Thursday 6 May 2010

What's Wrong With This Picture?

A judge today launched a savage attack on thuggery as he sentenced a thug for a late-night fight over a kebab.
Oh, wait. Clearly, that's not right.
A judge today launched a savage attack on 24-hour licensing laws as he sentenced a thug for a late-night fight over a kebab.
Ah. That's better...

11 comments:

Angry Exile said...

Lemme guess, the drink did it, right? It called to him from the boozer, took him out and jumped out of the bottle and got him shitfaced, and then egged him on.

Chuckles said...

Kebable homicide?

Sue said...

Another idiot Judge. We seem to have rather alot of them at the moment.

He looks like a tee-total puritan.

Oldrightie said...

Guess who appointed them all, Sue?

Mark Wadsworth said...

Phew! You had me worried there.

JohnRS said...

He doesnt realise it (they never do) but Judge Alzheimer is the problem.

Its not the availability of booze, pub opening hours, cut price promotions, happy hour, cheap super market loss leaders or any other fanciful piles of bull excrement he cares to conjure up.

Let's use a little logic here m'lud:

- A drinker chose to drink...he wasnt forced in any way.
- This volunteer drinker drank too much so he lost control of himself....his problem, if he can't handle it he shouldnt drink it. He's a big boy and can choose this for himself.
- Judge Al you have the power to jail the druken thug who committed the assault...but you didnt. So there's no real impact on the thug, no sanction, no reason why he shouldnt go out and do the same again next week.

So, Judge Al, the next time this idiot appears in front of you are you going to bottle it (pun intended) again?? Or are you actually going to do your job and lock the bastard up??

'cos if you're not, you should be fired.

RAB said...

Actually Sue alcoholism amongst the Judiciary is much higher than in the general population.
It has to do with the way our courts are organised.
A Crown Court judge is on circuit,and where he or she is sitting for the week is unlikely to be their home town, so they stay in Judges Lodgings, which are mansion type jobs reserved just for them.Well there isn't much to do in a strange town of an evening, so they tend to get pissed.
When I was clerking the court many years ago, I often used to sit with Sir Ian Lewis. He would be fine up till lunchtime, but lunch consisted of much brandy at the Bristol Club and in the afternoon he hadn't a clue what was going on.
He attended a Law Society dinner in Bristol once, and was so pissed that he fell asleep in his soup.
Two young lawyers were delegated to take him home. They were so scared of Lady Lewis that they turned off the engine of their car and freewheeled down the drive to his house, so as not to make a noise, then left him propped against the pillar, wrang the doorbell and ran like fuck!

What this arse is actually saying is that the upper educated classes can handle their booze, but you chavs cant, so we will take it away from you for your own good.

I'm suprised he didn't ask "What is a Kebab?" like the ones in the sixties who used to ask "What is a Beatle?"

Mind you, a lot of Judges are my age (50s) and there are an inordinate amount of them who are trendy lefties who think they can make the Law rather than justly administer it.

Brian, follower of Deornoth said...

Who is this perjuring cunt in a wig?

Next time I'm caught thumping people after chucking-out time I'll try to ensure he's the beak.

JuliaM said...

"Lemme guess, the drink did it, right?"

Indeed. We should ban it.

"He doesnt realise it (they never do) but Judge Alzheimer is the problem. "

Yup! At least (if you really have no choice in sentencing) lay blame where blame is due in the summing up.

What have they got to lose?

"They were so scared of Lady Lewis that they turned off the engine of their car and freewheeled down the drive to his house, so as not to make a noise, then left him propped against the pillar, wrang the doorbell and ran like fuck!"

Wonderful anecdote! :)

RAB said...

Thanks julia, I like doing anecdotes the best, and I've had an eventful life. I'll drop some more in for you as and when.
Here's one to be going on with though...
I went to the victory party at the black and White cafe, when all the defendants had been found not guilty in the Bristol Riot trial, back in the 80s. As did the trendy radical leftie lawyer who had got them off.
He should have been the hero of the hour shouldn't he? Nope. During the jollities he found that someone had nicked his wallet, so he had to borrow the train fare to get back to London from the prosecution barrister, who was also there.
We know how to show respect to trendy lefties down here in Bristol!

JuliaM said...

"We know how to show respect to trendy lefties down here in Bristol!"

Heh! Makes a change for someone to have their hand in his pocket...