Sunday, 10 April 2011

Move Over, Dr Tony Hill And Aaron Hotchner...

...there's a new criminal profiler in town:
Last night, a senior MP said the disclosures raised serious questions about why Donovan – who was about to take over guard duty on Astute when the shooting happened – had been allowed to go to sea in the first place.
What did they find? A shrine made from the bones of his victims? A murder diary? One of those creepy walls covered in photos of his intended prey, and drawings done in bodily fluids?
Liberal Democrat MP and defence expert Mike Hancock said he planned to quiz Defence Ministers in Parliament about how Donovan was vetted and allowed to join the crew of the £1.2 billion nuclear attack submarine.

‘I am surprised that this man was on a nuclear submarine,’ he said.

‘I would have thought there was tight scrutiny for our submariners, so how on earth he passed I don’t know.

‘I will be questioning what’s going on. I feel very unsure about somebody who has an element of eccentricity about himself – by calling himself Reggie Moondogg, putting it on Facebook – joining the Navy, getting recruited to serve on a nuclear submarine and then being given a weapon to guard it.

‘So there must be some questions about his suitability. I can’t understand how the vetting programme has let this happen.’
Christ, where to start?

So, this buffoon thinks that changing your name, writing bad rap 'poetry' on Facebook and being a bit eccentric is a sure-fire, unmissable clue that you will one day go on a murder spree?

I'd have thought no-one who wasn't a bit eccentric would want to serve on a tin-can at the bottom of the ocean in the first place!

Just wait until he finds out how many of them Twitter. Under assumed names. Aiiieeee! They'll kill us all in our beds!

Speaking of which, I do like his (and the 'Mail's') constant repetition of the words 'nuclear submarine', though. All the better to implant thoughts of 'The Hunt for Red October' and 'Crimson Tide' in the public consciousness. Ignoring the fact that the suspect was just an able seaman, and if they are handing out the launch codes to those lowly ranks, they have a few more problems than someone going tonto with a gun...
One senior naval commander said: ‘It’s beyond belief that this could have happened on a submarine. They are such close-knit communities and it’s like one big family, because the men spend so much time together at close quarters for long periods.

‘We simply do not know what caused this tragedy, but the police and Navy inquiries will find out.’
We don't need them. We have Lib Dem MPs! Just get Mike Hancock on the vetting panel, he can spot a wrong 'un a mile off...

18 comments:

MTG said...

That it failed to spot such raw talent ahead of the Navy, is an indication of a new laxity in UK police recruitment.

Ross said...

You'd have thought Mike Hancock of all people would keep quiet about recruiting people who are potentially suspect into sensitive positions.

Anonymous said...

MTG, how is this a police story? You are a tedious twat.
Jaded

Longrider said...

If eccentricity was a crime, I'd have been put away for life decades ago.

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX Ignoring the fact that the suspect was just an able seaman, and if they are handing out the launch codes to those lowly ranks, XX

Some people also seem to have problems distinguishing neuclear powered and nuclear weaponed.

Although Astute carries Tomakhawks which can be neuclear armed, the British ones are all conventionaly warheaded.

PT Barnum said...

I've met two submariners in my life and eccentricity seems to be a job requirement for such men as neither of them was quite 'right' (although this may be effect rather than cause). I believe it's still the case that they are the only part of the Navy permitted to have beards - something to do during all those long hours under the sea?

wv - catfari (a landrover-borne shoot at dusk through suburbia)

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX I believe it's still the case that they are the only part of the Navy permitted to have beards Xx

Na. I have seen all branches with beards. You need Captains permission. But it is not....WAS not a "Branch" thing. Although I have heard that now Tatoos which are visible in short shirt sleeve order (Number 8s) are banned.

Disenfranchised of Buckingham said...

MTG that was funny.

I agree with Furor this was a nuclear power sub, not nuclear armed but don't expect the media to care about the difference.

Kevin B said...

