Sunday 1 August 2010

New Health & Safety Scare

Shells. On a beach! Aiiieeeee!
Seven children have been injured by razor-sharp shells on Canvey seafront.

The coastguard is now advising beachgoers not to paddle in their bare feet, off Concord beach, near Eastern Esplanade.
Well, who could have predicted that!?
Rock oysters have increased rapidly in number along Canvey’s coastline in recent years and the shells are thought to cover rocks all the way from the Point to Thorney Bay.
Ban them! Ban rock oysters now! For the children!!
Mr Allwood added: “It’s about having an understanding of what’s below the surface of the water.

Below the high water mark there are all sorts of horrors.”
Indeed. Who knows what will surface on Canvey Island next?

3 comments:

Gibby Haynes said...

Razor-sharp my ass. If I tried to shave with a rock oyster shell, I'd seriously fuck my face up. (Even more so than what God decided it'd be funny to do.)
I guess the alleged higher number of rock oysters is due to ZOMGGlobul Warmingz!!1!LOL Just like everything else. Maybe I'll manage to squeeze out a bit of White Guilt when I'm burning my garden waste this afternoon.

Brian, follower of Deornoth said...

Don't get them started on Weaver Fish. Or Portuguese Men'o'War.

JuliaM said...

"I guess the alleged higher number of rock oysters is due to ZOMGGlobul Warmingz!!1!LOL Just like everything else."

I was surprised the 'Echo' didn't add that in!

"Don't get them started on Weaver Fish. Or Portuguese Men'o'War."

I wonder if the Canvey water is clean enough for them? ;)