#GenerationSnowflake Finds Paid Work!

...mostly, it seems, finds it beneath their dignity:

I've been working in the room-service department of a five-star hotel for six months.

Good going! Want a cookie?

...the beauty of our service is that all guests are treated equally as nicely — whether we like you or not.

Errr, well, yes. Why is that a surprising concept?

Saying that, your hotel experience will be much more enjoyable if we do like you. So here are some important do's and don'ts for your next stay, from the girl who brings you breakfast and restocks your mini bar.

Important, eh?

Delivering breakfast to people who are half-dressed (or worse) is not really how I like to start my day.

Well, perhaps you should have found another job?

Comment on the weather, ask how our day is going, or tell us about your stay so far. This is a great way for us to assess how happy our guests are.

Is that a big concern for you then? It really doesn't sound as if it is...

Although I'm sure my managers feel otherwise, I don't like it when guests take items from their mini bars.

Ummm, what? You do know the inflated prices on those things help to fund your wages, right?

The mini bars in each room of our hotel contain over 20 different kinds of snacks and drinks, and I'm in charge of restocking them — meaning that I have to review a master list in every single one of our 144 rooms every day to figure out if anything's missing.

Then, I have to bring the items to each room via a very badly designed, top-heavy cart, or, if it's not on the cart, I have to run across the entire hotel to get it from the supply closet. This whole process can take over three hours.

Oh noes! You poor little darling! The horror..!

No-one told me there'd be restocking involved!

Some people are overly critical, but others are afraid to speak up if they aren't satisfied. As long as you tell us nicely, we really do want to hear if there's something we can do to make your stay more pleasant.

OK. love, here goes. REFILL THE BLOODY MINIBAR WITHOUT WHINING!

There. How's that?

It’s Instructive…

Oh, gosh!

And who is Farhia? Is she a property owner who faces compulsory purchase to build a vanity project like HS2, perhaps?

Well, no. Of course not! When would someone like that ever draw the attention, not to mention the sympathy, of a ‘Guardian’ columnist?

Farhia settled in north Fulham in 1999 after fleeing Somalia's civil war. Seeking asylum, she was granted indefinite leave to stay in Britain.

Just the sort of person a ‘Guardian’ columnist would fawn over!

Farhia's part of the estate is earmarked for Phase Two of the demolition schedule, which could be several years off if it occurs at all. But her need for stability and security is a recurring theme. With the help of an interpreter, a fellow estate resident, Farhia explained to me that she likes the area, values the friends she has nearby, and is happy with the local schools her four sons attend.

She’s been here eleven years and she can’t speak English? Goodness, she really values her roots in Fulham, doesn’t she?

What about the council's insistence that the redevelopment will generate thousands of new jobs, opening up avenues of prosperity for all residents, including the up and coming young? Such improvements would be welcome, Farhia thinks. But why do they require knocking down her home?

It’s not, though, is it? Her home is in Somalia…

Meanwhile, in South Norwood, completely unobserved by ‘Guardian’ columnists:

Elderly tenants of Tonbridge House, a sheltered housing block in Penge Road, South Norwood, learned last week their homes had been targeted to help tackle the borough's housing crisis and reduce the number of families in bed-and-breakfast accommodation.

Yes, you read that right – the council wants to decant pensioners to house the ‘homeless’. Probably more people like Farhia…

William Ramsey, 80, who has lived there 14 years, said: "To try to remove these people from their own homes, I strongly feel it is an infringement of our human rights. Surely you are allowed to take the last few years of your life with a bit of peace?"

Donald Donaldson, 82, said: "I don't want to move. I have lived here for 18 years and I love living here. I feel we are being bullied."

But no-one’s listening, William & Donald. There’ll be no searing ‘Guardian’ exposes of your plight.

You’re just too….well, unsympathetic, I suppose.

London Marathon...

Yes, it's the day of the London Marathon. Not something I normally pay attention to but in this case, I'll be watching out for one runner in particular.

A 75-year-old carer with terminal bone cancer said she is determined to complete her 10th London Marathon - but will not be running.

Daphne Hathaway, from Norfolk, who looks after her husband who has Alzheimer's Disease, has been told running could lead to bone fractures, so she will be walking the route.

