Tweet Of The Month

A trio of goodies this month...

 

Post Title Of The Month

Take it away, DumbJon!

Quote Of The Month

MacHeath on the NHS, our 'wonder of the world': 

"The word she used on the phone to describe the clinic staff was ‘heartless’, without the slightest warmth or compassion; how else could you describe refusing treatment to a woman of 80, in severe pain and unable to walk unaided, and sending her back to an empty house to embark on the complicated process of ordering a Covid test online?"

Post Of The Month

David Thompson on a rather....interesting...policy to be adopted in US schools. 

More Of This!

A councillor who decorated his house for Halloween was asked to remove his ghosts and ghouls as they were 'scaring children' and affecting the mental health of passersby.

By one person. One.  

Ashan Jeeawon, 42, who works as a property stylist, was told his floating skeleton displays were detrimental to the mental health of the community.

But when he put the decorations up for a public vote, neighbours were overwhelmingly in favour of keeping the house of 'horrors'.

Heh!  

Mr Jeeawon, who lives in Bexhill, East Sussex, with his partner, sister, her three kids and his parents, decorates their house for every major holiday including Christmas, Easter, Diwali and Armistice Day.

Good for him! 

While he hasn't responded to the email yet, he is determined to keep the decorations.

Excellent! If only more people refused to be cowed by someone claiming to be 'offended', the world would be a much better place. 

'What an unpleasant, small-minded, grossly insensitive and unChristian thing to say and think.'

Well, yes, Paolo, that's the modern church for you. 

For every Dean of Southwark, willing to host a memorial service for a beloved cat, there's probably ten or more like the Bishop of Burnley, eager to support every right on political move around, yet unable to comprehend that most churchgoers would rather see a cat than a clergyman when they go to church...  

Well, It'll 'Free You Up', It's True...

Police should be freed from handling some domestic abuse and harassment complaints so they can focus on fighting crime and responding to emergencies, one of the country’s most senior police officers has suggested.

David Thompson, chief constable of West Midlands police, said forces were increasingly responsible for “policing relationships”, safeguarding and protection but it was “debatable whether or not that’s actually something best discharged by the police in all cases”.

...but I suspect you'll merely spend that extra time policing Christmas parties and pandering to fringe causes instead. 

As well as whining in the media that you've been wronged when we recognise you for the lazy, risk-averse identity politics-pandering farce that you really are.

Once Again, The Most Dangerous Thing In The World Is A Policeman With A Twitter Account...

Michael Robinson, 30, decided he had no choice but to close Bridge Bar, on High St, last Saturday, as Tier 2 restrictions, which prohibit people from different households mixing indoors, came into force.

But on Saturday afternoon, Copers Cope Police tweeted the bar had been “ordered to close” after it “repeatedly breached Covid regulations”, despite the business never having been visited by the police or Council.

But it's OK, if he sues, it won't come out of their pockets. It'll be the taxpayer on the hook. Again. 

A clarification published today, almost 48 hours later, read: “Yesterday local police incorrectly stated that the Bridge Bar and Coach and Horses in Beckenham were ordered to close.

“This was incorrect.

“This was a management decision and not a police requirement.”

Given even new Twitter character limit isn't generous, wouldn't it have been easier to just say 'We lied'...? 

Is It Me, Or...?

More than 1,000 people who should have been self-isolating after entering the UK from abroad could not be traced by the police, the figures showed.

Officers calling to carry out checks found 380 people had given the wrong address so they could not be found, and another 629 were out when officers attended and so also faced no further police action.

If they were out, then...they weren't 'self-isolating', were they? And didn't it occur to the police to go back another time? 

This little nugget appears that the end of an article on Merseyside top cop vowing to crack down on Christmas parties if only enough people will snitch on their neighbours. 

You really couldn't make it up, could you?

Political Correctness Costs Lives...

Kyle Lawler, who was 18 at the time, was on duty when a colleague, Mohammed Agha, told him a member of the public had raised concerns about Abedi, who was hanging around outside the Arena at an Ariana Grande concert.

Mr Lawler said he was stood 10 or 15ft away from Abedi, who had been reported to security by a member of the public who thought he looked 'dodgy'.

Why did the other guard not act? Because he was 'guarding a fire door', apparently! 

Which is a shame, because - as a man of the same race as the terrorist - he surely wouldn't have been beset by the same doubts? 

The Showsec security guard, aged 18 at the time of the terror attack, told police in a statement read to the inquiry sitting in Manchester:

'I felt unsure about what to do.

'It's very difficult to define a terrorist. For all I knew he might well be an innocent Asian male.

'I did not want people to think I am stereotyping him because of his race. I was scared of being wrong and being branded a racist if I got it wrong and would have got into trouble.

'It made me hesitant.

'I wanted to get it right and not mess it up by over-reacting or judging someone by their race.'

Do you think, Reader, this will give any of the devotees of identity politics pause? Do you think anyone will stop and say 'Maybe pushing this agenda cost innocent concertgoers their lives?'..?

I wish I thought it would. 

It's Time Sage Got Stuffed!

Dr Yvonne Doyle, medical director of Public Health England, today warned the rising death toll from Covid-19 was likely to 'continue for some time' because of the spike in cases. It can take infected patients several weeks to fall severely ill, meaning the consequences of Britain's spiralling outbreak are only just starting to be seen.

But the number of deaths is still a far-cry away from the peak of the pandemic during the spring, when more than 9,400 patients died in the worst week. And to bring the figures into perspective, Covid-19 was only responsible for one in 16 total deaths in the UK in the most recent week, and flu and pneumonia killed twice as many people.

Enough is enough! I never thought I'd say this but...perhaps we should be more European? 

The 'Guardian' View - Wrong On All Counts...

More than 200 people gathered outside a former military barracks housing asylum seekers near Folkestone, to counter rising far-right activity against migrants.

They aren't asylum seekers, those objecting aren't 'far right' and they've got no quarrel with 'migrants', just with illegal immigrants like these... 

