Saturday, 31 March 2012

Tip: If You Want To Maim Someone And Get Off Lightly…

…use a car. Not a baseball bat:
A woman has had to learn how to walk again after an aggressive drink-driver ploughed into the car she was in, a court heard.

The woman was with her two sisters, travelling along Cymbeline Way, Colchester, when Enoch Aykeampong’s van crashed into them.

He was jailed for four months after admitting drink-driving at Colchester Magistrates’ Court.
Yup. Four months. He won’t serve it, we all know that.
Ms Hall said: “Three sisters had to be cut out by the fire brigade.

Police attended and the defendant was clearly intoxicated. He became a aggressive when arrested.”
Hopefully, he got a face full of CS gas at least. I wonder what possible sort of mitigation will be…

Ah. Right. None, really:
Louise Reader, mitigating, said the sisters had since been compensated by an insurance company.
How in the hell is that ‘mitigation’? Do you need a dictionary, love?


Estuary Rock said...

Enoch Aykeampong

You do get some funny names in Essex, don't you?

I thought the only pong came from Southend mud flats.

Anonymous said...

As we say in the police force: if you want to kill someone, use a car and say it was an accident.

Brian, follower of Deornoth said...

@Estuary Rock, I guess it must be one of the Middlesex Aykeampongs.

JuliaM said...

"You do get some funny names in Essex, don't you?"

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