Thursday 25 April 2019

It's About As Effective As The Real Thing...


The new bobby, named PC Morrie by staff, arrived yesterday and now stands guard in the window of the supermarket in St James’s Street, Brighton.
Helena Sherriff, duty manager at the shop, said: “I’ve been on holiday for a few days and he suddenly turned up this morning.
“He’ll be here for the foreseeable future, acting as a deterrent for antisocial behaviour and shoplifting.”
Probably is, too. Better than the real thing, even...

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Cheap shot Julia....the Huddersfield half-wit will be along in a minute to agree with you.
Jaded.

Lex Ferenda said...

The wheel just keeps on turning in the police.
We were doing this in the 1990s. We put life sized cardboard cut outs in some shops. Within a few days one had been kidnapped and was found decapitated. The rest lasted about a fortnight.
Waste of bloody time and money. But someone will have it on their CV as a great idea and huge success when they apply for promotion or change of job role.

MTG said...

We have a great team of Neighbourhood 'cardies', JuliaM. Local discontent is sharply focused on conduct of the likes of WC Jaded, who quickly bring the cutouts into disrepute.

Make It Stop said...

At a local branch of Lloyds chemist, they have a life sized cut out female officer (hands are down by her sides) in the window. This branch sell mobility aids. The staff have put a zimmer frame directly in front of the cut out.

Possibly a comment on police response times? They might be quicker if they used zimmer frames?


Feral said...

I bet he's no good at arresting. I expect he's not cut out for that sort of thing. (Cutout. Geddit?)

PJH said...

Elsewhen:

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/9573361/Crime-reducing-cardboard-policeman-is-stolen.html

https://www.newsandstar.co.uk/news/16743068.thieves-steal-cardboard-cutout-cumbria-police-officer/

MTG said...

@ Feral
I didn't understand your brilliant nugget immediately. However my hot coffee was a write-ff when the essence was finally assimilated. A professional scriptwriter, perchance?

Feral said...

MTG.
Thanks for the compliment. No,not a professional scriptwriter. Just a normal feral who has a weird sense of humour.
Take care.

Anonymous said...

Ah look, the two nutters are bonding. How sweet.
Jaded

Anonymous said...

Having seen too many of them in uniform, I never laugh at police jokes.

Feral said...

Sounds like someone is jealous.

MTG said...

Desk-bound corpulence did nothing for WC Jaded's mental well-being, Feral. As I seem to recall, the said moron of police blogs was addicted to smearing you on Inspector Gadget.

Feral said...

Ah yes. Inspector Gadget. Now that's a blog I miss. Although tis true that like yourself, anyone with an ounce of common sense is inevitably ganged up on by morons.

Anonymous said...

"An ounce of common sense?"-the delusional voices are strong in this one Luke.
Jaded

Anonymous said...

Let us enjoy a few tranquil hours. Those rapturous intervals, when both JuliaM and WC Jaded are all out of asperity, are far too rare.

JuliaM said...

"Cheap shot Julia....the Huddersfield half-wit will be along in a minute to agree with you."

Sometimes we agree. Sometimes we don't.

"The wheel just keeps on turning in the police. "

Oh, yes. See also: any big public sector organisation.

"This branch sell mobility aids. The staff have put a zimmer frame directly in front of the cut out."

Heh!

"I expect he's not cut out for that sort of thing. (Cutout. Geddit?)"

*groans*

"Elsewhen"

Just a matter of time!

Anonymous said...

"Sometimes we agree. Sometimes we don't."

The 'Filth' are a crock of shit and they know this themselves, JuliaM. Three 'educatid' plod may represent the majority of your contributors but don't become another dog too scared to leave the porch, dear.

Anonymous said...

"Sometimes we agree. Sometimes we don't."

When 'The Filth' became the most appropriate locution for this service, or 'crock of shit' in their own parlance, there was no longer a reason to act like a dog too scared to leave the porch, JuliaM.