Sunday, 30 September 2012

Quote Of The Month

September belongs to Man Widdecombe, for this splendid effort:
"*IF* you genuinely do work for the council (you look the type) as you claimed then can I just say that your inability to comprehend the difference between "dogs may only" and "only dogs may" will probably be the reason why you can't get a proper job in the private sector. I for one would not employ someone so clearly lacking basic comprehension skills."
Read the rest...


MTG said...

Man Widdecombe's experience is by no means unique. To ensure consistency in their manner and response to citizens, all public officials are cloned from a source of multi-hued mucous, scooped from a Huddersfield 'No Spitting' sign.

Peace at a park bench was interrupted by someone who told me she had seen me feeding the pigeons....and that she worked for the council. "Oh, no!" I responded. "A bird stole the crumbs falling from my sandwich before I could retrieve them."

This response appeared to stun the Warden before the eyes brightened again. "So you were littering then?" came the vain hope for ticket-worthy incrimination. "If there were only one scrap of evidence to support an audacious ticket, a smarter bird has already flown off with it."

Yup, cloned Wardens make for hours of fun.

manwiddicombe said...


David Gillies said...

These people have no arrest powers, no right to ask you your identity, indeed no authority beyond siccing the rozzers on you for daring to tell them to get stuffed, at which point they will either back down or escalate the situation to a point where you will get in the Daily Mail and make the council look like twats. If more people simply refused to knuckle under they would be stymied. It is not only satisfying but morally correct to tell officious little busybodies to wind their necks in.

JuliaM said...

"If more people simply refused to knuckle under they would be stymied."

Yes indeed!