After the welcome event, around 50 protesters brandishing St George’s and the British flags marched while chanting racist messages.

Nice dog-whistle about flags there, but I note that there's no description of the so-called 'racist messages'. Probably because that too is wrong. Surely our oh-so-woke police would have sprung into action if they truly had been? 

“The vast majority of people are supportive of migrants, but we don’t always hear their voice, we hear the voice of a very vocal, significant minority,” said Bridget Chapman, from the Kent Refugee Action Network.

It's probably true that the vast majority of people are 'supportive of migrants', yes. But they certainly aren't supporting of freeloaders crossing the Channel to disappear into the black economy... 

Among those supporting asylum seekers was Ross Emans, 43, who came with his son. “This is the first time I’ve been involved with a demonstration to support migrants,” he said, holding a sign that read: “Welcome.”

“I used Google to translate “welcome” to Arabic. Hopefully, it’s correct!”

Why Arabic, Ross? Are you making a bit of an assumption there? 

Still Rumbling On...

...back in Vange:

South Essex Islamic Trust plans to develop the former Barge Inn, in High Road, Vange, into a culture centre, but Basildon Council is not assured concerns over noise and parking will be dealt with.

But the trust says it has done all it can and handed over more than enough information for the council to make a decision.

The decision should be 'No', then. Will it be? 

They Should All Sue The Police....

A Northumbria Police spokesperson said: 'The dog was seized because it had characteristics similar to that of a Pit Bull Terrier which is a banned breed under the Dangerous Dogs Act 1991.

'The animal was housed in kennels and assessed by a dog expert. It was acknowledged that it was a cross-breed and had shown no previous signs of aggression, so was therefore returned to the owner on an interim basis.'

Just weeks later, a student walking his dog paid the price. 

Also the kitchen worker who came to his aid, and then its owner and her father, before armed cops showed up to do what they should have done in the first place.

Judge Tim Gittins sentenced Porteous to eight months imprisonment, suspended for 18 months, with 80 hours unpaid work.

*sighs*

I Thought 'Romance' Meant Hearts And Flowers...

Police have praised the 'true bravery' of a woman who was 'lucky to survive' a knife attack at her home.

Oh no! One of those rare stranger attacks? 

Risman Naitsoka, 40, of Grove Street, Wantage, stabbed his victim in the chest after she refused to have sex with him.

A rapist burglar? 

Speaking after the sentencing hearing investigating officer, Detective Constable Martin Whaley, based at Oxford police station, praised the victim's 'true bravery.' He said: “I am pleased with the sentence the court has passed, and feel it reflects the true gravity of this crime.

“The victim has shown true bravery in seeing this case through, and justice has now rightly been served.

"She is lucky to have survived such an awful assault, and I hope this sentence encourages other victims of such offences to seek help and support themselves.

“The Police and Criminal Justice system are here to fight your corner and to bring offenders to justice.”

Wait, why would someone testifying against an attacker be 'brave' to do so?  

During the case it was revealed that the stabbing took place at an address in Wantage on November 5 last year.

Naitsoka had been in a 'romantic relationship' with his victim which was described as 'tempestuous.'

Naitsoka went to the woman's Wantage home and while there he propositioned the woman for sex, which she declined.

Ah.  

Daily Express Gobbledegook

This means it is crucial that cars which have not yet been sold do leave the forecourt in time for deadlines.

An analysis from BuyaCar revealed that the biggest saving on the market could be made on an Audi A8 Saloon.

The model had a precious lost piece of £72,310 but was now available for just £42,400.

This equated to a massive 41.36 percent saving or a cash discount of £29,910.

*baffled face* 

H/T: Clive Day via email

Never Forget The Awesome Responsibility Of Local Journalism...

...and how its brave reporters bring you all the most important local issues.

Sunday Funnies...

Sean Connery as Hannibal Lecter? *shudders*

Caption Competition!

Remember the police union trying to tell us in the last post how 'stretched' the police were? 

Yes, it's South Yorkshire Police taking aim at their own foot again again...

The officers will be sent out when there are reports of the rules being broken after the public requested "targeted action", South Yorkshire Police said.

Now you listen to the public..?

Assistant Ch Con David Hartley said: “We started by focusing our efforts on engagement and education to allow people time to become aware of and understand the rules."

You mean the ones that keep changing? And which are inadequately applied to all? 

"However, we continue to receive reports of blatant and persistent rule-breaking which must be addressed."

Why don't you just file them where you filed the Rotherham reports instead? 

H/T: Fidel via Twitter

We've All Gone Mad...

I almost can't believe what I'm reading and seeing...

Police last night revealed extraordinary plans to patrol the Anglo-Welsh border to stop families from crossing over for a half-term holiday as Wales is plunged into a two-week 'firebreak' lockdown.

Officers will prevent caravans sneaking into England from Wales and deter Welsh motorists defying First Minister Mark Drakeford's 'power-mad' orders from making 'non-essential' journeys.

And despite the police union's protestations, you just know there are some in the forces that are going to enjoy this, don't you, Reader? 

But the Police Federation of England and Wales has revealed that the ban is 'unenforceable', adding that policing which is 'already over-stretched due to the pandemic' would be complicated by the measure.

Really? Hadn't noticed them not responding to gatherings, unless they are of course those held by the protected groups... 

Tesco and Lidl workers became Wales' first 'trolley police' as they were seen hiding shelves of 'non-essential' products behind plastic sheets to stop customers buying them ahead of the start of the restrictions, which came in earlier this evening.

Plastic barriers and stacks of drinks crates were also set up to block off certain aisles while other items were taped off by staff as part of efforts to follow the draconian new rules.

*stunned amazement* What's the point of this?

Mr Drakeford described stopping supermarkets from selling non-essential products during the firebreak lockdown as 'a straightforward matter of fairness'.

He said: 'We are requiring many hundreds of small businesses to close on the high street right across Wales.

