Monday 3 October 2011

Is There A More Depressing Phrase In Modern-Day Britain…

..than ‘trendy teaching methods’?
Schoolchildren have been banned from putting their hands up in class - and told to do a 'Fonz' thumbs up instead…Helpful posters at the school show a raised arm with a thick red cross next to it and a picture of a child doing a thumbs up.
/facepalm
Dad-of-three Dave Campleman, 44, who has two children at the Bridlington school, said: 'I thought it was a joke at first. It's daft. I can't see the logic in it.

'Fair enough if it was across the board, but I've not heard of any other schools doing it.'
Well, frankly, I can’t see how it would somehow be ‘fair’ if all the other schools are doing it. It’s nonsense on stilts!
Headteacher Cheryle Adams insisted that the more positive hand signal had a 'calming' effect on the eight- and nine-year-old children.
Really? You mean, that’s not all in your head? You could demonstrate that, could you?
The school has previously tried out other 'progressive' teaching methods, including a lucky-dip lollipop-stick system to choose pupils to answer questions.
Ahhh, right. This is all about being ‘fair’ and ensuring that there’s no-one in the class who stands out, no-one who knows all the answers, and so is liable to make the thick kids feel bad, I guess.

Can’t have that. All must have prizes!

20 comments:

Discipline is so outdated said...

Let us take this to the logical conclusion.

A lucky dip lolly-stick system could be applied to the answering process. A 'teacher' (for there is bugger all teaching being done) selects a pupil's lolly stick and then lolly-sticks the response needed.

"Ahmed, if you know the answer to why water runs downhill put your left leg in the air."

Followed by "if you don't know, receive a gold star for being able to lift your left knee and wave it all about."

Conniesdad said...

I assume they do not teach Iranian or Sardinian kids, as in both those places the sign is he same as a raised middle finger in the UK

Pavlov's Cat said...

No Len Fairclough jokes please

Macheath said...

You're spot on with the rationale - it was more explicit in my chalkface days; you didn't ask for a show of hands because it would make those who didn't know the answer feel inadequate.

The trouble is that these 'lolly-stick' and 'thumbs-up' methods are just the sort of thing that educational theorists get excited about and hold up as examples of good practice, perpetuating the belief that a new gimmick is always better than a traditional system.

Incidentally, the common problem of the over-keen bouncing up and down breathlessly - Miss, Miss, I know, Miss! - used to be easily dealt with by a few sarcastic comments - not, I suspect, a method available to today's teachers.

Anonymous said...

Of course the hands vs. thumbs signalling is stupid but mainly because it makes no real difference.

I'm not sure it's useful to think of these average classroom situations as a competition - as opposed to actual tests, which obviously are.
We have to ask ourselves what is the point of asking the class for answers, as opposed to just giving them the answers, in the first place.

Surely it's more to do with involving everyone, making them think, encouraging them to pay attention etc, not to see who is the pushiest.

A bright attentive kid may not put their hand up because they are uncomfortable being the centre of attention or because they are less confident that they have the right answer even when they do. The pushier kids may put their hands up even when they are wrong.

Regularly asking the kids who don't volunteer is likely to buck up the ideas of the whole class as they will know that they can't just coast through a lesson thinking that they can get away with not paying attention as long as they don't stick their hands up.
It might also boost the confidence of the kids who know the answers but normally don't speak up in class.

Lynne said...

If the teachers want a raised digit then let it be of the impudicus variety. Or there's the traditional buy one get one free (BOGOF) sign...

James Higham said...

Double facepalm and rocking back and forth on the chair in mental anguish.

WitteringsfromWitney said...

Did you miss this other addition to the teaching agenda, one in which they learn new skulls?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2044403/Primary-school-pupils-young-taught-head-massages-calm.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

Captain Haddock said...

"Is There A More Depressing Phrase In Modern-Day Britain…"

There is indeed Julia ..

It goes "I don't want Britain to leave the EU" ...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2044316/David-Cameron-NOT-support-UK-referendum-EU-membership.html

blueknight said...

... thumbs up who broke the window doesn't sound right

Ed P said...

Headteacher Cheryle?
What's with the illeterate speling of your own name?
And what's wrong with the title Headmistress anyway? It's just more PC lunacy (as if there isn't too much already).

Macheath said...

Ed P; there's worse out there...

Harriet Sergeant (The Times) on teachers:

'“I am not a teacher. I am a facilitator,” said one teacher primly. The head of another school insisted she was a “head learner” rather than a headmistress.'

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/comment/columnists/guest_contributors/article7034975.ece

Lynne said...

...head of another school insisted she was a “head learner”...

I think she meant headcase.

Captain Haddock said...

"The head of another school insisted she was a “head learner” rather than a headmistress" ...

Surely, the pupils are the learners .. they are there to learn, are they not ? ..

I can't, offhand, think of a better way of illustrating just how low the standards of Teachers have dropped .. than to call oneself a "head learner" ..

I'm glad that my kids are well beyond their clutches .. and for the first time, grateful that I don't yet have grandchildren ..

Leg-iron said...

The logic is simple. It trains them to do what they're told, even if what they're told to do seems stupid and/or irrelevant. It's obedience training. Learning to follow orders.

Preparing them for their future roles believing all the crap the government and fake charities will throw at them. Without question.

I tried to touch on this subject once before but got sidetracked into talk of travellers and land laws. Still trying to come up with a way of putting it that won't get sidetracked.

Anonymous said...

Off topic..
Could someone please teach the numpty at Orphans of Liberty how to post properly?Its been timing out all night.

Woodsy42 said...

A more depressing phrase? A few sadly. Captain H has one good suggestion. I would add 'research suggests that', or any equivalent.

JuliaM said...

"I assume they do not teach Iranian or Sardinian kids, as in both those places the sign is he same as a raised middle finger in the UK"

Ooooh!

"No Len Fairclough jokes please"

;)

"You're spot on with the rationale - it was more explicit in my chalkface days..."

The later paragraph about the school's fondness for progressive teaching methods was the five-alarm giveaway.

"Regularly asking the kids who don't volunteer is likely to buck up the ideas of the whole class as they will know that they can't just coast through a lesson..."

Ah, but that would entail the teachers actually teaching, rather than, as MacHeath notes, being 'facilitators'...

JuliaM said...

"If the teachers want a raised digit then let it be of the impudicus variety."

Heh!

"Did you miss this other addition to the teaching agenda, one in which they learn new skulls?"

*joins James in the corner, weeping*

"Could someone please teach the numpty at Orphans of Liberty how to post properly?Its been timing out all night."

We've been knocked out by the BT Broadband debacle. We'll be back up soon.

"The logic is simple. It trains them to do what they're told, even if what they're told to do seems stupid and/or irrelevant. It's obedience training. Learning to follow orders."

Ah, good point!

SadButMadLad said...

Conniesdad, very true.