Judge Anthony Goldstaub QC sentenced Stuart Wood for seven years for the attack, then told him: 'You have turned to Islam and this promises well for your future, particularly as you are now an adherent of a religion which respects women and self-discipline.'I don't think any further comment is required...
But boy, didn't April 1st come round quickly!
It is a joke. Isn't it? I mean, it must be. Mustn't it?
Update: Thanks to 'Woman on a Raft' in the comments, we can see this judge has some odd ideas when it comes to sentencing.
Brown's counsel, Clare Ashcroft, told the court that the "toxic" relationship between Brown and his victim the mother of one child by him and five with other dads meant they were "not able to live in close quarters with each other".So, what does he use for assault on his girlfriend next time? A driver? A nine-iron?
But Miss Ashcroft continued: "He has now stopped drinking to excess and is interested in working out in the gym and playing golf."