"It’s beyond belief that this could have happened on a submarine. They are such close-knit communities and it’s like one big family"

Yeah, 'cos families are known for never getting violent among themselves. Just ask that guy Cain and his brother Abel.

Anonymous said...

@ Jaded

"You are a tedious twat."

£10 says that your smooth talk seduced more than one butch-lesbian truck driver.

Captain Haddock said...

That'll be this Mike Hancock then, will it ?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1336173/Lib-Dem-MP-Mike-Hancock-obsessed-Russian-women.html

As for growing facial whiskers in the Royal Navy .. all Ranks & Ratings, of any Branch are required to submit a Request Form (known as putting, or slapping your Chit in) to "Discontinue shaving" .. the "grower" then has Fourteen days in which to grow a "Full Set" ie Beard & Moustache, which, at the end of 14 days must be "of neat, overall and uniform appearance" .. If the growth fails to make the grade, the "grower" is then ordered to "Shave Off" ..

If the "grower" subsequently decides he wishes to "lose" his "Set" .. he must request permission to "Continue Shaving" ..

"Goatees", Beards without Moustaches or other variations are not permitted ..

Likewise Men of the Royal Navy are not permitted to wear Moustaches alone ..

The wearing of moustaches is confined to Officers & Men of the Royal Marines, who are not normally permitted to grow full beards (there are sometimes however, Medical exceptions made)


On rare occasions the normal "rules" can be suspended .. for example on long deployments, when Ships & their companies are not likely to come into contact with the general public ..

One such was the "Beira Patrol" carried out continuously between 1970 & 1974 .. when Inter-Mess, Inter-Branch & even Inter-Ship beard growing competitions (amongst others) were held ..

Anonymous said...

Of course Astute is a nice new boat not like the ones in my day. Salvador Dali told the tale of two sardines looking at a submarine and commenting "There goes our revenge. Humans crammed tightly together and covered in oil". Still listening to Al-BBC pontificating about why our armed forces are allowed to have access to guns was quite amusing! They are called the "Armed Forces" for a reason!

Longrider said...

Still listening to Al-BBC pontificating about why our armed forces are allowed to have access to guns was quite amusing!

I recall our gunnery instructor starting our training with the comment "Matelots with guns scares the shit out of me!"

Maybe he had a point.

Captain Haddock said...

Anon @ 1925 ..

I'm guessing that you're a veteran of the "O" or "P" Class Boats ?

The Beeb couldn't find its own arse with both hands & a map ..

The events on "Astute" are tragic for the RN in general & the Submarine Service in particular ..

My personal thoughts (as a former Bootneck) are with the families of all concerned ..

JuliaM said...

"You'd have thought Mike Hancock of all people would keep quiet about recruiting people who are potentially suspect into sensitive positions."

The name didn't immediately ring a bell, but thanks to Capt Haddock's link, yes, you would indeed!

"Some people also seem to have problems distinguishing neuclear powered and nuclear weaponed."

It doesn't matter to the MSM, so long as they get that scary word out there!

"Salvador Dali told the tale of two sardines looking at a submarine and commenting "There goes our revenge. Humans crammed tightly together and covered in oil"."

:D

SimonF said...

£1.2 billion nuclear attack submarine.

As opposed to what? A nuclear peace-nik submarine? A nuclear target practice submarine?

Surreptitious Evil said...

@SimonF

"Attack" as opposed to "missile".

SSGN rather than SSBN.

WV is "torys" :)

The King of Wrong said...

Astute is an SSN, i.e. nuclear-powered SSK (hunter-killer/"fast attack") sub. They're the subs that sink ships and destroy other subs.

Not of course to be confused with the Vanguard-class SSBNs ("boomers"), carrying Trident nuclear ICBMs as well as being nuclear-powered.

The UK doesn't really have any SSGNs, though all of our boats can be equipped with Tomahawks launched from torpedo tubes to provide a land-attack capability. The term applies really more to the retrofitted US Ohio-class (mostly SSBN) with vertical launch tubes.