"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

That word being 'vulnerable':

Douglas's lawyer Nichola Poe admitted her client was “no stranger to the courts” but said he did not deserve prison as he was a “vulnerable” man with mental health issues.

She said: “Mr Douglas had an unhappy childhood and an uncaring one. That's further caused him problems when he was diagnosed with dyslexia at 15. There was very little support for that. He had a number of jobs and was in full-time work until he became a heroin addict. That was an addiction that took over his life. The last two years he's come off the methadone project and he's now completely drug-free.

“When you have a class A addiction it doesn't go away. He suffers from depression and anxiety and is on medication. There's been mental health intervention with Mr Douglas and he recently had a psychiatric assessment. You have a man in court who is quite vulnerable.”

Boy, if this man had a dog, it'd probably only have three legs. And be called 'Lucky'...

What had he done to find himself in court (this time).

Ah, well:

Harlow Magistrates Court heard that Douglas has been at his mother's house in Parvills, Waltham Abbey, when he saw Mr Redgwell reversing his car out from the drive of his nearby house.

He stuck up two fingers to Mr Redgwell, who he had already been found guilty of harassing at an earlier trial, causing the neighbour to get out of his car and ask him what he was doing.

Douglas then kicked Mr Redgwell in the middle of his face, grabbed him by the throat, and placed him in a headlock, repeatedly punching him while the victim's ten-year-old daughter looked on from the back seat of the car.

Which rather begs the question, if Douglas is 'vulnerable', what the hell do we call Mr Redgwell?

You are, of course, now thinking 'Well, at least the magistrates won't fall for this pointless flannel', aren't you?

Heh!

Magistrates chair Russell Pearson said the offence was so severe as to merit a custodial sentence but it would be suspended.

He said: “You seem committed to leading a drug-free life and we hope this continues. We feel that given the nature of your mental health issues a Think First course might prove effective.”

Douglas was handed a 24-week prison sentence suspended for 18 months, a supervision order for 18 months and ordered to complete the Think First program.

He was also given an exclusion order banning him from visiting Parvills for six months, and ordered to pay £455 in costs to the court and £300 in compensation to Mr Redgwell. The money will be taken from his benefits.

Yes, indeed.

He won't be paying Mr Redgwell compensation. WE will.

Because he doesn't have any money, other than that the State gives him. Because he's an unemployed former drug abuser with impulse control issues and a criminal record. So, he's unlikely to ever be in gainful employment, and you and I will be paying for him for the rest of his life.

But it's ok. He's 'vulnerable'...