'We cannot do that and then allow supermarkets to sell goods that those people are unable to sell.'

This is the 'fairness' of spoiled children: "If I can't have it, no-one can!" 

'And we are looking to minimise the amount of time that people spend out of their homes during this two-week period.

'This is not the time to be browsing around supermarkets looking for non-essential goods.'

Least you think 'Ah, well, it's just Wales':

Makes sense, I suppose. It's 'Try (Communism) before you buy'! 

Well, This Is Inventive...

...his barrister, Neil Ronan, stressed that he still has neurological problems from a traumatic brain injury suffered in the collision on November 15 last year.

"The person before you today, by dint of these injuries, is not the person who caused the criminal behaviour," he said.

Did I say 'inventive'? Sorry. I meant 'taking the piss'.

Michael Lavery, prosecuting, told the court how Ashcroft, who had no licence or insurance, was riding a Kawasaki motorbike which had been stolen 10 days earlier.

"He was driving dangerously, so much so, that when he stopped the vehicle, the back wheel rose from the floor," said Mr Lavery, who added that witnesses estimate he was riding at 60mph in a 30mph zone before smashing into an Audi A3 as it turned right on Wigan Road, Leigh at 12.50pm.

"Witnesses to the accident as he went over the top of the car describe his driving as reckless and at very high speed," said Mr Lavery. Ashcroft was rushed to hospital with serious head injures, fractured spine and pelvis, an ankle injury and lacerated spleen.

"He was quite lucky to be alive," said Mr Ronan.

The general public, however, is very unlucky... 

Recorder Michael Hayton QC sentenced Ashcroft , who has no previous convictions, to 15 months in prison, suspended for two years and ordered him to participate in 30 days of rehabilitation activities. He was also banned from applying for a driving licence for two years.

That shouldn't really worry him, should it, since he never bothered to apply for one in the first place? 

Maybe She Misspoke...?

The founder of Kids Company used a 'threatening and bullying' tone with colleagues and ignored warnings about the dire financial state of the now-defunct charity, a court heard yesterday.

Camila Batmanghelidjh is said to have begged former PM David Cameron to bail out the charity by quadrupling Government funding.

She also boasted of a 'special relationship' with HMRC ...

I think she actually meant KFC.

In a meeting with senior employees she is said to have used a 'threatening and bullying' tone.

People who throw their weight about are the worst... 

Isn't This Perjury?

Stoica, of Hull, denied robbery but admitted theft. Stoian, who had 14 previous convictions for 27 offences, denied the offence outright and told officers he was a “God-fearing man and would never resort to stealing”.

Oh, well, I expect it amused the custody sergeant... 

Brendan O’Leary, defending Stoian, said the married father-of-two had been working at a recycling centre and was the main breadwinner for his family.

I really don't think a life of crime counts as 'breadwinning', does it?  Well, maybe in Romania... 

Glen Parsons, defending Stoica, said his client had never been in trouble before this “mean” offence and was remorseful.

Sure, sure, we believe you... 

Stoian was given an 18-month jail sentence. Stoica, due to his previous good character, received a 10-month prison term. They will both serve half their sentences behind bars before being released on prison licence.

Both men now face possible deportation, but Judge Hickey said that was a decision for the Home Secretary.

A pretty easy one, I'd hope... 

Keep Clapping, Fools...

...while they show utter contempt for the people who pay to use their service and can't. Especially the people most in need of it.

She Should Be Unassailable...

Teachers who present the idea of white privilege as a fact to their students are breaking the law, the women and equalities minister has told MPs.

Responding to the general debate on Black History Month being held by MPs, Kemi Badenoch took to the despatch box to describe critical race theory as “an ideology that sees my blackness as victimhood and their whiteness as oppression”.

The minister went on to hit out at schools who had expressed support for the “anti-capitalist” Black Lives Matter movement, arguing they had neglected their duty to political impartiality by embracing the group.

... but I suspect the vitriol she's going to attract from the Left will be far worse than any hatred from 'far Right' groups.

There Are No Words...

Why Is Professional Standards Not Closing This Account Down?

Yesterday, the GMP showed their utter ignorance of the basics of their job for all the world to see: 

This was left up despite being no different to their infamous Tweet about requiring 'proof' of exemption, which they were clearly ordered to delete. Being also ignorant of something called 'screenshotting':

With this attitude from the so-called 'law enforcers' is it really any wonder that we are seeing a rise in incidents such as this one, or this one? 

And why all the hysteria over salty language when basic ignorance of the law you're employed to uphold is allowed to be put on display for all to see?

Bet You All Wish Your Job Was This Exciting...

...I know I do!

The Zoom call was reportedly an 'election simulation', involving many of the magazine's biggest stars including Jane Mayer, Evan Osnos, Jelani Cobb and Sue Halpern.

I guess he misread it. 

He's Not Jean Valjean, Love...

What would she say to those who refuse to sympathise with Richardson? He is, after all, a criminal, and to many Americans the mantra is still: You do the crime, you do the time.

“I think it goes back to forgiveness,” says Bradley. “What do we gain as a society from excessive sentencing?”

...he didn't steal a loaf of bread to feed a starving child. He robbed a bank. And what we gain is safety from such criminals.

Technically, he is still not free, though: he will be on parole and under curfew for the next 40 years, Bradley points out.

“So again, as Fox has said herself, you commit one crime in the state of Louisiana as a black family and they have you for life.”

Well, seems the answer's simple then. 

There are grounds for hope, she believes. One is the fact that racial injustice and America’s prison-industrial complex are now mainstream topics.

“They’re being talked about in the media in the same way that Batman is being talked about, right?”

*puzzled face* 

These Self-Driving Cars Aren't Safe, Clearly...

*tuts* KITT has let himself go now the Hollywood allure has faded... 

A West Sussex Fire and Rescue Service crew from Billingshurst Fire Station were called to the scene and found the car had collided with a low wall, describing the driver as having had a “lucky escape”

Can't wait to see how they write these headlines in the future...

