Monday 23 November 2009

It's Not A Clown Car, Sweetie...

A mum-of-13 who costs taxpayers £50,000 a YEAR has said she won't stop having kids until she gives birth to twins.

Baby machine Sara Foss, 39, is due to give birth to her 14TH child in April but will try to get pregnant again as soon as possible to realise her dream.
And as if that wasn’t enough, check out the chavtastic names they chose for their brood…
Her mammoth brood now comprises Patrick, 23, Stephen, 13, Malachai, 12, Peppermint, 11, Echo, 10, Eli, nine, Rogue, eight, Frodo, seven, Morpheus, five, Artemis, four, Blackbird, three, Baudelaire, two, and nine-month-old Voorhees.
It seems Ms Foss (or her sperm donor) is a bit of a film fan.

You wonder when they found the time to watch them, don’t you?

13 comments:

Ross said...

" Patrick, 23, Stephen, 13, Malachai, 12, Peppermint, 11, Echo, 10, Eli, nine, Rogue, eight, Frodo, seven, Morpheus, five, Artemis, four, Blackbird, three, Baudelaire, two, and nine-month-old Voorhees. "

I like the way the names start out normal thent get progressively more ridiculous, as if she just lost interest in picking real names.

(Aren't the odds of twins 1/80), even at the rate she's going it seems a bit much to aim for.

Anonymous said...

Must be like shagging a bucket.

Oh c'mon! You were all thinking it.

sobers said...

This has to be a joke right? Peppermint? Echo?? Rogue??? Blackbird???? Frodo???????????

Thats child abuse right there. And I'm paying for this. There should be a limit on how many kids the State will pick up the tab for. Five tops. Any more than that you're either a militant Catholic or have some sort of mental disorder.

You want 14 kids, pay for them yourself.

Pavlov's Cat said...

Actually Henry my initial thought was that it would be like 'throwing a sausage up Oxford Street'

So Rogue is 8, hmmm, guess what Mum saw at the Cinema in 2000, closely followed by Frodo and Morpheus

Artemis - I can only assume someone dropped one of Eoin Colfer's books in front of her.

Blackbird - Beats me

Baudelaire is the surname of the children in the Lemony Snickett Books

Voorhees is the surname of Jason in Friday 13th Movies of which a new version was released in Feb this year.
Novemeber - Feb = 9 months Oh Snap

James Higham said...

That's great and she can do what she likes on her own funds. We'll stop funding her now though.

AntiCitizenOne said...

>There should be a limit on how many kids the State will pick up the tab for.

Yep, the best number is an integer less than one.

Mark Wadsworth said...

Re what HC says, why the big gap between Patrick and Stephen? What happened there?

Having pondered this, when I'm in charge, Child Benefit will be increased (and Child Tax Credits scrapped) but only paid for the first three children per mother. I disagree hotly with AC1 on this.

blueknight said...

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe,
'had too many children to know what to do,
I'm never one to grumble and grunt,
but I really think some should stitch up her - etc.

Henry Crun,
Yeah, we all were.

JuliaM said...

"I like the way the names start out normal thent get progressively more ridiculous..."

Considering the age gap as well, that may be a clue...

"Oh c'mon! You were all thinking it."

Indeed!

"This has to be a joke right?"

I wish! Those kids are in for a heck of a lot of teasing at school...

"Blackbird - Beats me "

The only thing that came to mind immediately was the airplane. Perhaps she went to an airshow in one of the few moments she was vertical?

JuliaM said...

"...she can do what she likes on her own funds. We'll stop funding her now though."

Ah, if only...

"Yep, the best number is an integer less than one."

Mmm, but as Mark points out, we do need some population growth. Otherwise, the siren call is to impoert from abroad, and we've seen where that leads.

"Having pondered this, when I'm in charge, Child Benefit will be increased (and Child Tax Credits scrapped) but only paid for the first three children per mother."

Splendid idea!

"There was an old woman who lived in a shoe,
'had too many children to know what to do,
I'm never one to grumble and grunt,
but I really think some should stitch up her - etc."


*chuckle*

Dave H said...

Rather OT for this post but in tune generally. Evidence of the kind of society we're breeding.

Just saw this in my local rag:

"It's extremely sad that out of a group of children this young, all between around nine and 13, I'd say, there was not one who saw the deed as wrong, or immoral, or who even had the decency to be ashamed of their actions."

Says it all. Sadly, she’s the species dying out. Even in a prosperous hub like Cambridge.

Weekend Yachtsman said...

I don't know why you classified this under "What the hell is wrong with people".

Clearly there's nothing much wrong with her, at least in physical terms, or in terms of responding rationally to the utterly perverse incentives provided by the Welfare State.

The question really should be "What the hell is wrong with us", in that we continue to fund this sort of thing in a completely open-ended way.

G Orwell said...

"The question really should be "What the hell is wrong with us", in that we continue to fund this sort of thing in a completely open-ended way."
Very true, is it because we or rather our masters are stupid?