Monday 7 November 2011

(Dog) Blanket Coverage…

It has been open to dog walkers for more than a century.

Now, canine owners taking a stroll in East Park are being given a code of conduct on how to walk their dogs.
Because, of course, this is easier than identifying and acting to resolve the problems caused by the sorts of dog walkers who wouldn’t know what a code of conduct was if it was rolled up and used to whack them on the nose…
Drawn up by East Park Dog Walkers' Association and Hull City Council dog wardens, the code tells owners where dogs are not allowed to go in the park and offers advice on letting dogs off their leads.

It also tackles the much- debated issue of dog fouling.
And while they were beavering away with MS Publisher, and having endless meetings (with coffee and biscuits, of course) trying to decide what would go in their little pamphlet, who was patrolling the park?
Dog warden supervisor Helen Foulston said: "The code is about raising awareness of responsible dog ownership.

"The main issues we come across here are dog fouling, dog-on-dog attacks and wildfowl being chased."
And the sort of owners who let their animals do such things will treat your pointless little publication with contempt.

Because unlike their dogs, you have no teeth...

6 comments:

Captain Haddock said...

Ahhh, Hull again .. the shithole which keeps on giving ..

Dog warden supervisor Helen Foulston "The main issues we come across here are dog fouling .. "

You really couldn't make it up ... ;)

Twenty_Rothmans said...

Now, anus owners taking a dump in East Park are being given a code of conduct on how to wipe their bums.

Drawn up by East Park Anus Owners' Association and Hull City Council Barking Spider wardens, the code tells owners where logs are not allowed in the park and offers advice on doing the paperwork.

It also tackles the much- debated issue of winnits.

Copper Bolt warden supervisor Helen Foulston said: "The code is about raising awareness of responsible date ownership.

"The main issues we come across here are dangleberries, ringsting and skidmarks."


I was tempted to do something for c0ck owners, you know, never flashing it at schoolgirls or not forcing it on someone.

If we wait long enough, someone will do it.

Angry Exile said...

Because unlike their dogs, you have no teeth...

Oooh, miaow, Julia. ;-)

Dogs and bitches said...

Pointleess activity: the dogs cannot read and neither will their chav owners.

Unless it has a page 3 girl with her fangs bared.

Woman on a Raft said...

Of course dogs can read, but not all of them. Have you not seen the signs saying "Guide dogs only".

We know the owners aren't reading those, so it must the Guide dogs.

JuliaM said...

"If we wait long enough, someone will do it."

And as Capt Haddock points out, it'll probably be in Hull!

"We know the owners aren't reading those, so it must the Guide dogs."

SNORK!