 

Plurals Are Hard....

...even for the police:

*sighs*

Scotland, Backward...?

Perish the thought!

H/T: Stephen Guy via email

Sunday Funnies...

Good to see old London Town in at No 4! 

Maybe You Should Have Looked Up 'Integrity' Before You Named Your Team...

Online marketplace Etsy has banned a seller from selling items carrying the slogan 'I love JK Rowling' claiming that it 'promotes hatred'.

*baffled face* 

In an email to the seller, a representative of the 'Etsy's Marketplace Integrity team' said they prohibit any products that 'promotes, supports, or glorifies hatred or violence towards protected groups'.

They added: 'This includes items or listings that are demeaning or disparaging towards people based upon: race, ethnicity, national origin, religion, gender, gender identity, disability, or sexual orientation.'

None of which she's done, of course, but this is yet another knee-jerk reaction to the onslaught from the perpetually offended, and Etsy has since been forced to climb down by a counter-campaign. 

But the marketplace has been slammed after social media users higlighted (sic) that their site also currently lists a postcard bearing the slogan 'F*** JK Rowling'.

Could have been avoided if you had done a bit of research into the deranged nature of the complainants, couldn't it? 

J K Rowling makes them lose all sense of proportion - case in point:

Yes, stating that the term 'women' has a biological background is exactly the same as attempted genocide.  

When VirtueSignalling Meets Adults In Charge...

Urchfont Parish Council was asked by a group of young people, upset by the death of George Floyd in America, if they could use the box to create ‘a historical information point’.

Their idea of history doesn't seem to go back too far, does it? 

Emily Kinnaird told the meeting: 'Me and my friends thought it would be beneficial if Urchfont showed its support for the Black community.

'I think it is important to use education to raise awareness of racism especially in predominantly white Wiltshire.'

Of course you did, you snotty little brat.  

However, a majority of the local council claimed: 'The telephone box should be used only for local community purposes, as such this proposal covering the wider issue of racism should be rejected.'

Well, you got what you really wanted, kiddies - publicity. 

Those Wheels Grinding Too Slowly Again...

A trial relating to the alleged non-recent sexual exploitation of children in Halifax has been delayed by a year.

Amjad Hussain, also known as Amjad Ditta, is among 16 men charged in relation to the alleged abuse of three teenage girls in Halifax between 2006 and 2009.

And why single him out? Well, he's... a police officer. 

His co-accused are:

Mohammed Vaqaas Abbas, 30, who denies three counts of rape and three of supplying a class C drug

Nadeem Adalat, 34, who has pleaded not guilty to four charges of rape and four of supply of a class C drug

Sajid Adalat, 44, who denies rape

Waseem Adalat, 33, who denies two counts of rape, as well as single counts of trafficking, supply of a class C drug and common assault

Christopher Eastwood, 45, who has pleaded not guilty to two counts of rape and two counts of supply of a class C drug

Mahtab Islam, 46, who denies six counts of rape, three of supplying a class A drug, three of supplying a class C drug, two of sexual assault and one of conspiracy to pervert the course of justice

Mohammed Rizwan Iqbal, 34, who denies a charge of rape

Ishtiaq Latif, 32, who has pleaded not guilty to sexual activity with a child

Asad Mahmood, 33, who denies two counts of rape, one of trafficking and one of common assault

Younis Mohammed, 34, who has pleaded not guilty to rape and causing a person to engage in sexual activity without consent

Shahzad Nowaz, 40, who has denied rape, supply of a class C drug and making threats to kill

Shazad Nazir, 44, who has pleaded not guilty to two counts of rape and two of supply of a class C drug

Sohail Zafar, 36, who has denied rape and supplying a class C drug

Nadeem Nassir, 39, who faces charges of rape, supplying a class C drug and making threats to kill

Khalifa Mughal, 36, who faces six counts of rape, as well as single counts of supply of a class C drug, supply of a class A drug and conspiracy to pervert the course of justice

 You have to wonder what Christopher's doing in that list, don't you?

The trial has been listed for October 4 next year.

Why so long? 

Ditta is on unconditional bail.

Favourable treatment? 

The 15 other defendants are on bail with conditions, including to live and sleep at their home address and inform police of any plans to travel outside the UK.

Yeah. I'm sure that'll happen... 

Good Question...

Abdul was the twin brother of Abdullah who was killed fighting the regime of Syrian dictator Bashar Al-Assad in Syria in 2016, he was 18. Their brother Jaffar, 17, was killed in 2014 in the country while trying to fight the government there. They are survived by fourth brother, Amer, a former finance student, who also travelled to Syria and remains there.

But I think I know the answer. Do you, Reader? 

There's Absolutely Nothing 'Unbelievable' About This...

A baby girl suffered catastrophic brain damage after a hospital allowed a midwife who had been 'banned for incompetence' to help deliver her. 

Unbelievably, Sophie Addo, the midwife responsible for the birth, should not even have been present, having been 'excluded from working in all areas of the hospital' just days earlier after failing a retraining course on how to properly understand heart rate monitor readings.

...as a glance at the image of the midwife in question will tell you. 

And lest anyone think that the midwives are the only source of gross incompetence at Newham Hospital:

The midwife...said last night she had not been informed about the ban at the time. Remarkably, staff at the hospital's birth unit were not told either.

Still clapping for these clowns, are we?

Isn't This Soliciting?

An app allows users to record their interaction with police and securely store the footage using “military grade encryption”.

Should the user be arrested, they can immediately contact the Legal Lifelines team for advice.

Who have, coincidentally, produced the app! 

Mr Herford, 38, said: “We know that BAME people, as well as minority communities such as Travellers, are likely to experience disproportionately negative outcomes at work, or when engaging with the authorities.

“We aim to empower them with the knowledge they need to protect themselves by bringing them critical information on legal issues that affect them such as stop and search, county lines, human slavery and protest law.”

Oh, really? And here's me thinking you were just fishing for more trade... 

