Tuesday 13 November 2012

And Yet, You Bleat About ‘Staffing Cuts’ And ‘The Thin Blue Line’..?

A road was closed yesterday as police were in a stand-off with a householder…
Who had a bomb? A gun? A pack of killer dogs? Sharks with frickin' laser beams on their head?
… who threw a television out of his window.
Oh. Right.

Well, yes, if one landed on your foot, it could be painful, certainly.

How many did he have to throw? Certainly, it seems, enough to keep a heck of a lot of police at bay.
Cordons were put in place at Birch Hall Avenue, Darwen, at the junction with Wyre Crescent after police were called to a domestic incident. A man was throwing items through the window, as his partner fled the address.
Police negotiators and officers wearing riot gear and shields were at the scene as the 28-year-old man was asked to come down from his first-floor flat.
Police were called at 2.30pm yesterday and several police vehicles and an ambulance were at the scene until after 5pm.
Good grief! The police are unrepentant, and in full ‘better safe than sorry!’ mode:
Chief Inspector Damian Kitchen said: “At around 2.30pm police were called to reports of a domestic incident at an address in Birch Hall Avenue in Darwen. Officers attended and were confronted with a man throwing items from the window of the first-floor flat and a cordon was put in place.
“Due to concerns for his welfare, police negotiators were sent to the scene in an attempt to bring the incident to a safe conclusion.
“Shortly after 5pm, specially trained officers entered the property and the man was detained without further incident. A 28-year-old man has been arrested on suspicion of criminal damage and affray.
We realise that this incident will have caused some disruption in the area and I would like to thank people for their patience.”
Ah, an irritating habit picked up from London Underground. You can really only thank people for ‘their patience’ when they have a choice.

But they don’t. You close the road, and they have to put up with it, regardless.


Anonymous said...

Overreaction from plod?
In another recent incident, a dozen plod in four patrol cars and a riot van, converged on Littledown leisure centre to arrest and handcuff a bather involved in a 'splashing' incident. The thickest of the plod thought it necessary to immediately jump into the pool in order to effect an arrest.

No shortage of either staff or stupidity, then. Indeed there were more resources available at the nick to determine he had committed no crime and drive him home.

A number of police chiefs subsequently tried to defend the action when they lied to the Press, stating that they had faced a “potentially high risk environment”. A reference to plod non-swimmers?

Anonymous said...


Surely the negotiator only had to say to the bloke chucking stuff out of the window, 'stop being a twat. We will come in there mob handed and arrest you, causing you pain and physical discomfort, or as we said earlier, stop being a twat.'

If that fails use the mob handed approach, maximum time expenditure half an hour.

ivan said...

Someone threw a TV out of the window, so what, he didn't throw his GF.

Does the UK now have uman rights for inanimate objects?

Tatty said...

Board up the windows and doors. Time taken....maybe half an hour ?

Barricade the bastard in and starve him out.

Let HIS welfare be HIS concern.

WPC Jilted said...

we ad too clows roads too the scrapyard t0oday an cuff a scarecrow four throwin scrap at us an ressisistin

Anonymous said...

What Bunny said, however the good chief inspector would be incapable of making such a simple decision as he is obviously a fully paid up member of the risk averse Health and safety obsessed modern police farce where every incident is an opportunity to put theoretical processes into practice and ticking several large boxes for the next promotion assessment.

that said, these days if the old bill do anything remotely old fashioned, uber cunts like MTG are lining up to bleat about police brutality and the rest of the usual bullshit.

MTG said...

@ Anon 15:26

Your crude language is an unnecessary plebeian credential when an umlaut omission can speak for itself, Penise.

selsey.steve said...

I was in a real Police Force for 28 years. We were all armed but almost never resorted to the use of firearms. We used common sense.
I faced a domestic stand-off like the one described in this post. We asked (politely) if we could come into the premises. After a mouthful of foul language in return we went straight in and put the offender down. He was not (very seriously) injured, and the whole incident was over inside 10 minutes.
No problem.
The offender was chucking stuff from the 32nd floor, no traffic blocks were needed, we sorted it out fast. That's what Police are supposed to do.

selsey.steve said...

My Police Force was the Royal Hong Kong Police, can anyone remember "The Hong Kong Beat" on TV? I was in it!

Anonymous said...

MTG - you really are a tiresome, poisonous cunt....fuck off and cut your grass.

microdave said...

TV's come under the WEEE regulations, so there was clearly a risk to public health, necessitating cordoning off the area until clean-up procedures had been implemented...

MTG said...

"I'm sheriff John Bunnell with the lopsided veneer leer; the fluorescent laminates and viewer discretion is advised....."

Most magistrates would probably accept that brief torment of this gravity, triggers an involuntary response or constitutes reasonable grounds, for jettisoning a TV from a building. Viewers should expect the unexpected and keep a brick handy, as preparation for accidental exposure to tasteless channels.

Anonymous said...

Televisions SHOULD be thrown out of first floor windows, providing no one is underneath. It's the only thing to do with them.


JuliaM said...

"A number of police chiefs subsequently tried to defend the action when they lied to the Press, stating that they had faced a “potentially high risk environment”."

It's the PR-heavy response that often makes these things more farcical. They are so terrified of bad publicity they are unable to simply say 'We made a mistake and we're sorry'.

"Barricade the bastard in and starve him out."

That takes time and effort and wastes the police officers who then have to stand by. Why not just go in and get him?

"That's what Police are supposed to do."

Spot on!

And I'm not sure I remember 'Hong Kong Beat'. But I DO remember 'Yellowthread Street' (early Eighties, ITV, I think?). I loved that show!

"Televisions SHOULD be thrown out of first floor windows, providing no one is underneath. It's the only thing to do with them."

Well, maybe when the latest 'reality' show is on.

DavefromTacoma said...


I thought maybe you were an American cop. Where I live the timeline would've been:

2:30 TV hits the street.

2:40 Idiot is handcuffed, in the back of a cop car, on his way to the county jail.

(And yes, if he didn't go peacefully, he would've got a few knocks upside the head to convince him to.)