Tuesday 16 August 2011

Keeping Death Off The Roads…

…yeah, we’re definitely doin’ it wrong:
A driver caught using two mobile phones and apparently steering with his knees was banned from driving for 12 months yesterday.
Did the judge think to ask why he’d need two mobile phones? It can’t have been that one was a business phone, after all, because he’s unemployed…
The previous hearing was told that police who pulled him over had to wait for him to finish his phone conversation before he would speak to them.
‘Had to’..?
Secker was last month found guilty in his absence of driving with no insurance, using a mobile phone while driving and not being in proper control of a vehicle.
‘In his absence’….

So, couldn’t be bothered to turn up?
Magistrates said they would have fined him £500 for the offences, but reduced the fine to £150 after hearing that he was on benefits.
*grinds teeth*

16 comments:

Woman on a Raft said...

We must hope it was his knees he was driving with.

SBC said...

Norfolk, where indicators are optional extras...

Seriously, nowhere is the standing of driving so bad as here in deepest darkest Norfuck. Even visiting Italians pull over shaking.

The police have let my youngest off no end of tickets simply because he WAS insured. No, I'm not joking.

Anonymous said...

IMO it's merely recognition that benefit claimants don't pay fines - and by reducing it, the fine will probably be written off as irrecoverable earlier.

Edwin Greenwood said...

I've never understood this two mobile phones malarkey. Even when they're not driving their uninsured, untaxed motors with their knees, or some other convenient part of their anatomy, the underclass are everywhere to be seen intently comparing the screen displays of their two, occasionally three, mobiles.

What are they up to?

wiggiatlarge said...

SBC has hit the nail on the head,having recently moved to the area i can confirm after years of driving in London this has to be seen to be believed .
The school run mums in their people carriers ,fully loaded with offspring going far to fast on the wrong side of the road in narrow country lanes with the mobile clamped to the ear is a daily nightmare,the yobs who travel on the same roads ditto in their vehicle of choice usually a first issue Peugeot 206 or similiar (preferably matt blue)with the stupid huge exhaust and baseball cap,an Australian friend of mine gave me an Aussie phrase some time ago "beware the hat" the reasoning being why would anyone get into a car and put a hat on ,that by definition making those drivers who did, something to avoid,yes Norfolk has all of this and more when it comes to driving.

SBC said...

"first issue Peugeot 206 or similiar (preferably matt blue)with the stupid huge exhaust and baseball cap,an "

My youngest has a white one...just so you're pre-warned....but at least he's insured.

The Grim Reaper said...

"Keeping death off the roads" reads the title of this thread.

In fairness, even I have to get around somehow...

SBC said...

"We must hope it was his knees he was driving with."

Years ago our Autobahn Polizei pulled over a trucker who was wanking and reading a porno mag at the wheel of his Volvo-Fwhatever.

His excuse?

Helped him stay awake.

MTG said...

Fined £150 and unlikely to pay any of it?

Average UK car insurance premiums exceed £800 and this chap's £650+ profit is a particularly painful lesson to honest folk.

Kneeze Up said...

""We must hope it was his knees he was driving with.""

I once knew someone who worked in an insurance claims department. The odd thing he said was the number of claims where women passengers had windscreen glass in their knees.

Personally, I can't work out why...

Anonymous said...

"beware the hat"

Would this include muzzie women with their own distinctive hoods up?

Captain Haddock said...

Why did he need two mobile phones ?

Perhaps he was talking to himself .. after all, you're never alone with Schizophrenia ..

microdave said...

"What are they up to?"

They almost certainly have two (or more) women on the go, and have different phones for each of them...

Captain Haddock said...

@ MD ...

"They almost certainly have two (or more) women on the go, and have different phones for each of them" ...

Ahhh .. so not schizophrenic then .. merely masochistic .. ;)

blueknight said...

We must hope it was his knees he was driving with.

Highway Code rule 112, use of horn...

JuliaM said...

"We must hope it was his knees he was driving with."

LOL!

"Seriously, nowhere is the standing of driving so bad as here in deepest darkest Norfuck. Even visiting Italians pull over shaking."

That IS bad!

"What are they up to?"

I think microdave has the answer...