The collaborative effort will combine some of the most skilled lawyers in the country with the determined efforts of the charity and entertainment sectors to provide access to the best advice.

Oh, I always go to the entertainment sector for legal advice! Doesn't everyone? 

Darwin Wins Again!

Officers had been patrolling the River Lea towpath in Tottenham on bicycles on at 9.15pm on Wednesday and approached a group of males.

While one was arrested, two made off by bike and were chased by police also on bikes. The two suspects are understood to have entered the river at Ferry Lane a few minutes later.

One of the two males was later pulled out by officers but the second male could not be found, the Met said.

 Oh, well, No loss. 

The Independent Office for Police Complaints (IOPC) is now investigating how the two individuals came to be in the water and said it has taken initial statements from the officers involved.

It now wants to speak with anyone who may have witnessed or filmed any part of the incident.

So, the police do the job we actually pay them for (for once), but you want to find something to hang them with?   

Commander Paul Brogden said: “I fully recognise the concern this incident will cause among members of the local community.”

If it was a real 'community', they'd be hanging out the bunting at the removal of a threat... 

Maybe You Should Take A Word Out Of Your Twitter Handle?

Like maybe, 'biology'. And if the Queen is listening, that 'Royal' has clearly overstayed its welcome.

Not Another One..!?

A married probation officer has been jailed for 10 months after she had a four-month relationship with a high-risk violent offender.

What are they putting in the tea in the staff rooms of justice system buildings? It should be bromide!

Sellar, who joined the probation service aged 18, has been jailed for 10 months at Stoke-on-Trent Crown Court.

Sellar achieved two degrees and worked her way up the career ladder to land her dream job as a probation officer in early 2018, prosecutor Daniel Osborne said.

Looked good on the books, but couldn't hack the job. Don't they do any psychological testing? 

Mr Whitehead said that Sellar's husband had a gambling addiction and the household debt was close to £50,000.

/facepalm 

Congratz, NCA!

Jolly well done! Now, don't rest on your laurels, eh?

*taps foot* We're waiting...

Who Could Have Predicted This?

Oh, yeah. That's right. Everyone. 

Author and 'body positivity' blogger (Ed: they mean 'fat person', dear Reader) Stephanie Yeboah was hired as a contributing editor by the fashion and lifestyle weekly last month to 'fight for diversity, inclusion and women's rights'.

And how exactly did she decide to do this? 

But the 31-year-old activist has been axed over hateful remarks about the Holocaust including 'every Jew has an attic but not every attic has Jews', and a bizarre tweet which said: 'AUSCHWITZ Gas Chamber Music LMAO SMH (laughing my a*** off, shaking my head).'

Well, you could knock me down with a feather! Which is more than you could do with Ms Yeboah, it has to be said... 

She issued a grovelling apology after the offending Twitter posts were published by Private Eye magazine last Wednesday.

It is understood there were frantic discussions with Grazia UK editor Hattie Brett before the decision was finally made to sack her on Friday evening.

Oh, to have had a wiretap on those! 

It's A Wonder She Finds The Time To Steal...

 ...she must spend a lot of time on a sunbed.

Wigan magistrates told Amadine Webster: "The shopkeepers who are trying to run legitimate businesses, particularly at this time, deserve to be protected from your actions.

"It is abundantly clear that you will continue to offend unless the court takes strong action against you."

Sadly, it's highly unlikely it'll be strong enough... 

The court heard that the criminal behaviour order had been made on January 30 last year but in the latest breach Webster, aged 36, of Heywood Gardens, Bolton, stole goods worth £106 from Boots in Mealhouse Lane on August 26 and also endered (sic) the Redd clothing store in Victoria Square.

"According to your interview you said that the thought that the order had ended. Even if that had been the case, and it clearly isn’t, you still took the opportunity to continue your depredations of the retail shop owners in Bolton," Webster was told.

Because that's exactly the way these creature's 'minds' work: the sentence is ended? OK! Back to normal. 

Which means, petty theft. No sentence will ever be a deterrent to these kinds of criminals. So, shouldn't it switch aims, and become a protection instead? 

Is There A Competition For 'Most Awkward Headline'..?

If so, I think we have a winner.

"Hey, Editor, Any Animal That Kills Is A 'Predator', Right..?"

"Errr, yeah. I think that's right..."

Sunday Funnies...

And yet these days, we try to use Excel as a medical database. What went wrong? 

Why Does Anyone Trust Doctors?

A 13-year-old boy who raped a seven-year-old girl on more than one occasion over a period of four months has been...

I'm sad to report that the answer almost certainly isn't 'put down like the animal he is'. What paltry sentence did he get? 

...spared a custodial sentence.

*blinks* 

Prosecuting, Karen Brooks told the court: “When the offences came to light the defendant, who turns 16 in November, was challenged by an adult who told him what he did was wrong.

“He told the adult, ‘I know but she enjoyed it’.

Where's the outrage by feminists? Why aren't they raising hell? Why isn't this front page news in the 'Guardian'? 

The court heard that the teen’s motive for carrying out such depraved acts was as revenge for something an adult had done to him in the past, and he expressed no remorse about his behaviour.

He was taken to a secure children’s home in Cheshire the day after being interviewed but wasn’t charged until September 2019.

Hmmm.... 

Defending barrister Bob Elias said his client was co-operating and benefitting from being in stable accommodation in Cheshire, and that the lack of stability and inconsistent parenting in his young life seems to have been a problem for him.

I wonder just what sort of background - and 'community' - we are talking about here..? 

At the request of judge Simon Newell, the defendant had been assessed by a child psychiatrist over concerns raised about his potential to possess psychopathic tendencies, due to the absence of sexual motivation in terms of the assaults, and worries about him presenting as a danger to the public in the future.

Well, quite! 

Judge Newell said: “It is very unusual to have this sort of offending without any sexual motive. If someone is prepared to do this in anger or revenge or otherwise, how is that not part of his character and would that not lead to a danger in the future?

