Wednesday, 22 November 2017

Never Ask A Question To Which You Don't Know The Answer...

...I thought that was the first thing barristers were taught?
Giving evidence, Pc Kinsey confirmed that police attended and searched the premises.
Upon entering a shed in the back garden, the officer said he saw “lots of blood splatters” on the wall and “fresh breast feathers” on the floor.
Under cross-examination, when the officer was asked if he was an “expert in feathers”, he confirmed he had a lifelong hobby of keeping chickens.
Heh!

11 comments:

jack ketch said...

Police officers must live for such moments! Wish I could have seen the brief's boat race. Classic!

Anonymous said...

"Are all plod fowl liars?" Let us hope you know the answer to that question, JuliaM.

DJ said...

Surely the real question is what was the next question going to be if he'd said 'no'?

Was the barrister really going to try and claim they were from a fugitive turkey hiding out until December 26th?

James Higham said...

Mr Asab, Akhtar Hussain.

Fahrenheit211 said...

Manor Park used to be such a nice area mostly English with a smattering of Hindus Sikhs Irish and other integrated hard working migrants. Now Manor Park is an Islamised shithole full of dole bludging Muslim animal abusers. I suppose the cockerels must count themselves lucky that the Muslims are only fighting them and not buggering them.

Andrew Scarborough said...

211°, how else do you think they got them into the fighting mood?

selsey.steve said...

"Mr Hussain, Mohamed Arif, 43, of Fairfield Road, Ilford; ; Mehtab Ahmed, 41, of Celebration Way, Chingford; Altaf Hussain, 54, of Parkstone Road, Coventry, and a 17-year-old who cannot be named, are all charged with being present at an animal fight involving cockerels."
Says it all, really.

Ted Treen said...

I'm just waiting for some enterprising plod to enquire of a brief "Is it still your custom to habitually consort with known criminals?". It seems a fair question.

Pcar said...

@DJ

ROFL - or goose :)

.
@JuliaM

H/T More Multi-culti enrichment
"Married Pakistani doctor, 44, who molested student nurse, 21, then blamed it on 'different cultural norms' in the UK gets to keep his job"
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5106709/Doctor-molested-nurse-gets-job.html

H/T Another absurd prosecution - drunk man sleeps on road, driver who ran over him at 2.35am on trial.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5107115/Taxi-driver-thought-student-ran-bin-bag.html

Barman said...

Reminds me of a story a policeman friend told me years ago.

He was in court as a witness to the prosecution of some dangerous driving offence. He said that he had estimated that the driver was doing more than 50mph.

Brief: How can you be sure he was driving at more than 50mph?
Police: Because I have 30 years driving experience in a wide variety of vehicles, am a Master Driving Instructor, etc. etc.
Brief: *throws pencil across court* Can you tell me how fast that was going then?
Policemen: No.
Brief: Why not, I thought you were an experienced driver and could estimate the speed of my client's car?
Policeman: I've never driven a pencil!

JuliaM said...

"Wish I could have seen the brief's boat race."

Me too!

"Surely the real question is what was the next question going to be if he'd said 'no'? "

I wonder if he had an alternative explanation in mind, or was he just going to wing it? ;)

"I suppose the cockerels must count themselves lucky that the Muslims are only fighting them and not buggering them."

Eeeew!

"Another absurd prosecution - drunk man sleeps on road, driver who ran over him at 2.35am on trial."

Good lord!

"Policeman: I've never driven a pencil!"

LOL!!