Sunday, 17 November 2013

Cannot….Breathe!

The 41-year-old said: "I think it’s disgusting.
"I was shocked when I discovered it said Camel Balls – I thought it said Caramel Balls in the shop.
"I only went in to buy some chewing gum and noticed some kids’ 10p sweets so I thought I’d buy 10 for my two children.
"If I’d given it to them they could have taken them into school and then I am the mum who gave kids a sweet with a pair of balls on it."
Oh, make it stop, make it stop…! *gasps for breath*
The mum-of-two does not understand why they seem to be targeted at youngsters. She said: "They are children, why do they need to look at a camel with a big pair of balls?
"It says on the packet they are liquid-filled. I don’t want that kind of conversation with my kids.
"I can’t believe they were designed to be sold to children. I would not want that kind of conversation at school. I just can’t understand how they got to where they are. Don’t they have to be vetted?
"My husband thought it was hilarious and there is a funny side but I still think it’s wrong."
*turns blue*
Mrs Phillips thinks the confectionery should be pulled out of shops. She said: "I think they should be taken away from shops.
"I told Bexley Council and they said they don’t have the resources to cover it any longer."
"People might just say it’s a bit of fun but I just don’t get it."
Pity poor Mr Phillips, then…
The UK managing director of Fini Sweets U.K. Ltd, Paul Southam, said: "I am sorry your reader has failed to see the somewhat humorous side of this product, however I do fully understand the need for freedom of speech when a parents feels protective against her young ones.
"Pre-launch I was somewhat hesitant whether or not to launch into the UK, however, I was assured that the product is exported to over 80 countries without any problem." He added:
"We had three letters of complaint, which are all fully understandable, however, the parents of these children did see the funny side to a degree.
"Novelty products such as these have a very short ‘life date’, in so much as they disappear as fast as they come, however, Camels Balls keeps going from strength to strength for some untold reason."
Three..!? There’s three more like Mrs Phillips?!?

16 comments:

SteveA said...

Here's one of the other miserable sods
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/bubblegum-called-camel-balls-sold-1797240

SteveA said...

Here's one of the three

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/bubblegum-called-camel-balls-sold-1797240

Woman on a Raft said...

The reason she would be in trouble with the school is that it is clearly labelled 'bubble gum'. If there is a substance designed to cause caretakers and head teachers lose their temper, it is gum.

James said...

I was so touched by this story that I made my own video tribute:

http://youtu.be/diu8D8JuDew

Pavlov's Cat said...


I think the Newshopper really missed a trick here to get into APILN , as soon as I saw the headline, I scrambled for the photo op, but it was not to be

Anonymous said...

Judging by that picture, I think she should thank her luck stars that they were not 'chocolate coated'.

Fidel Cuntstruck said...

I wonder if Mrs Phillips went to the papers because the Council genuinely didn't have resources free to deal with the matter, or went to the papers because the person at the Council who took her call couldn't breathe either :0)

There is an old saying, hugely appropriate to the Mrs Phillips of the world, that to keep quiet and be thought a fool is far better than opening one's mouth and proving it beyond all doubt

What was that famous phrase from 'Allo 'allo ?

Anonymous said...

@ Pavlov's Cat - me too, i scrolled down hoping to find a picture of the miserable loon and some fat kid pretending to look upset - but like you I was so disappointed. ANother story I think from the same source a few months ago was the angry woman who found her local pound store selling vibrators - a pic would have been amazing

Anonymous said...

I think I've lost the will to live.
John Gibson

Macheath said...

With apologies to Stan Ridgeway:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFYxCIr-Byo

“I was out shopping for my children last week in Sidcup town”
Said this disgusted mum from Harman Drive
“I popped into the shop to buy some gum and saw them there
And I feel that I’ve been taken for a ride.”
The managing director says it’s all a bit of fun
But Mrs Phillips is not easy to placate
"My husband thought it was hilarious and there is a funny side
But I just don’t get it, I’m afraid.

I went to Bexley Council but they didn’t want to hear,
I don’t see why the things should be sold at all:
I said, ‘My kids are children; tell me, why do they need to look
At a camel with a great big pair of balls?’”

Woah-oh-oh-oh, Camel Balls
Things are never quite the way they seem
Oh no! No, no Camel Balls!
Mrs Phillips wants to keep it clean.

John M said...

Perhaps we need to ban Harry Potter as well since, since it describes vomit drops and snot sweets.

Or perhaps it would just be easier to shoot people who are clearly retarded,

Ian Hills said...

What. a. silly. bitch.

James Higham said...

Reminds me of Python's Spring Surprise - steel bolts spring out and plunge through both cheeks.

Greencoat said...

Caramel Balls is a lovely girl.

JuliaM said...

"Here's one of the other miserable sods"

That '15 minutes of fame' business has a lot to answer for...

" If there is a substance designed to cause caretakers and head teachers lose their temper, it is gum."

I loathe the stuff - Singapore has the right idea!

"I was so touched by this story that I made my own video tribute:"

:D

"I think the Newshopper really missed a trick here to get into APILN.."

Oh, it's perfect, isn't it?

JuliaM said...

"...or went to the papers because the person at the Council who took her call couldn't breathe either :0)"

Heh!

"With apologies to Stan Ridgeway"

/applause

"Caramel Balls is a lovely girl."

It'll be a chavname before you know it!