“He has used a sexual attack as a means of getting revenge and I have concerns that might happen again.”

But clearly not enough to do what's needed to protect the public. Why? 

However, following a psychiatric report, he was diagnosed with attachment disorder, with doctors agreeing the potential for any psychopathy to be extremely low.

Because they're so good at assessing risk..? 

Judge Newell said: “I have to make sure you get the best rehabilitation possible and giving you a custodial sentence would disturb the work that has already been done and set you back considerably and make you a danger to the public.”

The teenager was handed a three-year youth rehabilitation order and ISSP, which he would serve at the secure home in Cheshire, and was made subject to a 12-year sexual harm prevention order and 12-year notification provision.

Do you feel safer, Reader? 

"Those that shout the loudest seldom have the support of the majority or their moral backing."

I think my love affair with Brexit may be over:

Lord Goldsmith, the Government's animal welfare minister and a close friend and political ally of Boris Johnson and his fiancee Carrie Symonds, is understood to be spearheading the move.

The Government is considering plans to prohibit the import of wild animal fur into the UK that would essentially forbid the sale of clothes containing fur in shops after the transition period.

We're really going to prevent free people from buying items of clothing that are sustainable and natural? This is what we voted for Brexit to accomplish? Really? 

Defra — the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs — is expected to publish a consultation paper after the transition period ends this year.

Leaked Defra documents seen by The Daily Telegraph showed Lord Goldsmith met with the executive director of anti-fur organisation, Humane Society International, on May 12 in which he asked if there were any particular areas, in relation to the fur trade, that the Government should research.

And why is the connection to Carrie Symonds a factor? Reader, I'm glad you asked...

Last year, Ms Symonds blasted people who wanted to buy fur as 'sick'. She has also campaigned against whaling, and reportedly swayed Mr Johnson in his decision to axe a proposed badger cull in Derbyshire.

Yes, it appears public policy is now decided on the autocratic whim of whoever Boris is doing at this particular moment.  

Control The Language, Advance The Agenda...

New guidelines have been created for reporting on road collisions...

Did we need them? 

...following in the footsteps of similar best practice on stories relating to suicide, domestic violence and refugees.

Oh, wait, I see where this is going... 

The draft guidelines, which have been put out for consultation in the hope of becoming an agreed industry standard, come after years of cyclists feeling frustrated by road deaths being painted as “unavoidable accidents” rather than “the result of very avoidable criminal behaviour”.

But not by them, of course. Oh no! 

The new suggested rules could ban the use of the word “accident” when describing collisions and crashes to meet higher standards of impartiality, especially when the facts of what happened are not yet known.

Well, that's actually quite logical, I'll grant you. 

They also want journalists to avoid mention of helmets, high-vis or any other protective equipment “except when demonstrably relevant” and call for human actors to always be mentioned in coverage of collisions – for example by saying a driver, not a car, hit a cyclist.

 And so's the latter. It's always been a personal peeve of mine. But the mention of lack of safety clothing is perverse...

Who is arguing for this, anyway?

The guidelines have been produced by the University of Westminster’s Active Travel Academy in collaboration with the National Union of Journalists’ ethics council, state-approved press regulator Impress, road safety charities and a range of policing, academic and expert figures.

Ah. The usual suspects. 

H/T: James via Twitter 

Just Don't Frighten The Horses...

LGBT rights campaigner Peter Tatchell today accused a council of 'homophobia' for taking out a court injunction to stop gay men having public sex in a park.

Actually, it bans sexual activity of any kind. Thus covering heterosexual dogging too.  

The 68-year-old activist complained London's Southwark Council had failed to liaise with the local gay community before taking legal action concerning Burgess Park.

Wait, what? First, there's no such thing as 'a gay community' that can take a considered and representative view on this - for every fresh air exhibitionist, there's probably three or four gay couples who'd no more dream of alfresco cavorting than anyone else.

Secondly, since when did anyone consult law-breakers before ensuring there were penalties should they continue to break the law?  

It's not the only concern of park-goers, after all:

One incident allegedly saw a woman with young children see three men having sex in a wooded area of the park at 8am one morning during the school holidays in August.

Neighbours have also complained about live music in the park until 3am and claim there has been a huge amount of litter including condoms in recent months.

There are also said to have been problems with drug-dealing gangs in the park as well as people carrying weapons, with police carrying out sweeps in the area.

I don't expect we'll see gangs demand the council consult with them before slapping weapon-carrying on the list, but then, 2020 has been such a bonkers year I wouldn't really be surprised if they did... 

If The Pussy Pass Is Declined, Try For An Oscar!

Andrew Davidson, prosecuting, said Darling had told a “pack of lies and falsehoods” to police - over a five year period up to March 2018 - about her ex-partner including that he raped her, stalked her, had tried to kill her, had a gun, and lied to his employer's HR that he had slept with the employer’s wife.

While Mr Davison was prosecuting there was a sudden commotion in the dock as Darling appeared to pass out, and court staff helped her while she lay flat on the floor.

Nice try, love. 

During an afternoon hearing Miss Nixon said Darling was a diabetic and suffered from mental health issues, adding “it is quite clear her physical condition will make a custodial sentence difficult".

Tough. Those are called 'consequences'. 

Judge Burbridge said what Darling did over a long period had been "extremely serious" and wasted police resources in Bedfordshire and Kidderminster investigating the false complaints.

He jailed Darling for 20 months, and granted a restraining order for her partner.

Nice to see a judge get tough for once, though it's a pitiful sentence compared to what the man would have got, and it's a shame to see 'wasting police resources' as the key issue...

But still, baby steps! 

Accidents Happen. Again.

Just like the State deciding to persecute the innocent. Again.

A judge apologised to an 83-year-old woman after she was hauled before a court charged with killing a speeding biker doing over 100mph at the time of a fatal crash.

Mavis Witts was cleared of any wrongdoing after she was accused of being responsible for the death of Stephen Ferguson, 51, on April 21 last year.

