Saturday 29 March 2014

Major Crime In Eltham!

But don’t worry, police are on the case!
It is believed that a flowerpot containing flowers was broken and that (the object) was spat at.
Wow! A broken flowerpot! And someone spitting in the street!
The men, aged 18 and 19, were taken into custody and have been bailed until May 29.
Wha…?

Seriously? You can be arrested for this? If only I’d known, I’d have happily dialled 999 when I saw the chap in front of me in the Tube yesterday morning spit on the carriage floor!

But then, I suspect I’d just be accused of wasting police time. It matters, you see, where you do it…

9 comments:

Trevor said...

Quite right too. After all, if there's any justice it will be the site of Charles' coronation...

Is there a number I can ring to report my country is being pissed all over?

Anonymous said...

Yet when 2 pikeys were found removing a brass plaque from a local war memorial at 3am (for cleaning, they said) and urinating on the monument, they only received a caution (in whichever name they were using at the time). On the other hand, if they were bailed, they would have just disappeared into the pikey netherworld.
Penseivat

Anonymous said...

Spitters should be mercilessly shot on sight.

The fact that most of them are foreign is a bonus.

MTG said...

Just when you thought this year's Straw Prize for Police Hypocrisy could be heading North, the Met play an ace.

Anonymous said...

Took your time Julia......

Jaded

Anonymous said...

Julia I agree with the point you make, where this paving stone is concerned it really does matter.

I'm sure when St Baroness Doreen takes a break from those M&S ads she will want the offenders publicly flogged.

That said, surely EVERYONE including all the slag, all the idiots in Eltham surely know that if they even look askance at this sacred spot they run the risk of all those scarce police resources descending upon them like the proverbial ton of bricks.

Someone more up to date may be able to correct me BUT I think that everyone who has been arrested for a Lawrence heresy at his shrine has been pissed at the time - like these two numbnuts must have been.

andy5759 said...

Hush now, we don't want the alcohol bansturbators picking up on that.

ivan said...

There is only one answer - that site needs to be nuked from orbit. That way it will stop all the stupidity.

JuliaM said...

"Is there a number I can ring to report my country is being pissed all over?"

/applause

"Spitters should be mercilessly shot on sight."

*nods enthusiastically*

"I'm sure when St Baroness Doreen takes a break from those M&S ads..."

Or from plotting the ruination of the justice system with Kier Starmer or accusing the police of a 'racial killing' over Duggan on publicly funded radio...