Truly, our finest generation. Godspeed, Daphne!

Via CJ Nerd, by email.

Why Does Remembrance Day Always Bring Out The Worst In Some People?

First, we have the now-obligatory 'no shaking of tins! warning from the Charity Commission, despite high street chuggers seemingly allowed free license:

Poppy sellers from the Royal British Legion have been banned from shaking their collection tins in case they are seen as a 'public menace'.

Asking anyone if they want to buy one and even approaching people have also been declared illegal.

Instead volunteers have been told they must remain still and silent or face being removed from their stands or prosecuted.

And as if that wasn't bad enough...

Landlady Bernice Walsh, of The Windmill, in Weald, Kent, told former RAF serviceman David Marchant that people could buy poppies 'somewhere else' when he asked her permission to leave a poppy tray in her pub.

Happily, this has now sparked a boycott of the pub.

Another villager, who did not want to be named, said: 'It's a shame because people in the village want to support her, but she keeps rubbing people up the wrong way.

'We need a pub - it was closed for six months and then she came and everyone was really pleased about it, but immediately she banned dogs and it's a village pub and people lilke to take their dogs in so it's upset an awful lot of people.'

Seriously, why would you open a business like a pub if you have this attitude to the people you depend upon for your living? I just can't understand it...

Miss Walsh also said that she was aware of some villagers boycotting her bar, but said that it was mainly 'old people'.

She added: 'There are customers who are boycotting the pub, but it's the older people who are doing that.'

The mother-of-two said the pub was previously closed down because it was a 'dump' and only a small group of men had drunk there and said that since she took over in July it was more popular with youngsters and women.

She said that the people boycotting her needed to stop the campaign against her, adding: 'They need to stop bad mouthing me.'

They don't need to do anything. They don't need you.

You need them.

Need Incontinence Pads From The NHS?

Better contact your local newspaper instead (direct link n/a - go to p18):

A house-bound pensioner says he was left distressed when he had to wait days for urgent sanitary items, which are available in supermarkets, because his carer is not responsible for their supply.

Ah, of course. It's the good old NHS diversification yet again.

The elderly man contacted the 'Barking and Dagenham Post' after being given the runaround for three days by various health departments and 'Well, s'not MY job mate, innit?' care workers, when he was down to only two pads. So the enterprising reporters went to their local supermarket, bought a pack, and delivered it with the paper's compliments!

Good for them, and I don't say this often. Of course, they no doubt expressed their intentions to run it as a story.

And then the excuses started:

A council spokeman said the carer is only responsible for daily chores but can contact a district nurse from the community health service if any health-related issues arise.

And they said...

Joanne Stevens, from the community health service, said the supply of the pads was made through a seperate organisation that makes the order, although she would not disclose which one.

No, I bet...

She said the normal ordering process was followed and Mr King was due to be seen by a district nurse on Monday to ensure that everything was running as it should. On Friday afternoon, Mr King said he had received the delivery.

Well, Janet sweetie, everything is clearly not 'running as it should be' if an elderly man has to ring the local newspaper to get someone to put a bomb under the lazy, inefficient, couldn't-care-less boxtickers that we seem to be employing as 'care' assistants.

Is it?

Three Cheers for Bob Prothero!

Via 'Pavlov's Cat', this heartwarming story:

The giant Victor bomber - named Teasin' Tina - was only supposed to taxi down the runway and stop for a photoshoot before returning to the hangar.

But the bungling 'co-pilot' - an engineer with no flying experience - hit the throttle by mistake and the 75-tonne bomber lurched 150 feet into the air. Stunned pilot Bob Prothero, 70, grabbed the controls as the Victor bomber veered off the runway and climbed into the air on a collision course with the crowd and a nearby housing estate.

Quick-thinking Mr Prothero, who last flew a Victor in the 1980s and whose flying licence has long expired, took the controls and wrestled the gigantic plane to safety.

It landed in a field at the end of a runway without a single casualty or scratch to the aircraft.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is the Right Stuff.

The 'Daily Fail', by contrast, can't even wrestle a Google page to the ground in order to check their aviation facts...