in South Shore last week, when mechanic Rob Lloyd warned ‘a child could be next’ after a husky-type dog attacked his chocolate Labrador.
Long past time the council and police started clamping down on chavs and their mutts, then.

3 comments:

Salamander said...

The lesson here is that if you want to assault someone, just buy a dog and let the dog do it. The dog will take the rap and you get to pretend that you are a big tough warrior when you order a pint in your local.

Isn't it time we populated Mars? Surely a Martian colony will need a supply of cheap labour and we seem to have quantity of chavs here that would be just perfect for the job.

James Higham said...

Especially the chavs.

JuliaM said...

"The lesson here is that if you want to assault someone, just buy a dog and let the dog do it."

The criminal classes are always more than one step ahead of the justice system... :/

"Especially the chavs."

*nods*