Tuesday 26 July 2011

The Anti-Status Dog…

A dog walker who claims he and his pet were repeatedly “dive-bombed” by an aggressive seagull on Bournemouth beach is warning families and pet owners to be on their guard.
His pet being…what? A Chihuahua? A peke?

Well, no…
Jasen De-Botte, 37, and nine-month-old George, a Staffordshire American bull dog cross
/facepalm
The unemployed labourer from Northcote Road told the Daily Echo: “A fairly large seagull started swooping down on George; at first it was quite amusing because he thought it was a game.

“But, after about 20 minutes, the novelty wore off.

“Unfortunately the gull was determined to carry on and by the time we got to Boscombe Pier we must have had at least 50 close encounters.

“The bird got so close to my face I could feel the rush of wind from its wings as it swooped down. Luckily I was wearing a hat but I was worried the bird would peck out George’s eyes.”
You were worried a bird might hurt your dog? Good grief, what sort of seagulls do they have there?
Jasen added: “Eventually I managed to scare the bird off by throwing stones.

“None of us were injured but I am now worried that smaller dogs, or even children, could be the next victim of this very feisty bird. I’ve seen seagulls attacking people in Spain which was very frightening.”
A Spanish seagull, then?
...a concerned cyclist, who often takes her two children to the beach, said: “Some of the gulls around Bournemouth this year are the size of small dogs.
“They are bigger and noisier than usual. I think they have moved here from the West Country where they will snatch pasties out of your hand.”
Oh, OK, a Cornish seagull then!

Hand back your man card, Jasen.

16 comments:

SBC said...

"It was HORRIBLE, my little Children are traumatised FOR LIFE. This nasty big chav, who had a HUGE MENANCING VICIOUS DOG, picked up a piece of driftwood and batted the seagull out of the sky. But it didn't die straight away. It lay on the promenade screaming and crying real tears FOR HOURS! It was HEART RENDING! I am Soooo ANGRY. Sea gulls are beautiful and a delight. Why doesn't the RSPCA DO SOMETHING??!"

-tomorrow's lead story in the Daily Xenophobe.

My point being, what the hell was the bloke supposed to do?

[LOL the word 'captcha' for this post is 'tuffit'!]

PT said...

"Hand back your man card, Jasen."
A tennis bat might come in handy. New balls please!

Anonymous said...

What a muppet, who rings the paper to complain that the birds are bothering them? (other than Granpa Simpson that is)

Pavlov's Cat said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pavlov's Cat said...

I don't like birds close up, they give me the willies, they are too close to dinosaurs, empty dead eyes and in Herring Gulls a cut throat razor instead of a beak.

In Tokyo the crows would intimidate you ala Hitchcock when you went near the bins.

I also don't like Gannets (they wet their nests)

Captain Haddock said...

Whilst I have little or no time, nor sympathy for the "Stabby McChav" bulldog owning types ..

I have been "attacked" by Terns, whilst on the Farne Islands (they were defending their nest sites) .. honestly, its no laughing matter, I saw one chap with blood streaming down his face, where a Tern had lacerated his scalp ..

@ Pavlov's Cat ..

"I also don't like Gannets (they wet their nests)" ..

Interested in that one PC .. as birds can't actually urinate ..

Pavlov's Cat said...

@ Captain Haddock

May I direct your attention here Olsens book of Standard British Birds the relevant section starts around 2:20

ivan said...

Good job it wasn't my Newfoundland. The last bird that tried to dive bomb him ended up under his paw. The bird was after the baguette he had in his mouth - you don't try and take bread the shop keeper has given him unless you want a fight. The bird tried it and ended up being stood on.

wv = eugul - is someone trying to tell us something?

Greencoat said...

"..in the West Country where the gulls will snatch pasties out of your hand.”

They've probably saved a few lives there then.

Anonymous said...

We do have some huge buggers in this neck of the woods, and they certainly aren't afraid to get up close and personal. On the other hand the little one adores the idea of snagging one out of the air and actually managed to get a very brief grip on a wing once when she was about 18 months. I've never figured out what she intended to do with it once she had it, mind you.

DSD

Hitchcock said...

Oh if only I could afford a pastie in Boscombe.

Lerxst said...

I've also done the tern run on the Farnes and it's not that bad. Really.

Wear a study hat and you're fine. Though it does need to be thick-ish. Most of the pecks just feel like you're being prodded with a finger, but as I know from my first visit, if you're wearing something thin, sooner or later one will get through and draw blood.

More annoying these days is that they've started crapping on you when the pecks don't work - so make it a cheap hat!

Alternatively, if you haven't got a hat, you can do what one guy I saw did, and hoist a small child onto your shoulders.

David Gillies said...

It might look frightening, and I suppose you could get a nasty peck, but the only reason birds manage to stay up there is they weigh practically nothing. We had a very aggressive male swan on the pond at school which would attack all and sundry. Eventually one day a mate of mine got so pissed off at it that he punted it ten feet. He said it was like kicking a balloon. The bloody thing never tried it on again. Even a large seagull can't weigh more than a few pounds.

English Viking said...

George needs to hand back his dog-card, too.

What the feck use is a dog like that?

JuliaM said...

"My point being, what the hell was the bloke supposed to do? "

Laugh, move out of the bird's territory, and chalk it up to one of life's experiences?

"I don't like birds close up, they give me the willies, they are too close to dinosaurs.."

Every beach, it's own little Jurassic Park!

"...honestly, its no laughing matter, I saw one chap with blood streaming down his face, where a Tern had lacerated his scalp .."

Oh, I don't doubt it. On some islands, researchers wear hard hats!

"I've never figured out what she intended to do with it once she had it, mind you."

Heh! :)

JuliaM said...

"Alternatively, if you haven't got a hat, you can do what one guy I saw did, and hoist a small child onto your shoulders."

:D

"It might look frightening, and I suppose you could get a nasty peck, but the only reason birds manage to stay up there is they weigh practically nothing. "

Good point.

"George needs to hand back his dog-card, too."

Well, quite!