And this one wasn't even a cop!

A court heard ... Mrs Witts could do nothing to avoid the collision.

So why was she charged? This takes two - the police and the CPS. Why did both fuck up yet again? 

And after having legal proceedings lingering over her for the past 18 months, the pensioner was finally exonerated of any blame on Tuesday. Judge Sylvia de Bertodano apologised for the 'distress' caused by her case after the prosecution offered no further evidence at Warwick Crown Court.

The judge was particularly savage in her summing up: 

Judge de Bertodano said: 'You may not get an apology from anyone else, so you are going to get one from me.

'It would be very distressing to be involved in such a collision, and to then get suggestions it was your fault, when it is perfectly clear that it is not, must be even more distressing.

'There is no suggestion at all that you did anything wrong. It could have happened to anyone.'

Indeed. Both the collision, and the subsequent wasted efforts and taxpayer resources. 

They're Like Buses, They Come In Pairs...

Following on from this post, I'm alerted to an even more egregious case - and this one saw the pussy pass declined for once, and for good reason:

Stephanie Smithwhite, 40, denied cutting a hole in the trousers of her prison uniform was for a sexual purpose, but the sentencing judge said it was hard to imagine why else it was there.

*boggle* 

The judge said she was infatuated with him, as demonstrated by her tattoo of the name Curtis next to a rose.

Hmm, can't have been hard for the authorities to twig what was going on. But why didn't she try the 'I haven't been trained not to screw the inmates' excuse? 

He was also known to have started relationships with other prison staff previously, but Smithwhite failed to resist him, despite undergoing training about manipulative and corrupting inmates.

Oh. Right.  

At first she denied having a physical relationship with the Liverpudlian. Police searched her home and found more notes, a copy of his autobiography called Cocky, The Rise And Fall Of Curtis Warren, Mr Doswell said.

They searched the business of one of her relatives and discovered 450 letters, many of which contained sexual fantasies.

They found a white Samsung phone in her car which was only used to ring one number – traced to Frankland Prison, and used by Warren.

I think that's what they call 'bang to rights'... 

In interviews with detectives, she was said to be “devastated” but hoped there was an outside chance their relationship could continue.

It'd be funny, if it wasn't so serious... 

H/T:@SClattuc via Twitter  

What A Coincidence!

I knew it wouldn't be long before we heard from this bunch again...

A spokeswoman for Bark n Fly told the Daily Record: “We can confirm that on Friday, September 25, there was an incident involving an altercation between two dogs which was witnessed by a member of our team who is a retired Police Officer.

“Coincidentally, also the owner of the dog that was injured.”

Well, I never!  

“A full incident report and witness statement has been completed and the incident has now been reported to Police Scotland and to the local Dog Warden.”

Oh, really? 

The Daily Record approached Police Scotland for comment but were told no report could be found.

Well, I suppose they could have lost it. In a ditch somewhere.  

Lewis says he was 'not surprised' by the behaviour of the kennel towards Gosia. He told the Record:

“I was quite shocked but sadly not surprised to hear about the incident with Dash at Bark n Fly.

“This is yet another incident in an area not covered by CCTV and further evidence of lack of controls and supervision.”

One to watch! 

What's To Consider?

Bedfordshire Police dispatched officers to the area when "large crowds" gathered outside a church in Dunstable.

Conservative MP for the town Andrew Selous said he was very angry about the "flagrant breach" of rules at the "traveller funeral".

The force said it will review evidence and consider taking action.

Only 'consider'? Hmmm. Are they going to plead ignorance of the law (the travellers, that is. we all know the police aren't too hot on it themselves)? 

Ch Insp Lee Haines said: "We worked with the local authority, the cemetery and the funeral directors prior to this event so people could attend to pay their respects while following social distancing measures.

"The funeral was initially attended by lower numbers of people, as planned, but larger crowds subsequently started gathering outside the church where the funeral was taking place."

And did your officers take any action? No. Of course not. And I bet you won't take any action now, either.  

Mr Selous, the MP for South West Bedfordshire, said "We are all under the law and it is simply not right or acceptable for the rest of the population who have made such sacrifices to see others getting away with such behaviour."

Clearly, Mr Selous, you're wrong. We aren't 'all under the law' at all. Not until it is applied to all without fear and favour, and breaches of covid rules receive the same rapid police action from Dunstable to Ilford. 

H/T: CJ Nerd via email

I Think You Can Guess It's 'Not Like This'...

Julian Nutter, defending, said: "He is ashamed of himself and what he's done. He deeply regrets what he has done."

"Lockdown was something of an experience I don't think anybody of our generation had lived through. People didn't know how to react."

Most, if not all, appear to have made it without losing their rag and assaulting their neighbours. Though I'm sure for some, it's been a close-run thing.  

He told the court that during this incident Bates "went bananas", but explained Bates did use a foam extinguisher and he "wouldn't have dreamt of using a powdered extinguisher".

Well, I should think so too! 

Magistrates handed Bates a 12-month community order and 60 Rehabilitation Activity Requirements. Bates must also complete 120 hours of unpaid work and pay each victim £100 compensation.

He was also ordered to pay £85 in prosecution costs and a victim surcharge of £95.

I bet it cost considerably more in actual costs to bring this to trial. 

So..?

Sky News takes part in a joint investigation with The Guardian, Bellingcat and Lighthouse Reports.

Ooh! Is it into government incompetence?  

UK-made anti-riot gear has been widely used in America during clashes with Black Lives Matter protesters, despite the government's claim there is "no evidence" British equipment was used, Sky News has found.

Elmo Shrug GIF from Elmo GIFs

Oh, wait! Is it illegal? 

There is no suggestion of wrongdoing by DMS Plastics, which manufactures the shields, which are a form of personal protection equipment, and sold them legally to a US distributor.

Well, imagine my baffled face then... 

Emily Thornberry, the shadow trade secretary, says the review is not robust: "We should have done a proper review and we should have stopped it." She adds: "You're not allowed to sell riot equipment if it is being used for internal repression. So then the question is: What is internal repression?"

