Tweet Of The Month

September was a bumper harvest indeed!

Post Title Of The Month

Fahrenheit211's take on the Trudeau faux-pas:

/applause

Reigning champion Tim rallies, but doesn't quite get it over the net:

Quote Of The Month

DumbJon rips into the modern 'Conservatives':

As bad as the Supreme Court's Screw Brexit decision is - pretty bad considering it appears to be based on the well known legal doctrine of 'because we say so' - it's almost as bad listening to Professional Conservatives claiming to be shocked, shocked, to find that the courts are a lawless, politicised mess. Yes, indeed, who could have seen that coming?

Just a thought, but if you keep demonstrating a proven inability to predict outbreaks of heavy drinking on December 31st, you might want to rethink your claim to be super smart. As it is, real conservatives have spent years calling the shot and the pocket, while the genius set have called them crazed conspiracy nuts. Now Brenda Hale has done the legal equivalent of gobbling down a live mouse on TV while addressing the public as 'you warm bloods' then ripping the flesh off her face to reveal the scales underneath, I think we may have to look again at what definition of genius we're using here.

Post Of The Month

Longrider on St Greta and the impossible demands of children...

And Yet She Could Afford The Air Fare...

Non-British patients who do not have a European Health Insurance Card (EHIC) are charged for the care they receive in this country because they are not contributing to the UK through tax.

Yes. And...?

But for some, like Nigerian grandmother Grace Umoru, the price of this care can be a huge and unexpected burden.

No doubt. But what's her story?

Mrs Umoru came to Bolton in June to see her son-in-law Jamal Ohiobugie and her granddaughter after being treated by doctors in her home of Edo State for a recurring wound to her leg.

However, once arriving in the UK, Mr Ohiobugie realised that his mother’s injury was much worse than previously thought and she was rushed to the Royal Bolton Hospital for urgent treatment.

Hmmm...

Doctors were able to save the limb and the 59-year-old is now recovering but the family have received a bill for £3,500 which they cannot afford.

However, for Mr Ohiobugie and his family, there is no question of not paying this bill despite their fincanicl (sic) troubles.

No question, haters! This family doesn't live off the generosity of others!

He has now turned to campaigning site GoFundMe in the hope that charitable individuals will donate to help with his mother’s cause.

*rolls eyes*

H/T: BannedCow via Twitter

"Hey, Ed, What's A Baby Walrus Called..?"

"I dunno, what am I, Sir David Attenborough?"

H/T: Stephen Brown via email

Ooh, Land Rover Have A New Model Out...

...but if it's getting into fenderbenders all on its own, I don't think I want one!

Sunday Funnies...

Wait, how on earth did they narrow it down to just five...?

Perhaps It's Time They Were..?

Whew! That makes everything OK, then. Just ignore the fact a woman was savaged to death in her own house by her own 'pets' who even the authorities struggled to contain at the scene...

Mum-of-three Elayne Stanley, 44, died after being attacked by two American Bulldogs at the house in Graham Road, Widnes, Cheshire, on Tuesday evening.

One dog was shot at the scene and, on Friday, police confirmed the second dog had also been destroyed.

Why were both not shot then and there on the scene? Why even attempt to tranquilise the other?

Inquiries are ongoing into the woman's death but no arrests have been made, police have said. Ms Stanley's family are currently being supported by specialist officers.

If a woman chooses to keep two large, potentially-killer dogs, and the inevitable happens, why should we lavish State care on her relatives? Will it continue after the inevitable #chavshrine send off?

And why have no arrests been made?

Now, Paul Leigh, Elayne's former partner, who used to own the dogs, said they had never been aggressive in his experience with them."

Ah. That's handy, isn't it? Otherwise, if you admitted ownership, you might be getting your collar felt. 

Priorities...

All Britain's 11million cats would have to be microchipped under Government plans.

The modern Tory Party will safeguard your pussy, citizen! Whether you like it or not...

Now, don't get me wrong, I have three indoor-only cats and one occasionally-outdoor cat, and they are all chipped. Because why not? It provides peace of mind.

But to enforce it on everyone? Madness! Nor is it the only whacky bunny-hugger idea: 

The plan is one of a range of animal welfare measures to be put forward at the Conservative Party conference today.

A ban on keeping monkeys as pets and stopping live exports of farm animals for slaughter are also on the cards.

Hunters will be banned from importing endangered animals shot overseas – a measure promoted by Boris Johnson's girlfriend, Carrie Symonds.

See, the modern Tory Party will even safeguard dead animals! How about that!

David Bowles of the RSPCA said mandatory microchipping was a positive step, even if enforcement could be difficult.

Horses should be all microchipped and tattooed - why not start with them, before moving on to cats. Is it because you know damned well where all the unchipped ones are?

But you'll be turning up mob-handed at 89 year old Mrs Smith's door to make sure her little tabby complies with government regulations, I'll bet...

At this stage, as DumbJon nevers tires of pointing out, just what makes this Conservative Party in any way, shape or form conservative..?