Why are you asking, Emily? Shouldn't you know? 

"Well, internal repression is unlawfully hitting people, let's say, a cancer victim with a stick, it is attacking members of the press, it is using unlawful violence, it is using it in order to suppress legitimate, lawful demonstrations."

Gosh, we wouldn't want to be unlawfully hitting people, would we? Or attacking members of the press? 

And suppressing legitimate lawful demonstrations is something Labour never did when in power, right..?

The Black Lives Matter protests that have taken place since the end of May have been widely peaceful.

Liars.  

Well, This Is A Mystery....

...just who is it that's persecuting 'refugees' in France? 

It's couldn't be that fox-batterer Jolyon is talking out of his nether regions again?

Just How Big Is This Golf Course..?

And I'm not sure the wolves will feel at home with the African animals either...

Another Reason Not To Take Government Advice...

"Well, you see, officer, I ran into that car because I can't see where I'm driving when I look out of the driver's side window..."

Sunday Funnies...

 Hollywood is all about endless reinvention...

Wait, You Need Training Not To Do This..?

A prison officer who had an affair with an inmate was spared an immediate jail sentence today after a judge ruled her 'lack of training' was partly to blame.

*speechless* 

Rocha, of Norwich, was vulnerable at the time as she had only come out of an eight year abusive relationship in 2017.

/facepalm 

She said she knew the relationship with a prisoner was wrong but claimed she had only been given one training session on the issue.

I was only given one training session on not sticking my fingers into a running office shredder, and I'm typing this with both hands! 

The judge added: 'It's the resources that are just not there. It's not your fault that you didn't have sufficient training.

'Once the resources are there, then this sort of offending will diminish. That is where the heart of the problem arises.'

No, judge, I think the heart of the problem lies in recruiting people manifestly unsuited to the job on identity politics grounds, and then allowing them to avoid any trace whatsoever of personal responsibility, aided and abetted by a judicial system that also manifestly unsuited to the task.

And there's nothing whatsoever that 'more resources' will do to fix this... 

Judge Beverley Lunt Gets Something Right At Last...

David Bunting, a Greater Manchester Police constable with more than 20 years' experience, attended the man's bungalow with paramedics because he was in 'a dire medical situation', a court was told.

His family had raised urgent concerns over his welfare and dialled 999.

And lo, a goodly servant of the state hove into view to save the day! 

The footage, recorded on a CCTV system the victim had set up to watch over his living room, shows Bunting wearing blue gloves standing beside the victim as he's assessed by two paramedics.

He waits until the paramedics help the man up from a chair and walk him outside to an ambulance. Bunting, who has now been jailed, is then shown to calmly reach down to a coffee table and swipe the bag, which contained £70 in coins.

Oh. 

He appeared at Preston Magistrates Court in March and pleaded guilty to one count of theft from a dwelling. Last month he was sentenced to three months in prison, but an appeal against the sentence was lodged immediately.

Wait, what? 

But after hearing the facts and mitigation at Preston Crown Court, Judge Beverley Lunt, sitting with two magistrates, dismissed the appeal and Bunting is now serving the three month sentence.

Good grief! If you can't convince the Bleeding Heart of Bleeding Hearts, who can you convince? 

The court heard Bunting, a police officer since 1998, was now facing the sack.

Wait, you mean, he hasn't already been given the sack? What was his defence, anyway? 

Nicholas Walker, appearing for Bunting, said the offence would 'appal the policing community, as well as the community at large'. He argued the sentencing magistrates had put 'too much weight on sending out a message' and not enough on Bunting's background and mental health.

If he suffers from 'mental health issues', what the hell is he doing walking a beat? What sort of mental health issues, anyway? 

The court heard the officer suffers from PTSD and a major depressive illness.

*stunned face* 

It's A Dirty Job, But....

...someone's gotta do it!

Environmental enforcement officers are speaking to a man suspected to have defecated on a city centre wall.

Brighton and Hove City Council received the man’s details after the incident in Frederick Gardens, Brighton, was captured on film last Tuesday.

An apology was later daubed on the wall in brown pen.

Are we sure it was brown pen? 

"Both men were originally from Sudan and were claiming political asylum."

Mr Parry-Jones told the coroner Dawood's trial started on February 24 this year but on the sixth day of the trial he told the judge he wanted to plead guilty and be sentenced straightaway.

The judge remanded him overnight but Dawood was then found dead in his cell having apparently committed suicide, said Mr Parry-Jones. An inquest into Dawood's death, which is still being investigated by Avon and Somerset Police, is yet to take place.

Why are we wasting resources on an investigation? Haven't we wasted enough public money on two people with no right to be here anyway? 

How Much More Secure Does It Need To Be..?

Det Sgt Rachael Foy, from Bedfordshire Police, said: "We would urge all kennel owners as well as dog owners to ensure their dogs and premises are secure."

So....this wasn't? 

The kennel owner said the dogs were taken in about 10 minutes after the thieves scaled a 12-foot fence and smashed a fire door.

/facepalm

What exactly do you suggest then, DS Foy? 

"Well, actually..."

"This includes ensuring dogs are micro-chipped, installing CCTV and additional locks where possible, as well as not leaving dogs unattended in public places."

Not a public place. So irrelevant.  

 

Unlike The Coke And Heroin He Was Selling, No Sale...

Defending, Ms Keely Harvey argued there was an element of exploitation.

There was coercion with "threats made against Onyeasi and his family" after the youngster had run up drug debts.

She added that the assault was "more reckless than anything" and that he does show remorse.

Nope! Not buying it. 

However, Judge Peter Henry said he was motivated by financial or other advantages.

He said: "I have come to the conclusion an immediate custodial sentence is inevitable."

Branding him a "County Lines" drug dealer Judge Henry sentenced him to 26 months in a young offenders institution.

Finally, a judge not swayed by the usual lies...